Who's name is it

[weekfour]

DD is 6. The name on her birth certificate is the full version of a name but since birth she has been called a shortened version. It’s not this name but think along the lines of Margaret and Maggy.

We managed to navigate reception fine. There are two ‘Maggy’s’ in the class but the teacher would use Maggy A and Maggy B. All paperwork at school says Margaret known as Maggy.

For some reason, the Year 1 teacher has decided she wants one Maggy and one Margaret and my DD has been selected to be Margaret. It’s not what we wanted her to be called! It’s seeped in to wider society now and we can’t walk through the village with out someone shouting ‘Hi Margaret’.

Should also add it’s not the only name that’s doubled up in the class but only my DD has been renamed by the teacher.

So AIBU to speak to the teacher? My DD is confused and doesn’t understand why I won’t call her Margaret. Or am I being precious? Should add that teacher managed to use Maggy all through parents evening which leads me to believe she understands it’s not really on.

Teacher sounds a bit nutty but I would just let it go. It's just a name. Nice name by the way.

I think it’s a little odd, I’m sure a quiet word with the teacher will resolve it.

I’m sure the teacher was just trying to make things easier, but I would be a little cross about this too. I would talk to the teacher about it.

I dont think teacher should decide what she calls a child at all. YANBU

I would be annoyed, I have an Alexander known as Alex hes been Alex all the way through school the teach should use the known as name imo .

This happened to me at primary school and I hated it. I think I'd have to say something just because of that.

Why did you give your daughter a name that you don’t want to actually use?

What does your daughter want to be called?

So you named your kid Margaret and now your DD wants to be called her full name but you prefer the cutesy twee shortened version?

YABU!

I think this is always going to be a problem when you put a long name on a birth certificate but call the child a shortened version or nickname. There will always be people who insist on using the full version. If you want her to stop it then just ask her. Which name does your daughter prefer?

Speak to the teacher. I'd be very unhappy about that.

I vote the DD is actually either a Jessica or an Annabel!

I’m glad I wasn’t losing the plot. I suggested that she mention it first, she looked a bit worried (total teacher pleaser which isn’t a bad thing) but got very upset when I suggested I should talk to the teacher. She said she didn’t want the teacher to get into trouble.

I would be annoyed that the issue has been forced by the teacher, but if your DD has decided she'd rather go by her formal name now then you should respect her wishes.

What does your daughter want?

Or am I being precious?
No, I dont think you are. She is your DD and the teacher should address by the name she is known as. Its as simple as that. So, Say something now.

Dont understand - you give her one name on birth ceetificate but call her something else instead - why not put that name on birth certificate to avoid any confusion. Teacher is calling her by birth certificate name so dont see problem here

The teacher has no right whatsoever to do this. Everyone is entitled to a name or a prefered name. Thats why there's a known as box on school app forms.
My nephew is a Richie but on dad's request he's Richard on his bc. However my sister is adamant that he's Richie. It's never been a problem. Also a little girl in dds class was called Sophie (not actual name) and was known as Poppy (again not actual name).
It was just what she calls herself.

You're asking whose name it is - your DD's. What does she want to be called?

Is the short name a totally deferent name like your example of Margaret/Maggie or Libby for Elizabeth, or is it just the first syllable of the name like Jess/Jessica?

I'd be less cross about the first syllable thing.

If your dd wants to be called Maggy then just send a quick email to the teacher explaining that.

But it is very common Seniorcitizen1 to put one name on the certificate but use a shortened or familiarised name. Its not unreasonable. Many people chose a parents/grandparents name out of respect but prefer a modernised version for day to day use, such as Kate from Katherine or Lizie from Elizabeth. The teacher should be guided by the child and the parents.

This happened to my ds last year - I just spoke to the teacher and told her that we call him by the shortened version all the time ds wanted to be called this at school too. She agreed and all was fine, but I would have pursued it more strongly if she had continued.

Poor teacher. I don't know how they put up with this. As if it wasn't a bloody momentous task to teach children and keep on top of it all they're now being tasked with negotiating nicknames and the like. Who'd be a teacher!