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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Postman trying to open front door?

170 replies

Bumblebee2302 · 13/01/2018 10:33

Postman just tried my (locked) front door handle when an item wouldn't fit in the letterbox. He hadn't even knocked. I could see this happening from the inside and opened the door - I asked him if he was trying to open my door and he said he was only going to leave the item in the inside of the door. I said that I didn't think he should be attempting to open people's doors and he got a bit shirty.

Is this a thing?! I don't know him and he is not a regular postie - in fact, the postmen in this area change frequently. Just made me feel uncomfortable - does your postman/woman do this?

OP posts:

notacooldad · 13/01/2018 20:12

Perfectly normal where I am.
I've often walked downstairs and found a parcel at the bottom. I've no problem with that at all and I'm glad that it happens. The postman hasn't come into a private living space, hasn't interupted me -I work shifts so sometimes I may rest in the middle of the day and made life a little easier.

Sure if he barged in to the living room while we were in the middle of Emmerdale or something I might be annoyed but just leaving a parcel near the front door isn't an issue.

Crumbs1 · 13/01/2018 20:14

Yes perfectly normal here too. We’re very grateful he leaves items on kitchen table, if we’re out.

Jobjobjob · 13/01/2018 20:40

*This thread is hilarious! People getting so uptight about someone trying a door that was locked and no harm was done!

OK there are two lots of people, the solution is so simple:

If you don't want your postie opening the door and popping a parcel in (despite what people say, they don't even enter your house!) - then keep the door locked.

If you are happy for the postie to leave things in your hall/porch/just inside the door - then leave the door unlocked.

There, solved it!*

(PS sometimes, if I know something is due and I'm not going to be in - I leave the door unlocked and... go out...)

^^ this!!

Op you've kept your door locked to keep people out! It worked!! Yippee!!!

If he'd of then kicked the door down or picked the lock then report him...... but he didn't !!! Get over yourself!

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 13/01/2018 22:39

Willow2017 Oh I love it how you’re trying to claim you know all your neighbours are perfectly fine with that, and nobody disagreeing with you lives in a similar area to you.

Aria2015 · 13/01/2018 22:44

Yes, my postman does this. He'll often just open the door and leave the package inside. I don't mind as it saves me a visit to pick up a package. But I do live in a very safe area where we don't lock doors so maybe I have a lax sense of security!

Changeusername · 13/01/2018 23:26

My postman does this which is great. Saves a trip into town. What is not great is the microchip catflap that got broken by a postman shoving things through it 😠

Original poster

Bumblebee2302 · 14/01/2018 07:51

I love that I'm being told to get over myself - twice by the same person - for asking a valid question. All the folks happy to leave their front doors unlocked do realise this invalidates their home insurance, right?

OP posts:

GetShitDone · 14/01/2018 07:57

Really bumblebee? Your door must be locked at all times, even when you are at home, for your insurance to be valid?

CheeseGirl4 · 14/01/2018 08:03

These responses about 'grateful to be saved a trip to the sorting office' are absurd. There is an alternative: he could just KNOCK ON THE DOOR. Presumably you wouldn't have gone out leaving the door open.

The 'you should just lock your door if you don't want it' responses are equally ridiculous; I DO lock my door, but it is not reasonable to expect that someone would walk straight in if I didn't.

GetShitDone · 14/01/2018 08:09

Cheese, the postman wouldn't 'walk straight in' - he wouldn't even cross the threshold! He'd open the door, set the parcel down, and close the door.

That, imo, is entirely reasonable (and normal practice where I live).

I appreciate not everyone lives in a community as safe as this, so I wouldn't tell anyone that feels the need to lock their doors when they are at home that it is 'ridiculous'. I personally get that their circumstances are different to mine.

timeforheroes · 14/01/2018 08:10

Well you've confronted him about it now and obviously expressed your displeasure, so I'm sure it won't happen again.

