Losing weight if you dont understand why you're fat?

[Chubbrubb]

AIBU to think this is really difficult?

I know why I'm fat on a basic level. I eat too much. But WHY do I eat too much? That's a question I can't answer.

I've lost 4-5 stone twice in the last 6 years. And put it all back on. That was with slimming world. I never got to my target which was another 2-3st. I was a sz 12-14. But I couldn't lose any more, got bored and now I'm back to square one.

I almost never feel full. I think about food all the time. It's my comfort, my friend. I eat to cheer myself up when I'm sad, to celebrate when I'm happy, to reward myself when something has gone well.

I went to a Xmas party last night. I was the only woman there over a size 16. I came home and had a plate of chips and a chocolate bar

You know why you’re overweight. It’s hard changing habits to lose weight.

Brain Over Binge and Gillian Rilley are good: they argue you don’t need to focus on psychological reasons for overeating or bingeing in order to reduce this, but rather managing the desire to eat, in the moment.

My BMI is 25 but I very often don’t eat the right things and binge eat. I find the above books helpful but often “fall off the wagon”!

I feel I do need to understand it though. I can't sustain weight loss otherwise, I've proved that in recent years.

Last time I lost 4st I was adamant I was going to keep going and get to target, that I would never gain weight but here I am again with my clothes too tight and still eating.

I managed to loose weight not by stopping binging but binging on low calorie food. Canned green beans was my fav.

I don’t think it’s possible to understand why we eat more than we need, other than that it’s a biological urge stronger in some people than in others.

I also don’t think that - in most cases - understanding it would make it any easier to lose weight, unfortunately.

I'm not sure how I could manage the desire to eat. I'm hungry and thinking of food all the time. Literally from the moment I wake up.

When I'm eating one meal I'm thinking of the next.

Slimming world basically encourages you to stuff yourself with veg and pasta. But it stopped working for me after 6 months and I got bored.

Why do you eat until you are full? Where did that idea come from?

Full makes me bloat.

Because food is glorious and tastes amazing. I also know that I eat far too much but I do loads of exercise, I know I would be better to adjust my diet rather than being reliant on exercise.

This all being said, gave you thought on upping exercise rather than just cutting back?

I’m exactly the same. I tick a lot of boxes for food addiction. I need to shift about 4-5 stone and need to make adjustments but I’m emotional eater/binge eater/ food addict. I know come new year I need to make some real changes for the sake of my health and my kids. There are groups around the county for over eaters.

You can lose weight, but maybe once you're there the rewards aren't enough to sustain your motivation? Have you asked yourself why you wanted to lose weight in the first place? Was it for health? To look good in certain clothes?

I'm a healthy weight (just) and I think about food every minute of every day, practically. I'm never full either. For me it's worth it; maybe for You, it simply isn't?

I think slimming clubs tend to lead to an obsession with food and a binge/guilt/binge cycle. I lost a lot of weight on weight watchers years ago but couldn't keep it off - all I ever thought about was points and what I was going to eat next.
There's a really good book called Naturally Thin by Bethenny Frankel (from Real Housewives). It is really sensible advice and I managed to keep a steady healthy weight by taking up running and following the habits in the book. I am currently breastfeeding so carrying more weight than normal but I'm relaxed about it because I know it will come off when I wean DS off the boob.
On a side note, the philosophy of Slimming World that you can eat huge portions and still be slim/lose weight is a bit of a fatal flaw I think. It doesn't teach you portion control and I know a lot of people who have lost weight with SW, many of them several times over, but not a single one of them has lost and maintained. For that reason I think SW is a waste of time and money.

I don't feel full. I remember as a child or young adult eating my dinner and stopping, thinking I was full. I never feel that now.

When I was doing SW and plateued I started the gym, I was doing 15 miles a week up hill brisk walking on the treadmill, plus rowing and cycling, and I still couldn't lose weight. Even though i was eating less than I am now.

Is your blood sugar level more or less constant over the day, or does it show (if you were to measure it) a wild swinging pattern because of a lot of sweets and subsequent insulin response? Do you eat mostly carbo hydrates (bread, pasta, sugar, sweets) or mostly proteins and vegetables? Do you pick "light products" in the shops, or do you go for something more fatty (skimmed milk vs. whole milk)? Do you rather eat a fruit than a sweet?

I could have written this post at the start of the year, since March have lost almost 4 stone on a low carb high fat diet and it has been a revelation for me as I am no longer hungry. Currently eating carbs as visiting family for christmas and I can believe how hungry I have been and more to the point that I used to feel like this all the time. This is the only diet I have ever done where I haven't felt totally deprived.

I eat protein and veg every day but carbs too. If I don't eat bread/ potatoes/ rice/ pasta I would be ravenous. I have to eat low fat because I have gallstones. I can't eat butter or oil, or anything full fat as it sets off an attack.

I don't really like fruit or yoghurt. I eat bananas and grapes, and certain apples but no other fruit.

One of the great things about the low carb way of eating is it stops the constant hunger and cravings. Have a look at the low carb threads on here. It works.

The books I mentioned might help, managing the “addictive desire” and accepting that often feeling (somewhat) hungry can be normal and healthy.

If you were a size 12/14, how far away from your target weight were you? It seems to get waaay away more difficult the slimmer you get; I think the science says that the slimmer you Are, the lower your metabolism gets, hence the fewer the calories required. It's a pita.

Have you worked out your calorie requirements?

x post - sounds like it's the lack of fat that is making you constantly hungry then

I cant do a high fat diet unfortunately.

Possibly I could when I've had my gallbladder out. But they won't take it out til I'm thinner as I'm fat and not in constant pain if I eat carefully.

I agree with dozer that feeling hungry is actually quite normal.

Lack of fat will make you really hungry.

At a 12/14 I was about 13.5 stone.

My target was 11 stone.

I never got anywhere near it.