To ask you to share your childbirth experiences?

[xoguineas]

First time mum due on the 18th Jan and would love to hear all the good, bad and gory details

First baby. Got a sweep Tuesday afternoon. Wednesday at 5am waters broke. In labour for 18.5 hours. Got an epidural BEST THING EVER, the pain was unbearable up until then. Natural birth in hospital, had to be cut, healing that cut was a bitch, it hurt so bad. Beautiful ds born 8lb5.

I spoke to my midwife about assisted birth and she said usually forceps is in theatre and after you have consented to a section so they can just move right on if it doesn't seem to be working. The thought of forceps absolutely terrifies me though!

I wonder if they were thinking I might need a section..though surely they would have mentioned that. I am also now wondering why they needed to use the forceps actually, as they only let me push once beore deciding to use them..never have questioned this until now

Forceps scared the shit out of me..i was terrified they would need to use them again with DS but luckily my labour with him was comletely smooth except for the huge bloodloss.

Started off on the Friday. Finally got into labour on the Saturday night after 2 failed attempts. Had epidural snored all the way through my contractions.
Only dilated to 1.5cm, and had high blood pressure so taken to theatre and given an
Emergency C/section. (Sunday)

Pretty steady pregnancy until the last trimester. In early days typically tired but very little morning sickness and quickly found out the triggers to avoid it.

Had one occasion of bleeding in 2nd trimester which scared the life out of me so hospital trip and monitoring. They couldn't or didn't explain the reason for it but all was fine and I got a lovely dose of rhesus d in my ass(can't remember if that what its called)

Can't remember exact time but had a standard midwife check around 32 weeks and showed signs of pre-eclamsia would have thought my swelling feet would have gave me a clue too so had to have another midwife visit to keep an eye on it a week or so later she sent me hospital who sent me away with a prescription of something or other along with my baby elephant feet.

Another week or so midwife sent me back again and I didn't leave until I had dc induced at 35 + 5. The nurses commented at the hospital that I didn't appear as unwell as my tests indicated so small blessing I suppose.

Induced labour which wasn't pleasant, for all the books I read they didn't help me during labour as any knowledge about what was happening went out the window while they pumped me with diamorphine love it and hate it, my dc they eventually discovered was back to back, so essentially stuck in the birth canal lovely thought. Off to theatre for epidural type thing and forceps delivery.
Tiny dd was born 5 pounds 3oz.

I've been quite light hearted about it up there but the I didn't take well to being in hospital aduring a heat wave for nigh on two weeks, mine and my dc health was in their hands and control and I had none of it. I was packing my bags still with a catheter in everyday for a few days to leave before I clicked they were not going to allow it/ satisfied me and dc were healthy.

batshite

Something I have noticed reading a few of these stories is that a few people have been told they might be taken to theatre for forceps. I had a forceps delivery, but this was just done in the normal delivery room, is this not usual? I guess I never questioned it before..

I had forceps delivery in a theatre, I reckon it depends entirely on circumstances of the Labour and how it's progressed/affects baby. I was told if I didn't get dc out In two pushes with forceps then it would be a csection for me so I suppose being in theatre with everyone prepped to do it made sense.

My top tip - if breastfeeding doesn't work, don't beat yourself up. There are loads of ways to be good parents. Medics won't encourage you to stop (I think perhaps they're not allowed to?), but if you make that decision then they won't judge you for it

I had the total opposite to this. I desperately wanted to breastfeed. But the midwives/hospital staff scared me into bottlefeeding . They kept telling me that DD was starving and it was important to know she was getting enough and such. I found out afterwards that babies can survive on very very little especially in the first few days. It was the midwife who visited me at home who told me this. I have since concluded that the hospital midwives were too busy to help me properly and it was easier for them to keep tabs on what was going into baby if there was proof of what she was taking. Ended up spending months and months visiting lactation consultants, taking a shitload of domperidone, pumping round the clock to try and get supply up enough to BF..after missing out on those first few days.

Son latchwd perfectly right after birth and I had no issues at all with BFing him.

My tuppence worth :

DS was EMCS. Arrived at hospital, was already 5cms. Checked cervix, discovered he was breech there and then. Offered me a section or to try for a vaginal birth - I picked a section. It was fine, recovery was fine, no problems at all.

DD was a ELCS as I had had one before, and she was also breech, but knew she was breech all along. Didn't fancy a VBAC tbh. Second section went well, healed better and was even on my feet quicker than with DS (probably because I had crazy DS to run around after too!)

Both babies were breech due to heart shaped uterus.

