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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you shouldn't be allowed in to the theatre 30 mins late?

133 replies

MardyMarie · 29/12/2017 22:48

I took my DC to the panto today. There were two seats empty on our row and I knew it was fully booked so I waited 15 mins before getting new born DS to sleep; presuming the theatre wouldn't let people in any later and that those people may have been poorly. However, half an hour in a man and his son arrive and ask me to move to let them in. I asked him to go to the other side of the row as DS was sleeping but he kept talking and woke him anyway, before squeezing past and knocking my DDs popcorn out of her hands.

AIBU to think the theatre shouldn't have let him in that late as it's disruptive to both the audience and the performers? Fortunately I got DS back to sleep but that man disturbing us could have resulted in us having to leave.

OP posts:
BishopstonFaffing · 30/12/2017 08:42

I went to a show the other day and some people near us decided that the empty box would be much more fun to sit in than their seats. And they got kicked out and sent back to their seats. Complaining loudly. They then repeated this twice. Twats.

Whatsinanameanyway201 · 30/12/2017 08:43

YABVU!
Taking a newborn to a panto can be much more disruptive than arriving late. Don't be so selfish. You have no idea at all why they were late. You sound like a bloody nightmare

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 30/12/2017 08:54

The panto is a bit different but I agree generally that latecomers shouldn’t be let in until a suitable moment - perhaps the interval. It even irritates me during the cinema, never mind a theatre performance I’ve paid £££ for.

Just be organised enough to arrive on time!

Babbitywabbit · 30/12/2017 08:55

Jacques- I think people are more surprised that a newborn baby would wake up simply by the mother standing up!

CocaColaTruck · 30/12/2017 08:58

The normal form is for an usher to escort latecomers to the end or the row when there is a suitable break in the proceedings. Some theatres don't allow latecomers to take their seats until the interval, they have to stand at the back until then.

DeepanKrispanEven · 30/12/2017 09:01

Panto tickets aren't cheap and if your train is late, are you supposed to tell your children they'll have to miss the entire performance?

It wouldn't work like that. Theatres that operate rules about latecomers either let ask them to stand at the back or provide an area where the show is on screen until a convenient moment for them to enter.

Midnitescribbler and Babbitywabbit, if you read the OP's posts you will see that in fact the latecomers would have disturbed fewer people had they come in from the other direction.

JacquesHammer · 30/12/2017 09:15

You have no idea at all why they were late

To be fair the reason anyone is late isn't the problem of other theatre goers.

Panto I would expect to be a little more flexible but I have had productions ruined by latecomers, the worst arguing from the door very loudly until the show had to be paused and them escorted away

juliesaway · 30/12/2017 09:17

People taking newborns to theatre. I’ve heard of family friendly but really.

k2p2k2tog · 30/12/2017 09:20

Rules at pantos are different - it's much more relaxed. We're going to see the Nutcracker next week and would expect people who are late to have to wait to the interval to get in as it's so disruptive.

So many poor time keepers on this thread. Puntuality is important.

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 30/12/2017 09:21

I've worked in theatres, on and off, for nearly 30 years.

It is incredibly disrespectful to the actors to arrive very late and expect to be let in. Most theatres will not allow entry if you're more than 5 minutes late until suitable break, such as the interval or a scene change if there is one. This is still the case if it's a local panto rather than a big name west end number. The actors will have been working incredibly hard, for weeks if not months, on the production. It is physically hard work and mentally tasking in terms of remembering lines, songs and dances. They will often be doing multiple performances a day, usually with only 1 day off a week, if that. In the case of local performances, many of the performers will also have a day job or be at school. The least you can do is turn up on time!

OTOH, I wouldn't bat an eyelid at a baby being brought along to a family show. We'd expect then to be taken out if they cried a lot - but we'd also expect that of a tantrumming 4 year old, or a restless 8 year old who won't stay in their seat. Or a drunk, disruptive adult (happens!)

Just turn up on time, sit reasonably quietly and still, and let them entertain you. It's not a big ask, surely?

Wilburissomepig · 30/12/2017 09:26

For panto, it's fine. Would have caused the same amount of 'disruption' if they'd gone to the toilet. Children are much easier to walk past than adults, though they should have replaced your DD's popcorn. YABU.

