Constant snacking ffs

[anothersuitcase]

So sick of this. My group of friends are obsessed with forcing snacks on their kids, they are literally never allowed to become hungry. I like my kids to feel hungry at mealtimes, and actually want to eat their dinner rather than pick at it. But every time we meet up snacks are produced or bought not even an hour after the last meal. Is it just the people I spend time with or is this the way things are now?

Yes I know you do get kids that need to eat regularly for various reasons, but surely not all kids? Is there actually anything wrong with a rumbling tum, even a bit of a gnawing hunger pang at mealtimes? I know I could tell my kids they can't partake but that is pretty awkward when all the others are tucking in.

I raised this with my friend today and she said something along the lines of this isn't post-war Britain and why deprive them when you don't have to? And I said that's exactly why there is a problem with obesity in children (her kids aren't obese to be fair) Things were slightly strained after that. So who is being unreasonable?

I've often wondered at this. Like the thing with the free fruit in the supermarket, why do kids need to be constantly eating? Why are they given food to keep them quiet?

Surely they can go an hour without having something to eat.

I give my children snacks... two for the day.

A fruit mid morning... and depending on the afternoon it could be homemade popcorn ( not the microwave kind... but in the pan)... or cheese and 3 Jacobs crackers or yoghurt and muesli or some peppers or homemade muffin.

Snacking is about timing ,we don't give late evening / afternoon snacks and we don't do pudding in my house, unless it's been a birthday & we have cake around to finish
My daughter has a very varied diet... only issues we have is getting her to eat meat.

We take snacks with us on the road should we be going out... and we don't buy snacks from the supermarkets, I used to but realised the sugar/salt content and started making my own.

But I agree with PP... parent how you want and stop judging others... it's a hard enough job!

I totally agree OP. It's irritating, 99% of snacks are unhealthy crap, and constant eating has to be linked to the overweight/obesity problem in this country.

My children are school age now and as soon as the majority of children come out of school they are handed a snack by their parents, invariably a chocolate bar, crisps or similar. My DC wait until they get home and I try and give them something slightly healthier, I'd rather not give them anything until dinner as they are good eaters and I know they will have eaten a decent lunch but they expect a snack now as a result of child care and everyone around them having one too.

outofmydepth they are all primary school aged, 5-11. I have a teen as well who doesn't usually come to meet-ups

I don't care about snacking when the child actually needs it and it is something reasonably filling/ healthy or both. Eg a hungry child having toast or an apple mid morning. It's this whole culture of following dc around offering food every 30 minutes. And imposing this idea that you have a snack because it's snack time or habit, rather than hunger that won't wait till the next meal.

I'm also not assured by the dc being a healthy weight being proof it is needed, unless the parents too are a healthy size and haven't had major struggles getting there. i.e parents have good eating habits. I've known loads of slim dc who got away with eating all the snacks & crap their parents constantly followed them about with. But when they've hit teens or adulthood are overweight, because they're sedentary just like their overweight parents are and have the same bad eating habits instilled as dc.

Em... mind your own business. My son doesn’t eat the same type of snacks as his wee pals, but I don’t sit there judging the other parents

But doesn't little and often stimulate the production of insulin in the body ? Couldn't this lead long term to insulin resistance which can cause diabetes ? In fact I thought that intermittent fasting is the way to go. Gives your body a rest from all that digestion.

I am not a doctor or expert. I have read a lot of Michael Mosley.

You only need to look at the baby food aisle in any supermarket and see the array of snacks for babies and toddlers to see where the 'issue' starts.
Long gone are the days of
Breakfast
Glass of milk and a digestive at 10.30 during Playschool.
Lunch.
Evening meal.

Parents these days are made to feel guilty if they're not taking a tub of carrots and hummus for the school run home.

YANBU, but many will think you are though so be prepared.

Some kids get very grumpy when hungry or thirsty. Others never notice that they are thirsty and need prompting to drink enough.

I don’t think it’s a big drama, it won’t hurt your kids to snack occasionally.

I did the same with mine as you do OP, a few years ago I posted almost the same thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/2376687-If-your-dc-dont-snack
It's very awkward because a lot of people are convinced it's essential to eat often, so you feel yourself explaining your reasoning for not doing the same, then you end up sounding preachy.
I agree that four hours is nothing between meals, sometimes I will say to my son after around that amount of time are you hungry yet or later? and he will often say hungry later as he knows what hunger is supposed to feel like and he knows he is not hungry enough to need to eat again yet. There is no 'hangry' or fear of hunger making him just eat now in prevention of it.
For me it's not what other peoples kids eat that's the problem, it's the undermining and the way I used to be made to feel neglectful.

yanbu at all. it can get really stressful. I hate it. the only thing that works is meeting up at a city farm. then you can say no-one eat do you want to catch ecoli???? but you can't go to the farm every day lol

You’re right but people don’t want to hear it. Snacking is unnecessary and contributors obesity, dental caries, diabetes, poor eating habits so poor nutrition. There is no need for snacking unless a child’s meal is delayed for some reason or they’ve done a lot of physical exercise.
Children should be learning to eat well at mealtimes. If they don’t eat their meal, the worst thing you can do is give them junk snacks.