First baby, 15 years ago. Pretty easy going pregnancy and birth. Seven days overdue, absolutely average labour, around 12 hours with only gas and air. No stitches. Worst part for me, as an 18 year old, was I gained 4 stone.

Second baby born 8 weeks ago. Rough pregnancy as I was struggling with anxiety, had several bleeds throughout, landed in hospital with a blood clot in my leg at one point and vomited about 20 times a day from the second trimester. Went into labour at 37 weeks, baby was born within 3 hours of my first contraction. Had to have some help with forceps though as baby was in distress. Gas and air only as there was no time for anything else. Stitches are a bitch

Only similarity was that my first sign of labour both times was having the 'show'. My first labour, I had a constant ache in my back and no contractions as such. Second labour, contractions were hard and fast pretty much straight away.

Something I have noticed reading a few of these stories is that a few people have been told they might be taken to theatre for forceps. I had a forceps delivery, but this was just done in the normal delivery room, is this not usual? I guess I never questioned it before

There's two reasons for this - either for analgesia (a spinal) because there is time as baby is not acutely distressed or for trial of instrumental because they cannot be certain they will succeed and may need to revert to c/s.

My first was an induction. I had two lots of the pessary and was cramping quite badly by around 1900 so was examined and was 4cm. Went round to labour ward, they tried to break the waters but they then realised they had already gone, I had been up and down to the loo thinking I was leaking urine! Asked for gas and air at 2000 and by 2030 had a strong urge to push, was checked and was fully dilated. DD born at 2200.

DS - Started cramping at around 1800. Went out for a long walk and thought by around 2300 things might be happening so rang my parents due to previous quick labour. They came on in and insisted I go on up to hospital but I knew I wasn't really there yet. Took our time and parked far away from maternity so I could walk for a bit. Got in around 0030 and was not dilated at all but the contractions were just properly starting. I convinced them to let me stay for a bit and they reluctantly let me. He was born at 0130.

My third was breech, I went straight up to hospital again when contractions commenced and she was born an hour later, again with no pain relief.

Labour doesn't have to be awful!

Had backache on and off for the few days before but since I was 36 weeks put it down to pregnancy aches and laughed when my work colleagues suggested early labour.
Front waters popped at 6:30am when I bent down to stroke the cat, just a tiny trickle and I thought I had wet myself. Went down stairs to get ready for the day, (I was due to go to the hospital anyway) realised I was still leaking and spent the next half hour googling had my waters gone. Eventually called the hospital and they said come in early before my appointment.
Pain started about 10ish and hospital confirmed waters gone and in labour. Standard labour with gas and air until 3:30 when it all went a bit wrong baby’s heart rate was dropping and not recovering. Baby pulled out with forceps (which thankfully I never knew about till afterwards otherwise I would have freaked out] Baby fine, me taken to theatre to be stitched, third degree tear, but all healed quickly with no issues or real pain.

But with DS, I felt everything, and my body pushed on its own. I couldn't stop it even if I tried to, it was not something I was consciously doing. So if this is how it was for me, surely this is how it is for others too? At least for a few others, if not most. In which case, that advice is pretty pointless?

Yes I had this second time - it wasn't as much stop pushing as try to slow my body's involuntary pushing down and use my hands to slow the head coming out, rather than go with it, if that makes sense, to make it as gentle as possible.

First time I pushed as hard as possible for hours - nada.

Oh one other thing - I had stitches both times (first time episiotomy, second time just one stitch for a graze) and was dreading the aftermath.

Healing was absolutely fine, minimal pain, could sit down and walk around fine, lochia was like a longish fairly light period.

In other words post birth healing can be really straightforward and fine.

I did however have HORRENDOUS constipation and impacted poo both times a few days after birth, resulting in severe piles and anal fissures, and the pain was considerably worse than giving birth and left me with long term issues. So drink loads of water and eat loads of fruit especially if you're breastfeeding!

Emergency section at 37+1. She was still 6lb3 though and is now a thriving 3 year old

First baby induced at 38 weeks. Six hours to delivery. Wasn't believed, left alone, my mum had to go and drag someone to come and look at me when I said i wanted to push. DD was distressed so had ventouse, but she was fine. Lot of people there... lots of stitches. It took bloody ages but I was off my tits on gas and air.

2nd four hour labour at home. Nice progression, had him stood up squatting and DH caught him (I think, also off tits on gas and air). Two stitches I think. Much worse than the actual labour I thought. Stabby!

