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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Christmas visitors and bugs

112 replies

Pinkpeanut27 · 21/12/2017 18:10

Ok I'm freaking out just had a call to say one of my Xmas guests who is currently on holiday has gone down with terrible d and v which they are putting down to some vegetable soup . They come Xmas eve .
AIBU to say they need to be 48 hours clear before they come ?
We are going away on 27 th so getting sick would spoil it . I have 3 kids and we are all going to be bunched up sharing rooms and the bathroom .

OP posts:
Original poster
Pinkpeanut27 · 21/12/2017 19:57

So even if she is ok tomorrow and theoretically gets the 48 hours clear in would you still say no .
I would personally as it's upsetting me now but it could cause a major family row as it's DH side and he can't see tne problem even if she isn't well .

If it was my family I would just say you can't come you know what I'm like so sorry .

OP posts:
Supermagicsmile · 21/12/2017 20:01

Text her Saturday night and say you've all come down with it and she can't come!

Original poster
Pinkpeanut27 · 21/12/2017 20:02

She'd still come

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 21/12/2017 20:03

'but it could cause a major family row as it's DH side and he can't see tne problem even if she isn't well .'

And yet he'd take himself off to bed and not do a thing to assist his kids if they get sick. Then tough tatties for him. Tell them they can't come.

Rossigigi · 21/12/2017 20:05

Yes I'd still say no. I can guarantee she won't be clear by tomorrow..

HermionesRightHook · 21/12/2017 20:05

I think you need to cancel them coming. Really apologetic message, so so sorry, but you absolutely cannot risk norovirus before your holiday, and please come round on x x date. If you do it now they have time to get themselves a meal know for Christmas day.

expatinscotland · 21/12/2017 20:05

'She'd still come'

And expect someone who's ill and vomiting the prepare a meal for her? She's got a cheek! 'Look, I'm really sorry, but you're ill. I'm an emetophobe and can't handle being sick. So Christmas has to be cancelled and we can't host anymore.'

Cherrycokewinning · 21/12/2017 20:06

I would be properly offended if you cancelled my invite, yes.

Am I reading your post right that sil and niece are travelling a long way to see you and if they don’t niece would be spending Xmas alone??!

TheFairyCaravan · 21/12/2017 20:06

I wouldn’t have them and if my DH insisted I would up and go to a Travel Lodge or something until they had gone.

I’m mid panic here. DS2 is a student nurse and got home from uni on Sunday, he’s got some sort of flu bug that had him puking yesterday. I’m an emetophobe and have been snappy all day.

expatinscotland · 21/12/2017 20:07

'This guest is always ill when she visits and we always end up getting it . Colds etc I can manage but this not .'

Stop inviting her over.

Rossigigi · 21/12/2017 20:07

And you need to say to your Dh- are really prepared for her to come, pass it on to all of us, or one of us who then passes to another and so on. Then we will be unable to go away, because we will then have vomiting family members for the next 2 weeks!!

expatinscotland · 21/12/2017 20:11

'I would be properly offended if you cancelled my invite, yes.'

I'd be offended that any relative would willingly expose my family to a virus.

ZoopDragon · 21/12/2017 20:14

Not unreasonable at all. I would ask them not to come, a text such as

'We hope you feel better soon. There is a particularly virulent strain of norovirus this year, very similar to food poisoning. Because we are going away on the 27th, I must ask you not to come to ours for Christmas this year, even if you are feeling better by then, as these bugs are so contagious. I'm sure you'll understand. We look forward to catching up with you in the new year'

Stand your ground. A tummy bug will ruin your holiday as well as causing much suffering. They would be foolish/ irresponsible to risk infecting you all!

QueenArseClangers · 21/12/2017 20:14

Why the fuck would you be offended Cherry?

You’d take offence at family members not wanting to be made ill by your germs and potentially fucking up xmas AND a holiday? Hmm

QueenArseClangers · 21/12/2017 20:15

ZoopDragon’s text is perfect. Send that.

Cherrycokewinning · 21/12/2017 20:15

Of course I would, and so would many people. It’s christmas, you’ve made your plans. You tell the host 4 days beforehand you’ve been sick from a meal and they tell you you can’t come? In what world isn’t that rude?!

TheFairyCaravan · 21/12/2017 20:19

You tell the host 4 days beforehand you’ve been sick from a meal and they tell you you can’t come? In what world isn’t that rude?!

We’ll unless you’ve sent samples in and had it confirmed by Environmental Health you’ve got no way of knowing if you’ve got food poisoning or Noro. I would err on the side of caution, think it was Noro and stay the fuck away because I’m not selfish, entitled or rude.

Cherrycokewinning · 21/12/2017 20:19

Or normal

genever · 21/12/2017 20:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OMGtwins · 21/12/2017 20:22

We caught d and v from a toddler DS of one of our friends, because we visited them 2 days before we travelled to my ILs house. first night our son puked, 2nd night son and daughter puked, 3rd night son, daughter and wife puked. I drove us all home on the 4th day after the kids had stopped puking and we had to cancel going to my parents... I did not like, I had the other end...

That was totally accidental and ruined our Christmas, I wouldn't have people who are not 48 hours clear of any puking anywhere near my house.

Yanbu.

OhHolyJesus · 21/12/2017 20:22

I wouldn't be offended, it's understandable.
My BIL brought norovirus with him to my MIL's 70th and every single person attending, apart from the kids (!) got ill.

FrancisCrawford · 21/12/2017 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cherrycokewinning · 21/12/2017 20:27

I’ve explained why I’d be offended.

GingerIvy · 21/12/2017 20:28

Why would anyone risk passing their illness to others?!

My ds is sitting here right now, headache and nauseated. We've already discussed that we're going nowhere now that he's vomited. We'll be home now until after Boxing Day. Not risking anyone else getting it.

ItsBeginingToLookAlotLikeChris · 21/12/2017 20:31

Always a certificate kind of person who doesn't care for about this sort of thing. I had dd in winter and as led df to wash his hands loads, which he duly did without a murmur. My db my god took it as personal insult lots of protestations that I couldn't keep it up, I didn't really bother now, just new born, winter etc wash hands.
Do what you feel comfortable with.