Not to role play with my children?

[Tinseltower]

I don’t know why but I really really dislike playing. The type where you play with figures or cars etc or even mums and dads style playing. I’ll happily play other things with them like board games or hide and seek or do things with them like baking.

I feel guilty as by middle child always asks and I deflect him into something else or suggest something I like.

Am I harming them by not playing with them?

My mum never role-played with me but she did read to me. I wouldn't have the faintest idea where to start role-playing but ask me to build lego or something and I'm sorted. I just don't have the imagination to be creative like that - all my imagination is linked in some way to things I've read / seen etc and then expanded on. And there's a lot of repetition in it & transferring ideas. It's not suited to making up stories and games with children. But then I'm autistic and I wonder if my mum might be on the spectrum somewhere (my dad is).
As long as you interact in some way with them I can't see the problem.

The minute you start quoting the bible you lose the argument cos the bible gets everything right!

Lethal - I presume Paul didn't mean role playing with your children when he wrote that so it's not completely relevant anyway, but it always pops into my head when I hear about adults playing like children so I couldn't resist it.

The mums and dads style roleplay I find much easier than the little figures/plastic animals/ barbies.
Youngest dd still likes me to play with her which usually involves her bringing me toy food on a plate and me pretending to eat it or babysit her baby and change its outfits etc.

You mean you don't have The Terrible Bum Biting Monster? 😱

Nobody ever played with me 😪

I think if more adults had the light heartedness and playfulness of children the world would be a better place. So what some beardy old man wrote in the bible thousands of years ago does not resonate with me at all

Oh I'd play hospitals for ages.

"Yes, I am very poorly and must stay on bed rest (lying on sofa under duvet)"

And I will tolerate slightly warm greying smartie 'pills' for the pleasure.

Or shops as long as I was allowed to occasionally rob the shop for the ELC notes in the till.

WashingMatilda

*I am the same. I physically dread it.

I would rather learn times tables*

Goodness gracious

You don’t think times tables are fun?

MothertotheLordsofmisrule

I’m going to get DS into hospital role play. Genius! puts biscuits into first aid box in preparation

Most people don’t really enjoy playing make believe with their kids but you just have to suck it up and pretend you do

Bollocks to that. The mummy martyrs can if they like, but nobody has to. I play games and have all kinds of fun with my children, but there are particular bits I don't enjoy and so don't do. They go to creche and school and have each other and friends and cousins, nobody is missing out just because I wont pretend I'm a fucking cat!

If you want to do it, do it. But don't try and guilt trip and judge other women for not doing it.

I agree with Aspieparent.

It is about learning just as much as it is playing.

Of course our DC watch us and mimic us but I think role play can be excellent for playing out a scene that could represent something new in your DC's life; or how to handle certain social situations.

For example - new baby on the way.. how to try and not react with agression if another friend snatches or hurts you.. I guess it isn't vital but I certainly think it is an engaging way to teach your DC.

I didn't like playing role play even as a child! I remember standing in the playground while we were playing some interminable game of doctors and nurses or whatever just thinking 'this is so boring'. I did play imaginatively, on my own, with my dolls, but role-play didn't seem very interesting to me then.

I am the same I get so bored playing with toys! I do try and do a little bit each day (I am a SAHM) but fill our day with other activities instead so I’m still having fun with him.
Such as

• going to the park
• going to playgroups
• visiting friends with kids (he is so good at playing with other kids and I get to have a brew with their mum!)
• independent supervised play (which he actually prefers)
• baking and cooking
• play doh and crafts, colouring etc
• reading (we can spend hours reading together)
• soft play
• swimming
• ‘wild hour’ - dancing around the house and running round like lunatics

All which I love!
So I don’t feel any guilt about finding toy playing so dull! My OH is fab at it though, he prefers to stay in when he’s on duty but I much prefer us being out and about at a playgroup or whatever, he’s an extremely sociable child so I must be doing something right.
YANBU at all xx

I am on a break from playing trolls and pj masks right now. I don't always love it but they are only little once and I don't like the thought of them being disappointed. I remember when my dad would play she ra with me and I loved it.
It's nice to make the effort with your kids

Me too! I thought I was the only one my dh is brilliant at that kind if play but it's like my imagination shuts down.Im good at the reading,drawing creative type interaction though

Very, very rarely. I loved my sindies and ponies as a kid and made up massively complicated games that lasted days. I'd have hated my mum to get involved. I've tried playing with Dd, but all she wants to do is make them go for walks or talk about parties. No kidnapping, mountain climbing, fairies or anything. Ds prefers to do his own thing.

I'm better at telling them stories and teaching them sarcasm.I'm also good at suggesting narrative arcs for their games. To be fair, I'm mainly in work.

I had this. My children are older now so it’s not as much of an issue, although Lego still happens but they normally play with each other.

My tips:
Don’t feel bad about dreading it- I’d say most parents do!
Just do it for 15 mins a day if you really feel it’s important. Better than nothing!
I took the radio in with me and a cup of tea to make it more bearable!

We aren't all mummy martyrs. I hate role play and struggle with it but ds with development delay has to have role play to learn. He does no role play at all at nursery as he struggles with children so I have to do alot of it at home with him. We play games as well and go out.

Peppapig I’m no mummy martyr but I think sometimes you do have to grit your teeth and do stuff you don’t enjoy for your kids. Your post implies your have more than one child? I think if your child has siblings close in age you can opt out of this bit of parenting more easily. If you have an only like I do you either get on with it or they never get to play what they want at home which imo is unfair.

I’m no mummy martyr but I think sometimes you do have to grit your teeth and do stuff you don’t enjoy for your kids

and sometimes you don't.

@lynmilne65 we have the bum pinching monster

The doctor one is really good as the patient gets to lie on the settee for most of it.

Yeah my dad - then a nurse - was a dad hand at this ruse as a small child I'd happily spend hours putting bandages on him while he lazed on the sofa after a shift.

I don't grit my teeth and play games I don't want to. I DO spend time doing things with them that I don't mind doing....but it's not really a good message for them is it? To always have me at their beck and call.

Of course I have to do SOME things I don't enjoy such as taking them to parties and chatting with other parents.....I hate that but know it's polite and so do it.

My parents never role played with me. That was fine: I did it with siblings and cousins and friends and also lovers but a rather different kind of role play. But to be honest I spent most of my childhood and adolescence in some imaginary world one way or another.

My eldest three loved dressing up and massive playmobile epics and anything imaginative really. I joined in with enthusiasm when requested. DC4 is totally uninterested in that kind of thing though; he thinks pretending to be someone else or making little plastic people talk is a bit silly. It takes all sorts.