JacquesHammer · 30/12/2017 09:30

People taking newborns to theatre. I’ve heard of family friendly but really

Rather people taking newborns to panto where they sell babies in arms tickets and it is a relaxed atmosphere.

It's hardly taking a newborn to the full Ring Cycle

MidniteScribbler · 30/12/2017 09:48

Midnitescribbler and Babbitywabbit, if you read the OP's posts you will see that in fact the latecomers would have disturbed fewer people had they come in from the other direction.

It was the OP causing the extra disruption by arguing about which end people enter from. If she'd just stood up for a split second, no words need to even have been exchanged apart from the initial 'excuse me'. She was the one creating the fuss.

Devilishpyjamas · 30/12/2017 09:48

There’s nothing wrong with people talking newborns to the panto. It wouldn’t be appropriate to take them to a serious play but panto is different. But likewise you expect more movement around the theatre during panto than you would in a serious play.

bastardkitty · 30/12/2017 09:52

Haven't read the thread but just to say I cannot see the issue with taking a newborn to the theatre. They are quuet and very portable at that age, assuming you would leave if the baby cried. I don't think you were unreasonable to expect them to go tothe other side.

SemolinaSilkpaws · 30/12/2017 09:55

How does the OP know the couple of adults the other end of the row didn’t have problems standing up easily?

If I had been the latecomers and been argued with my bladder would have become incredibly weak necessitating lots of visits to the toilets and needing to get past regularly but then I am horrible that way.

bastardkitty · 30/12/2017 09:59

Yes that sounds like a pretty accurate self-assessment

bruffin · 30/12/2017 10:28

How would they have got to the other end of the row? It usually means traipsing all the way round the theatre, and probably disturbing far more people.
Theatres are usually pretty good at getting people in at the right end of the aisle nearest their seats.

JacquesHammer · 30/12/2017 10:58

If I had been the latecomers and been argued with my bladder would have become incredibly weak necessitating lots of visits to the toilets and needing to get past regularly but then I am horrible that way

And how lucky the rest of the folk in the immediate area would be to be collateral damage in that.

SemolinaSilkpaws · 30/12/2017 11:47

JacquesHammer as I would rather sew my butt cheeks together and then enter a vindaloo eating competition than go to a pantomime other ‘folk’ will not be disturbed by me.

I do a very good toothsucking mutter at serious theatre when disturbed however.

Gingernaut · 30/12/2017 11:52

I love latecomer shaming by whoever's on stage.

Al Murray, Jimmy Carr and Dame Edna Everage do/did this very well.

I went to see Blue Man Group on Thursday night.

A trio of latecomers ended up being screened as they were filmed walking to their seats, on the huge LED boards with klaxons and LATE ARRIVALS being flashed across the screens.

manicinsomniac · 30/12/2017 12:53

At our large (1000 seat) theatre there is a sort of cupboard under the circle for latecomers

Grin

That's actually a really good, practical solution but it sounds like some kind of Harry Potter-esque punishment/torture chamber for their lateness.

DeepanKrispanEven · 30/12/2017 13:45

If I had been the latecomers and been argued with my bladder would have become incredibly weak necessitating lots of visits to the toilets and needing to get past regularly but then I am horrible that way.

So you'd waste your ticket money and miss half the play just to spite another theatregoer? Lovely.

Devilishpyjamas · 30/12/2017 15:31

It’s a bit bizarre manic. It has bar stools and a sort of window sized hole to look through. You can’t see high up special effects but they were at sort of eye level with my son on the stage so were delighted with the arrangement! Better than the standing at the back of the upper circle tickets the company originally offered them!

But apparently it is used a lot for latecomers and seemed a good solution to me.

Mishappening · 30/12/2017 15:37

When our children were small we missed so many things that we would have loved to go to because we were not prepared to disrupt anyone else's enjoyment. I get very annoyed when others do not have the grace to be equally considerate. Every year my DDs and I all go to the cathedral to hear the beautiful carols and there is always some idiot who brings a babe in arms or in a pushchair. Inevitably they wake up and ruin the carols, the cathedral acoustic being perfect for their screams. Grrr.

I understand that a panto is generally a bit more noisy and informal anyway, but it still seems odd to take a wee baby.