3rd an uncomfortable afternoon but despite me pacing and unable to speak MW went home only for DH to call her back fifteen minutes later. So laboured without gas and air, which was disappointing. Officially a 54 minute labour I think. Was kneeling over the back of the sofa. Best bit was stroking her lovely round head sticking out in between contractions, though the MW was telling me to push but I couldn't have anyway! She plopped straight out after that brief interlude. I felt like I had been hit by a bus and technically had a PPH but was so ill with chest infection, burst eardrum, anaemia etc that it was weeks before I was even well enough to ask for help. Had a breakdown about a year later because I just forgot to look after myself.

4th was very quick again. Woke at ten past five, had a wee and felt a twinge. Went back to bed thinking if I have another three I'll wake DH. By that point they were pretty strong so started ringing round for MW etc. They didn't think they would get there in time so advised ringing an ambulance. I was quite sweary to the woman on the line. DH delivered baby at twenty past six. My mum arrived two minutes later (what a sight - me naked on all fours and DH holding baby still attached), MW a few minutes after that and paramedic half an hour later.

Tips: keep walking as much as you can. Gravity is your friend and it's very distracting. Natural third stages are really boring. The fanny ice packs are the best thing ever if you have stitches. Beware the post birth poo (especially if you've previously tried curry to bring on labour). On a similar theme, don't be proud about pissing in the shower for a few days after. Urine on a minge graze is brutal. Waters might not burst until the point of birth, which is not fun for people looking up your chuff.

Elective section at 38 weeks for a couple of medical reasons. It was calm, quick, a little scary them putting the spinal in but otherwise I couldn't have faulted it. My scar is so neat and they had me up walking 4 hours after the op

My DS was four days early. Contractions started early evening. We headed to the birthing centre at around midnight when they were every few minutes. I was very unlucky to meet a battleaxe of a midwife there who told me my birthing plan was irrelevant and that she disagreed with the additional support measures my midwife had noted down to support my (not hugely severe) anxiety issues. She also told me my baby 'felt huge' and would be a 'hard birth'. Her negativity totally destroyed the confidence that I had walking into the birthing centre... She also advised me to sleep rather than stay active and kept belittling me. Fast forward a few hours. I asked to get in the pool. She said no. I insisted. She took ages to get it ready. I went in. Felt pressure, wanted to push. She said that's ridiculous, you're nowhere near that dilated.

At that point I begged to go to the proper labour ward for an epidural. Someone picked me up and suddenly it was too late for an epidural and a new midwife, whose name I never found out, told me I had to push. I was freaked out and scared and asked for pain relief, but that midwife said gas and air would just distract me. I sobbed and begged for it for ages, I was totally overwhelmed with the pain and fear. She also refused to let me stay upright and pretty much pushed me onto my back on the bed. An hour and a half (!) of pushing later the cavalry arrived. I've never been so happy to see a bunch of doctors in my life!

I was then whisked into the OR and had an epidural. Wonderful stuff! Then tried to get baby out with episiotomy. Then ventouse, twice. Failed. Two attempts at forceps. Failed. Then they did some crazy maneuver where they lifted my legs above my head because DS was stuck. And out he came.

This this day, I'm astonished that we got through this and that he had no problems apart from a bruised head! He's a beautiful two-year old now and I'll have to sneak into his room for a kiss in a moment because writing this down has been quite upsetting.

PS: Midwife was wrong. Baby was 7lbs 9oz.

DD1 wasn't really up for being born and didn't move down. The midwife was such an idiot she had me pushing for 2 hours for no reason. Then she called the Dr who told her that she was an idiot, pretty much made my day emcs for dd1 and elcs for dd2 very happy with that outcome.

16 hour labour, bloody pressure fell to very dangerous levels crash c section ended up with me in intensive care and baby in scuba for a week.

Hypno birthing is the way to go. Had 4 children. First birth was not a very good experience, so I hypno-birthed the rest. I’m really not hippy-dippy. It’s just much easier if you go along with the contractions.. my breathing mantra was ‘this one means one less’! But you need to practice this over and over again. You have to relax everything and let your tummy (birth) muscles take over. It works. Quick and in control birth.

induced at 3am after an emergency scan showed there was no amniotic fluid left supporting DD. contractions started 30 minutes later, had pethadine injections which did absolutely nothing, and went from crowning to finished in under 10 minutes. DD was only 5.13 which made life a lot easier. a rather in-between tear where they gave me the option whether to be stitched or not, I chose the latter and healed up fine. giving birth - easiest thing in the world. contractions - absolute hell on earth and I thought I would die, but she was worth it, had her 6th birthday 8 days ago

Both of my labours were quick and not very painful. Both babies were 10 days late.