Five small meals might be appropriate for a toddler but that is very different to snacking. Sooner a child eats the same three meals as the rest of the family the better.

I think stomachs get used to a routine. If they've got used to little and often, they miss it. Then meal time arrives and they only want a little and pick out what they like best from the plate. This leads to faddiness and 'not liking vegetables', by which they mean they don't like veg as much as chicken nuggets, not that they can't eat them.

So much of snacking isn't because the child is hungry. It's to keep them quiet in their buggy in a queue or a reward/bribe for good behaviour.

Snacks are much more available now than in the past. Whole aisles in the supermarket devoted to crisps, popcorn, mini chocolate bars, dried fruit etc. And the idea that raisins are a healthy snack is wrong. Dentists say they cause more decay than juice because they stick to the teeth.

I've noticed the increase over the last 15 years. My eldest gc is a far better eater than the youngest, who seems to spend his days grazing and never eats a decent meal.

I've noticed this too and I really don't understand it. DS is not even a year yet so the peer pressure hasn't hit us yet, but I don't intend to be carrying snacks around or offering anything between meals. Bad for his teeth definitely, plus I've read somewhere that regular snacks (even healthy / non-sugary ones) raise insulin levels and stop your metabolism functioning properly. Not sure if that's true though

My children need snacks or they are hangry arseholes. But if yours don't then just say so. Or let them have snacks on those occasions and then serve smaller meals. Really don't get the stressing over snacks!

‘Gnawing hunger’ YABU

Why don’t you tell your friends to their faces? Didn’t think so.

We take grapes and water to the cinema, for example. Maybe some other healthy stuff. We don't do fizzy drinks, though we might get a child size pizza and some ice cream after for lunch.

It seems to me that being a bit prepared avoids some of the marketing at the kids and is a bit healthier and also sets up fewer unhealthy cues for he future.

Although by snacks I mean a small biscuit and some grapes at 10am and an apple at 3pm - crisps and chocolate are treats.

You’re not alone, it irritates me too, OP. My DC eat 3 meals a day. The only times they get a snack is if there is to be a delay to mealtimes, such as when we’re travelling or they have after-school activities.

And don’t even get me started on the bottles of water! What can’t some people go more than 5 mins without sucking on a water bottle like some overgrown baby? It especially annoys me during yoga. It’s disruptive when people are getting up all the time for a drink. Aside from the fact that yoga is meant to be done on an empty stomach.

Another one who agrees with you op, neither of mine snacked in between meals, feeling hunger is a normal bodily function and should be recognised by children. If mine had snacked they wouldn’t have eaten at mealtimes. People eat too much food, this is why obesity is becoming an epidemic. Children feeling hunger pangs is not neglect

It's just as bad in the States. We see so many kids with constant snack routines, and the parents wonder why their tastes are so unadventurous and why their children don't bother eating much at mealtimes.

Our nearly 2 year old is large for his age and does the typical toddler thing of eating up to a small adult's portion sometimes in growth spurts, and other times subsisting for an entire day on a celery stick and three grapes plus a sippy of milk. But on celery-grape days, we don't force additional carbs on him or try to get him to eat over and over. Result? He wakes up the next day famished and gobbles up two eggs on toast for breakfast, then asks for a small handful of nuts afterward.

The Scottish NHS weaning guide says to provide 3 meals a day and 2 snacks in between as they have small stomachs and get hungry more quickly, so that’s what I try to do and what they get at Nursery.
At 16 months he can’t tell me if he’s hungry so I have to offer (although if we are at home he’ll sometimes go to his highchair or sit at my feet and look pleading!).
We try to keep it healthy-ish although when we are out and about the Baby snack biscuits and bars have started to feature since I’ve been back at work full time and no longer have time to make cheese and spinach muffins and the like!

Very strange to think it's ok your kids have gnawing hunger pangs.

Do you have a problem with food op? There is a big difference on stuffing yourself with snacks and being so hungry you've gnawing hunger pangs.

Your kids will grow up to binge probably because they were deprived and were so hungry.

So yeah, for me there is something very wrong with children who are forced to endure gnawing hunger pangs.

I'd also be concerned if I was you that the other parents know your kids are starving hungry and that's why they all get snacks out when you're near.

I hate the whole snacking thing. I too have friends constantly feeding their kids stuff, mainly crap and it's totally unnecessary. Plus most have overweight kids, it's quite sad. If mine want to snack between meals they can have fruit. Low and behold that's not as appealing as biscuits or crisps or sweets so they generally don't snack and haven't died of hunger thus far on 3 meals a day.