Our postman has opened our door and left stuff just inside before, it helped me when I was on maternity leave with DTwins and a 2 year old DS, but it was something we spoke about before him doing it. Helped as I didn't need to stop what I was doing.

why12345 · 14/01/2018 08:12

No!! That's weird! If it was a porch fair enough but the door to your house! He shouldn't be doing this!
Does anyone on here not live rurally!! Like just a normal house in a city?!?

Lovesagin · 14/01/2018 08:21

Actual lol at "if you dont want the postman just opening your front door uninvited then don't leave it open"

Err...no, postman, who is only a postman, not in a position of authority, should have appropriate boundaries and know it's not the done thing to just let yourself into someone's home uninvited. Unless agreed obvs.

Funny thread though, people trying to prove how cool and ok they are with this so we all should be.

Please complain op, he needs to know this isn't right at all. He could do it to someone vulnerable and really made them, get himself a baseball bat wrapped round his face, be accused of theft, someones dog could escape. Not right at all.

Lovesagin · 14/01/2018 08:22

Really *scare them

GetShitDone · 14/01/2018 08:28

Laughing at the thought that thinking this is ok is 'trying to be cool'. No, we just live in safer areas or more rural locations where collecting things could mean a 40 mile return journey.

Its about practicality, not 'being cool'.

But I'm yet to be convinced that pushing down on a door handle is a heinous offence!

Lovesagin · 14/01/2018 08:35

Maybe it's safer areas, maybe just different limits as to what's acceptable. Who knows.

Considering our local police are warning residents about people trying door handles to get into people's homes,and encouraging us to report if it happens, I would hazard a guess the police don't like it and perhaps it is an offence. Or certainly something a postman shouldn't be doing.

GetShitDone · 14/01/2018 08:40

Different in different areas then. Our police have never, as far as I'm aware, warned about people trying handles. But then I've not been aware of a burglary for at least a couple of years (there was a small spate of them about 25 miles from me, but they caught the guy responsible). Not been any since. And we would know, it would be headline news in the local paper.

Purplerain101 · 14/01/2018 08:51

Surely it’s weird that he didn’t knock first?! If she hadn’t have answered then fair enough he could have attempted to open the door to leave the parcel. But to not even knock first is just bizarre

Purplerain101 · 14/01/2018 08:53

My bathroom is next to my front door and I usually shower or bathe with the bathroom door open. My parent’s WC is next to their front door and if my dad is away working then my mum does the toilet with the door open as she’s the only one there. Imagine if the postie just strolled in without even knocking. Weird behaviour

notacooldad · 14/01/2018 08:58

Funny thread though, people trying to prove how cool and ok they are with this so we all should be.
Eh? Proving how cool and ok you are because you are fine with your parcel being left in your hall or something?
MN is crazy at times. It's only a parcel that's been dropped off!

Kim82 · 14/01/2018 08:58

Dh is our postman so no problems here. If he’s working in pairs then the guy he’s working with opens our door too - usually to put neighbours parcels in our hallway for them to collect later as they weren’t in. Our hallway regularly looks like a sorting office!

Purplerain101 · 14/01/2018 09:00

@kim but do they not even knock first to see if they can give the parcels to you first before just letting themselves in?

WhatKatyDidnt · 14/01/2018 09:01

I’m just astounded at all these people who leave their front doors unlocked all day!!

Crumbs1 · 14/01/2018 09:04

Our insurance says absolutely nothing about locking the doors, as happens. We’ve had same postman for years, he’s trusted, sensible and checks up on the oldest neighbours. He will collect post from us or drop notes to neighbours. He’s brilliant - why wouldn’t we trust him to pop things on the kitchen table?

notacooldad · 14/01/2018 09:06

I’m just astounded at all these people who leave their front doors unlocked all day!!
Really?
Most people I know have the front door locked unless uts the heavy locks that automatically lock when the door shuts.
Maybe a regional thing?

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