To try and defer DS entry to Reception?

[lookingforthecorkscrew]

DS (3) was born on August 31st, he currently attends a nursery attached to a primary school where there have been issues about his listening and interaction (or lack of) with other children for his 15 hours. We’ve been actively involved and on board with all the referrals the school have suggested: EP, SALT, SEN Action (and more!). DS loves nursery and we’ve definitely all seen a marked improvement in his language and ability to follow instructions since September.

But we are moving 80 miles away in the spring and have to start making some decisions about where we go from here. My preference is to place him in a private nursery for 3-4 morning sessions a week. He loves nursery and its just been so good for him. We’d have to make a late application for primary school - which isn’t terrible in that area as many good schools are undersubscribed. I’d then contact the local schools to request deferral of Reception start to Sept ‘19.

I know this isn’t by any means guaranteed, but I think with his DOB and SEN evidence we will have a strong case for him remaining in nursery for a further year.

The worst case is that they all refuse and we either have to put him in Reception in September, or have him start in Year 1 the following year.

Certain family members have been quite opinionated about all this, with many suggesting that we are making the wrong decision for DS, potentially damaging his chances in life! (I know)

We will, of course, pursue the SEN referrals once we’re settled too, it’s possible he has ASD but as we haven’t had a firm diagnosis yet I am wary of labelling him thus.

AIBU to ‘hold him back’? Has anyone experienced similar?

My dd birthday is 29th August and so we had the same dilemma. However she was very ‘ready’ for it in a lot of ways. She has struggled, but no more than lots of other kids.
So to answer your question, I think you know your child the best. If you think he would benefit from another year at nursery, then do it. But I would try and leave the decision as late a I could so that you can be sure. Good luck.

That’s the thing, neither DH or I think he’s ready for it in the slightest, in fact it’s like an alarm ringing in my head ‘He’s not ready, he’s not ready’ - he is definitely a good 6 months behind many of his similarly aged peers.

I haven't experienced SEN but I've worried a lot about DS starting reception with his year group. He's also 3 with a mid august birthday. He's been at nursery since he was 2 and loves it. He's come on loads. I think he's quite bright but socially there's a big difference between him and the older children. I've applied for his school place starting September '18 and am just hoping for the best.

In your position I think I'd try to defer and establish what additional needs he has before hand.

You're definitely doing the right thing especially given your DS's SEN. Friends of mine have done this with August children - unfortunately having to fight it once they started school and were clearly too young - and they are now in the right years and enjoying school. One friend didn't and her DS is miserable.

In Scotland there is leeway with a couple of months (the cut off date is the end of February) and a lot of January and February and even December parents start their children late.

You sound very sorted so I would urge you to ignore the naysayers as you may need your energy to what could be a fight with your new school/education authority. Good luck!

I dad the same with my son. Also August born. I delayed him for a year, so he started Reception just after hs 5th birthday rather than just after his 4th.

It was the best thing we could possibly have done for him. He's now in Year 1, he loves school. He's never going to set the world on fire academically, but he is coping nad enjoys his time there, which is all i think we can ask for!

We are also going down the route of SEN diagnosis. BUt TBH I would have delayed him without the SEN issues, as he simply wasn't ready.

it was very straightforward to do. I apllied for his palce in his "normal" cohort, then contacted the LEA to find out who was in charge of delayed start requests. Spoke to the person, was sent a load of forms, filled them out, sent in supporting evidence. it went to panel, approved straight away. Absolutely no drama. We also got to keep his free hours at nursery as he was under 5 for the whole academic year.

I'd wholehearetedly recommend it.
There's a very good FB group with lots of support. Flexible School for Summerborns, or something similar.

I’m a teacher and I say YANBU. Do it!

DS is bright and loving, but has no interest in children his age. He’s also very self-directed, and doesn’t get the ‘joining in’ element of activities. He’s very gentle and cheerful, no issues with hitting or lashing out.

My understanding, and I might be wrong, is that whilst some primary schools will allow this; secondary schools don't. So, your ds would need to miss a year further along, y6?, which would be detrimental. I think! All I'm saying is check out your local secondary schools policy too.

Flexible school admissions for summer borns is the FB group.

The trouble is, if he doesn't go to Reception he will be straight into Year 1 which would be a shock to the system. I've, personally, never heard of a child going into reception a year late. A good Reception class will have many of the aspects of a Nursery gently moving children on and an experienced Reception teacher (I was one) will be well aware that there is almost a year's difference in age between all the children in the class which is a big gap at that age. Your child would be assessed on entry and if he has SEN these would be taken into account at school.

Unless you have evidence to the contrary, and I accept there may be some unsympathetic Reception teachers out there, I think he'd be better off going to Reception where they will take all his needs into account and move on from there.

I think with potential sen the right support and early help is important which depending on the child may or may not mean school.

I can hear him upstairs asking his dad to show him ‘blue colours’ on the computer and it’s breakimy my heart a bit. 💔

You say that glamourousgrandmother but I was a summerborn too, and my mum held me back until the term I turned 5 (so I effectively missed the first two terms of reception). It was the right decision for me.

You absolutely can request deferral of Reception start, and there have been many successful cases in recent years.

My experience is that if you can defer, you should do it. It gives the child many advantages when they are not quite ready.

While you can request it, and while I can totally see why you’d want to, I’ve never heard of a school agreeing to it. There is always homeschooling as an option if they don’t though.

I should also point out that the area we are moving to still has the 11+, so our thinking about his deferral has to reach pretty far into his future!

Check the LA criteria carefully. Some LAs will allow you to defer for a year, others insist you have to start the child in Year 1. I wouldn't recommend this as the curriculum.becomes much more formal in year 1 and I think most children would find it a difficult transition if they went straight into Y1. Also as PP mentioned, check the criteria for secondary entry. You wouldn't want to be in a situation where he has to move directly from Y5 to Y7.

My son has an August 31st birthday and he says that it never made any difference to him except being the youngest in the whole school at primary and secondary for one year each and now being the youngest at university.

lookingforthecorkscrew That might have been in the days of three point entry to Reception, now I think all children start in September so this option might not be available. Starting mid way through the year might also be more difficult as the class is already established, friendships formed etc.

I suppose it depends on the school and the teacher but I used to have children who could be assessed as being at a 22month old level on Development Matters so I treated them as being at that level but they integrated well into the reception class.

I’ve been in touch with the LA and they were generally pretty positive about it, though of course it’s at the discretion of the head teachers of the individual schools.

Yes but glamourousgrandmother what I’m trying to say to you is that deferrals for summerborns are a thing now, this is possible.

And I’m an academically successful, well adjusted summerborn too PersianCatLady but I didn’t have speech and language delay or additional needs...

Hold him back if you can

I thought the government was going to allow this option now for summer born children (April/May/June/July/August born) and that they would then have a choice about going into Reception or Year 1 the following year. Has it not come in yet? I remember reading articles about it and thinking it was long, long overdue as a policy.

Good luck, OP.

We've done it for our 19th August DS. Mild speech delay but otherwise no SEN, we just know he is nowhere near ready. Here the LEA have authorised it and guaranteed he will remain with his adopted cohort throughout. We didn't need to get any schools to agree.

In your position I'd pull out all of the stops to delay reception entry for a year.