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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is BU?

118 replies

Masonmumny12 · 21/12/2017 08:53

I won't tell you which person I am as I honestly want to know if IBU...
Person A has a car she has a disabled husband (he is mobile and does not need to be driven around 24/7) a 1yr old child and is 6 months pregnant.
Person B is a shift worker (mostly nights) her and her husband has had a tough time lately due to financial problems, and really needs the car for work.

Person A lends person B her car I October. Person B promises to return the car in December (no date specified, but before Christmas) all is fine.

December comes around and Person A asks for the car to be returned within 2 weeks, give or take a few days.
Person B said that she would like the car until January, but this is not a possibility for Person A.
A day before Person B is to return the car, she gets into an accident. Thankfully she is not hurt, however the car is damaged. Her insurers give her a courtesy car. All great.
Person A is angry because she now has no car for Christmas. She said to Person B that she expected a car on day 'X' and regardless she should have one (meaning she should be entitled to the courtesy car)
Person B believes that this accident was no one's fault and all has been put out.

Who is BU??
Tried to keep objective x

OP posts:
Original poster
Masonmumny12 · 21/12/2017 18:32

@gamerchick nope... Still waiting on the call... I feel like I've hit a brick wall for now.

OP posts:
Cherrycokewinning · 21/12/2017 18:36

Thing is OP she originally did you a favour - as I read it you couldn’t afford to insure or SORN it (which needs insurance) from October- December. So what else could you do, you would’ve had to sell it.

I don’t think you can or should get the courtesy car. And how can you call the police?

You need to focus your energy on getting your car fixed and on the road

SandyDenny · 21/12/2017 19:17

Please be careful with the details OP, this could be the sort of thread that the DM would pick up, family dilemma at Christmas and all

Situp · 21/12/2017 19:22

I would be more concerned at this stage that if the car is written off, the money will be paid to her.
Based on your experience so far, do you think she would pass all or any of the money onto you?

SandyDenny · 21/12/2017 19:22

SORN doesn't need insurance, you keep your car off the public road. You can insure for theft but you don't have to AFAIK. OP wouldn't have had any costs for that

AdalindSchade · 21/12/2017 19:23

You just have to wait for her insurance to pay for your car to be fixed. Nothing else to do. I doubt she has the money to hire you a car over Christmas. You will have to chalk it up to experience.

Indie139 · 21/12/2017 19:32

person b

Slightlygiganticpants · 21/12/2017 20:45

Person b

HeebieJeebies456 · 21/12/2017 23:10

Hmmm.....i smell something very 'off' about this.

What if the accident happened a lot earlier than the date she told you - hence her 'refusal' to return it on the agreed date?
Or it's been stolen/wrecked?

There's absolutely no excuse for her not giving you the details of the accident, damage. cost to fix or location of the vehicle.
I wonder how many miles she's clocked up on it?

She's totally walking all over you and you're too nice a mug for letting her.
I'd do what a pp suggested - threaten to call the police on her unless she gives you the details asap.
You have to go see the car for yourself and make sure everything is above board and legit.

I'd also ring her husband again and ask him outright for the full details of what's been going on - i don't believe he doesn't know any pertinent details either Hmm ....and you don't just 'walk out' over something like this Hmm

ItsYuleyme · 22/12/2017 10:35

You said that you were cousins, can your Auntie (her Mother) help with this?
Or your Mother as her Aunt?
I'd be round to her house in a taxi to confront her, if I was you!

Redsippycup · 22/12/2017 10:45

Can she insure you as a named driver on the courtesy car? (I've never had one so don't know if this is possible)

Original poster
Masonmumny12 · 22/12/2017 11:20

Surprise surprise! I never did get that phone call @redsippycup yes she can but clearly won't x

OP posts:
YogaDrone · 22/12/2017 11:32

I would tell her that she needs to hire you an equivalent car for the duration until your car is repaired and returned, otherwise you will take her to the small claims court to recoup the value of the car so that you can replace it yourself.

Although any half way reasonable person would have offered to hire you a replacement car in the first place.

Not sure what the police could do in this situation - surely it's a civil matter?

Cambionome · 22/12/2017 11:32

What are you going to do, op?

Indigo911 · 22/12/2017 11:34

Person B is BU and i’d be livid if I were person A

Original poster
Masonmumny12 · 22/12/2017 12:10

@cambionome I have a plan in but It does require me to sit tight and wait.... I am a little reluctant to share as I have mentioned a lot of info so I could be identified.

OP posts:
Cambionome · 22/12/2017 13:36
Smile
PoppyandPersil · 22/12/2017 13:42

Right now I would be more concerned with whether the damage to the car is significant enough to write it off. If so the payment will be winging it’s way to your cousin and up to now the family goodwill has been more than a little one sided.

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