This is ridiculous

[cuddly61]

So I vet already posted about my o/h family coming to stay and wanting us to buy their preferred brand of food.
So the O/h went to collect their aunt. Came back with shopping he had brought for his aunt to have while here. Even tins of baked beans which we have already in the food cupboard,but my brand wasn’t the right brand apparently.i don’t buy cheap baked beans it’s like like my beans are a supermarket own brand. And my o/ h had brought the brand of bread his aunt prefers. So the bread I had brought didn’t get eaten and had to throw it out . So I was getting really irked by this.
Now as we all mostly have I have storage jars for tea coffee and sugar on my worktop. But the tea bags that was already in the storage jar was not his aunts preferred brand and he got the ones that was out of the food cupboard,as these was his aunts preferred brand .but I have like a system where food etc brought first gets used first if you understand what I mean. But I find it ridiculous to go and be a guest in someone’s house and want different brands of food.its a wonder my cheap loo rolls suited his aunt lol.
I made no attempt to buy her preferred brands I told my o/ h his aunt would have to eat what we already had in then he went and brought her preferred brands .i was trying to make a stance on this.
But honestly can I ask would you go and be a guest in someone’s house and ask for a certain brand of food,even baked beans and tea bags . Ok if I’m offered coffee in someone’s house I do ask what brand only because if it’s a supermarkets own I know I won’t be able to drink it so then I can just ask for a cup of tea ,but I do try to see what coffe my host has so I don’t have to ask but I would never say I want a certain brand of coffee and expect them to go out and buy it. Normally at home I drink decaf coffee but I wouldn’t go and stay with his relatives and ask them to buy decaf for me . Sorry but I find all this rather rude .i was brought up that when a guest in someone’s house you either eat what is given to you or if you don’t like it either just leave it on your plate or politely decline .

One time when this aunt stayed she came shopping with me we was having a salad for tea she asked if I had this certain brand salad creme I said no so she picked up the brand she wanted oh she didn’t pay for it either I had to.

Lol I don’t ask everytime the only reason I have to ask because if it’s a strong coffee it makes me go light headed hence why I drink decaf at home. And normally yes I would go out my way to welcome guests but we are not just talking about one certain product here I could understand that ,they have no allergies etc but it’s everything they want different,bread,margarine,tea,to name a few . I don’t have that much spare money to go buying expensive food items. I’m the type to buy what is on offer. And to be honest I’ve never had guests before that demand all these certain brands. Once we was out with my partners relative.a teenager son of one of these aunts.he said he was hungry so I offered to buy him some sandwiches .” Oh no I don’t want them I only eat sandwiches from marks and Spencer’s “ hmmmm told him to go hungry then.

Well one time partners other aunt did do just that rang before she came asking if we had a certain brand margarine as she only eats that.

OH, you are making such a big deal of this. She's clearly has her own ways, annoying indeed, but you can bet someone who knows you well could point something very annoying about you too.

Clearly it was rude of her to expect you to pay for the salad sauce, if indeed, she didn't offer and didn't just forget, but it sounds like it is exactly why your OH decided to pick her up and take her shopping so that HE would pay. Still you're not happy and then gave him a hard time, having a tantrum because she should have no choice but to eat YOUR food.

If I was your OH, I would make it clear that from now on, I'd go and visit her as clearly you are not prepare to make the smallest effort to welcome one of his family member.

Maybe I should write a post about how everytime my parents visits, my dad's wife waits for me to be out of the kitchen to rearrange it all. Then she will fold all our washing, getting who's who so I'll have to do it again, then she will leave all the doors opened even though we've explained that we keep them closed to keep the warmth in. I could go on, but I accept that's how she is and she means well. I'm just glad when they go back home!!