For my first child I got to the hospital they checked me and I was ready to push. I had her in the check-up room about an hour after I got to hospital.

The second time I turned down a sweep because I was so sure he'd turn up fine on his own. The doctor was very grumpy and arrogant about it, but I stuck to my guns. I'm not any kind of hippy (honestly) but I just trusted my body to do its thing in its own time!

I had a few pains then labour speeded up and he came before I expected it, so we didn't make it to hospital. My husband delivered him! It was an unplanned home birth and even though I'd expected a hospital birth it was really lovely to avoid the whole hospital thing. I got to be in my own bed watching the second half of the england game with my hubby and new little one. :)

I know it is all a bit random and I must just be lucky to have had two very positive birth experiences, but I do think women should be aware that sometimes labour can be absolutely fine and not terrifying and horrible. I saw each 'pain' as my body moving and working, and I felt quite sure that my body was perfectly designed to do this thing!

I don't know if confidence translated into two good labours or whether I was simply lucky, but I do know I felt fairly relaxed in both births. Labour certainly did hurt but it was bearable, particularly because there were waves of labour and longer times in between to rest. I had one session of hypnobirthing that stressed the naturalness of giving birth. I think that did help.

I'm writing this to try to give a bit of positivity to anyone out there who's pregnant and scared. It is bound to be a worrying time, but honestly, labour isn't bad in many cases! My labours were both mildly painful but mostly just fine and happy occassions.

DC1 - due date. Had walked the dog the night before and had a twinge at the top of a hill followed by wind-type pains that evening. Woke at 6am with a proper pain but stayed in bed for ages just chatting with my mother. Had a bath and did my make up whilst having very manageable back contractions. Lied to the maternity ward about how frequent they were because I wanted to get checked out before my stepfather did me lunch ☺️. I wasn’t in that much pain and wasn’t laughing and joking. They examined me and I was 7cm. I was so nonplussed that they got somebody else to check me out, to confirm but I was admitted. Baby was back to back but used the pool for a couple of hours, I got out at around 5.30 as the water wasn’t helping with the back pain. Started pushing at 6pm and 8lb baby born at 40 mins later with just gas and air - I lost all urge to push, so was relying on my MW to guide me. Second degree labial tear which hurt like a bitch afterwards. Labour recorded at just under 7hrs, second stage 40 mins.

DC2 was a planned HWB, had a sweep a few days before due date (long story!) on the Friday. Had a couple of niggles over the Saturday but nothing to write home about. Sunday I was having mild contractions but went to my dsis birthday party and assembled a load of toys in between them. MW came out at about 8pm and said I was 5cm so I went to bed. Woke up at 3am and when I stood up had a few vicious contractions one after the other. Called the MW our around 5am, still 5cm at 8am. Cried a lot at this point as it wasn’t replicating my previous experiences! Baby born at 9am after a 10min second stage in the pool. I knew I was close to delivering as everybody went quiet and the TV was turned off so did a couple of sneaky pushes and out he came. I forgot to catch him though so there was a mad dash for the MW’s too! Labour was recorded as 4hrs and a 10 min second stage. A couple of minor grazes.

So very straightforward births, even the b2b ones. I felt amazing after my Hb though, really well and couldn’t wait for people to come around.

At the time I thought mine was just another normal labour in that I didn't need intervention, but actually it was not without complication and I wasn't well after it due to absolute exhaustion. However, I had a really positive mindset, wasn't scared (trust in your midwives), did yoga throughout pregnancy and was so excited that all that really helped. 34 hour established labour, on drip later on and had to be given something to re-start contractions (can't for the life of me rememer what). When change of shift happened I remember head nurse being quite insistence this had been going on too long and baby needed out. Thsi was first inclining I had that the nurses felt this had been too long but as they went for the ventouse my body just sort of took over and contractions started again and managed to deliver myself. It was at this point that I really felt I had no energy to continue pushing. I did though because I had to! Half an hour after that and with episiotomy my gorgeous girl was born. An extremely long and exhausting labour, but I said immediately I would go through it all again. Yoga breathing really helped to keep me calm, but I do wish someone had prepared me for the exhaustion of labour and pain - I just about coped with contractions cause of yoga breathing, but because of long labour and ages on all fours pushing my whole upper body was aching and legs were numb. I remember feeling so guilty because I didn't have the strength to hold my baby properly - my arms and across chest were so sore. Take the midwives advice and don't feel guilty to say you are tired/sore. Congratualtions - it will be a very personal experience with an amazing outcome!!!xx