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Original poster

To want to keep my vibrators under the bed?!

63 replies

NotForSale · 01/01/2018 07:42

Where do you keep yours?
My kids have discovered a love of playing hide and seek, their favourite place being under my bed.. its only a matter of time before they look in that box!
Cant keep in bedside drawers as nosey children rumage in there too.

If you've found this page in your search of how to store sex toys at home and for travel, you might find our guide to the best sex toy storage useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

OP posts:
ChickenVindaloo2 · 01/01/2018 08:32
Bluelonerose · 01/01/2018 08:34

Under my bed.
However I have an of German bed which I struggle to lift so kids have got no chance.

Children aren't allowed in my room anyway.

BattleCuntGalactica · 01/01/2018 08:46

In a tall square rotating glass cabinet, under a giant discoball. It makes a spectacular centrepiece for coffee mornings.

ComedyofTerrors · 01/01/2018 08:47

Mine are all locked in the dominance dungeon

JaneEyre70 · 01/01/2018 09:01

We converted our spare room into a Christian Grey modelled playroom. It's great to see visitors faces when we show them in though it's a full time job keeping the butt plugs so shiny for display purposes.

differentnameforthis · 01/01/2018 09:32

This is clearly a perv guys.
Her 2nd post screams perv to me

Op has a posting history going back to 2013. Maybe check before you shout troll perv?

Indigo911 · 01/01/2018 09:39

I keep mine inside the sleeve of a top I hardly ever wear underneath lots of other clothes in my chest of drawer

WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 01/01/2018 09:50

You could ban your kids from playing in your room?
You could keep the toys in a bedside drawer?
You could keep the toys under the bed but ban your kids from rummaging in your stuff?

WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 01/01/2018 09:51

That was meant to read "You could keep the toys in a box under the bed and ban your kids from rummaging in your stuff?

Thursdaydreaming · 01/01/2018 10:09

Get the fancy ones that you can leave on display, they look like some modern art.

BattleCuntGalactica · 01/01/2018 10:16

I’m sure you’d have a hard time explaining an ovipositor sextoy away to most adults, never mind any kids that found one.

To want to keep my vibrators under the bed?!
Branleuse · 01/01/2018 10:35

is it bad that I went "oooh an ovipositor" before even reading it.

ChickenVindaloo2 · 01/01/2018 10:37

I thought I'd heard it all.
My internet history is awful due to MN!!!

BulletFox · 01/01/2018 10:45

Battle Grin

A friend posted me one as a joke a few months ago. Whilst I was selling the house I kept moving it nervously then getting worried I'd left it out for a viewing. Think it's in a cardboard box somewhere now.

OP in a paper bag under the bed is ok.

Wow it's like the gimp forum this morning! 'Come into my sex lair, my little pretty one...'

lynmilne65 · 01/01/2018 10:49

One Christmas in front of EVERYBODY I unwrapped a huge black dildo which immediately started to pulsate 😳😳😳

ChickenVindaloo2 · 01/01/2018 10:51

I genuinely honestly thought I had heard of most stuff but I'm now wondering what the hell else there is that I've not heard of. in case I might enjoy some of it

CIssieB · 01/01/2018 11:00

Why does that Ovipositer have boiled sweets stuck to it. ?

BattleCuntGalactica · 01/01/2018 11:12

I'm SO GLAD I'm not the only one who knows what an ovipositor is hahaha

@CIssieB they're eggs. You use the toy to stick the pretend eggs inside you. It's a fetish apparently. They're made out of gelatine if I recall correctly. Sextoys have gotten weirder with the rise of technology.

I mean Bad Dragon has many many examples. VERY NSFW.

purpleprincess24 · 01/01/2018 11:13

My Mum used to clean for me, one day I came home and she announced ‘I’ve given your bedroom a good clean INCLUDING the top of your wardrobe’ Sex toys were there in a bin bag, I was mortified

Oldraver · 01/01/2018 11:17

Mine are in an old vanity case with a combination lock, which is my birthday..OH has stopped asking what the combination is Grin

BattleCuntGalactica · 01/01/2018 11:19

Okay this is my fave thread of the day!

mustbemad17 · 01/01/2018 11:21

Surely the bedroom is the wrong place for them? Far too obvious. Personally my collection is in the TV cabinet in the lounge. So far nobody has discovered it...

Fluffyears · 01/01/2018 11:41

Just say there are unicorn horns as unicorns are acceptable everywhere

smurfy2015 · 01/01/2018 12:42

During my last house move my MIL was working away packing stuff, my heart sank when I realized she had packed up the 2nd drawer from the bottom of the 8 drawer chest of drawers as I hadn't been ready for us to start that room yet but I had a crew of helpers so was busy.

It wasn't hidden in any bags or anything but when I found it after moving with no mention ever then or since (apart from you might want to look at that bag) there was an old tee shirts which she wrapped all up in, then put spare wrapping paper around and put into a bag for life to keep it all safe and away from others prying eyes.

mustbemad17 · 01/01/2018 12:51

A friend of mine kept her toys under her bed in a box...her daughter once produced it & tipped the entire contents onto the lounge floor in front of very important guests