Thanks for all your replies .guess I’m just not use to it. I try and answer some of your comments. Yes it is my partner who bought this extra food this time.but if I’m short of money one week for our food he won’t pay towards it. But hey he pays for this stuff for his aunt.
When his relatives are due to stay he doesn’t help at all getting things ready,ok he doesn’t do anything to help me .i have mobility problems and all the extra works makes these worse. By the way he doesn’t work sits at home all day.
I wrote certain brands because I’m not sure if I’m allowed to name brands on here.
And yes I get annoyed these relatives don’t ask to stay they just ring up saying they are coming to stay .
Once two had said they was coming so I got stuff in .then turned up with a extra person not even letting me know.yet knew I had only one guest bed and my sofas are only two seaters . Also I should explain I have mental illness and I don’t cope well with having a house full .
Even when I’ve explained to my partner sometimes look my mental health is bad could you just put your relatives off for a while he refuses.
I feel like they take my house over. They get the tv remote and hog it all evening . Dammed annoying when I’m in the middle of watching something and the channel changes.
Guess I’m just not use to it.my ex,s family when they came to stay wasn’t like this. They contributed to the food even though I never asked then to.
And I remember as a child even if my parents was invited to tea mum always took a cake or something that’s how I was brought up

If you go to somebody else's home and expect to be fed and watered, you eat and drink what the hell (except in the case of allergies and intolerances) you are given and are grateful for it.

I think it's nice to get in what you know people like, even if it's not your first choice. I certainly feel thought about when people get me my favourites, but I'd never expect it.

I guessed it was more than just the aunt liking her own brands. At the end of the day,it's your home,your space,and so it's not ok,for them Or anybody to just invite themselves around whenever. I'm sure you love your partner,but he has to understand that they can only stay,IF and WHEN you say it's convenient. If he doesn't like this notion,and continuously wants his family around at the drop of a hat,he could find his own place,where everybody concerned would be happy

I'm confused by the importance of baked beans here. if I was going to stay at someone's house the very last thing I would think is that baked beans are such an important and special part of my daily diet that I need to bring my own fucking brand. Adults with the attitude of toddlers. She should grow up and eat what her hosts have kindly provided.

When my Mum visits I get the type of bread and tea and milk she likes, when my husband's family visit I ask what they like to eat and drink. When I have friends staying I ask for any preferences. It's common courtesy I think to treat your guests well.

I'm sensing you're not too keen on the aunt OP.

So he doesn’t work, sits at home hogging the tv. You pay for his cigarettes etc and the house which is yours. His family refuse to eat your food and expect you to do extra shopping for them and he doesn’t help prepare the house for them ?
Sorry op but why are you still with this man ? I’d have shown him the door by now.

YABU. And the word is BOUGHT, not brought.

That's so annoying. As much as he has a right to buy stuff for his house, he should have sided with you on this as you had to waste food for it.

And beans are beans fgs.

You need to say no...they can't stay there again. It's your house, stand up for yourself. Tell your boyfriend that you're not running a hotel or hostel. I'd get rid of him too tbh.

Would all of the grammar police please fuck off to pedants corner.
It's not clever.
It's not funny and it makes you look a dick.

Grab yourself a piece of paper and write down what joys he brings to your life.

If it takes you more than 2 seconds to start writing, maybe you need to consider taking back your keys and settling into a more enjoyable, single life!

He really does sound selfish, uncaring and as though he is using you and your home at very little cost to himself!

It's not grammar, it's spelling.

Would all of the grammar police please fuck off to pedants corner.
It's not clever.
It's not funny and it makes you look a dick.
Agreed.

OP, you need to start by putting your foot down and insisting that you have no visitors if you are not up to it. It sounds like your OH and his relatives ride roughshod over you.

It's not grammar, it's spelling It's annoying!

So is people using the entirely wrong word.

peppa
The words are spelt properly just not used grammar appropriately.
That's grammar not spelling.

Sorry just saw it's not his house. Even more so he's BU.

I think it is rude if aunt is stating a preference and indicating that food should be altered but OK (and quite kind) if your husband is doing it because he wants to be extra hospitable because he knows her preferences. I have to say that I wouldn't buy special stuff in my house! (altho I do buy special milk for MIL if I remember).
I hope your DH is not setting a precedent that he regrets.

sorry, DP