Posted Christmas cards addressed to first names

[cjt110]

We've had 2 Christmas cards through the post so far.

At least one of them were addressed to CJT and CJT as opposed to Mr and Mrs CJT or anything else formal.

It reall gets on my nerves. You know my last name. You've known it for fucking years!

AIBU to think its shoddy, and weird, not to address a card properly?

Oh for the love of fuck. Your lovely friends, presumably with whom you are on a first name basis, sent you a card. And you're pissed off because it wasn't formally addressed?

I do this, particularly to friends who are married or living together but have different surnames. If they all have the same name I might address it to "The Smiths". The only people I would address a card to Mr and Mrs whatever are my parents' generation.

miniloco Not pissed off. I didn't say that anywhere. I said I find it weird and shoddy. Both parties know we are married and that I use my married name and am a Mrs. So there's no minefield there at all.

Just seems very odd to receive a card through the post using just first names.

In fact I would go so far as to say I find my friends sending me a card to Mrs Pencil to be weird. You know my first name. You've known it for fucking years.

MaroonPencil Perhaps it's my opinion that's weird and old fashioned then?

Interesting to see most would address with first names only

But Christmas cards are not formal writing

I’m with you op, although I am guilty of doing this when couples aren’t married as writing both names in full can end up taking two lines

Get a serious grip. This has to be the pettiest post I've read. Are you royalty?
How about being grateful that someone took the time to send you a card!!

You are BU.

"Weird and shoddy"? Are you for real? Your good friends cared enough about you to send you a card and you're judging their letter addressing skills?

Perhaps go back to bed and try again.

People send us cards like this! Presumably because I didn't change my name and was very vocal about it it's much easier than addressing a card to Contessa Di Plump and DH, IMO.

It's got to the point where if we get a card addressed to Contessa DHsurname then we know it's from someone who is either old or doesn't know me at all BIL/SIL/StepMIL's parents

It's not formal writing though! They are your friends sending you a Christmas card. I would never dream of sending my married friends a card and putting to Mrs and mr blah blah. I'd use their first names.

Usually people complain in here about cards being addressed to Mr and Mrs husband name surname. I can't see the issue with either.

As part of my post grad education we did writing so even emails, if say for work, are relatively formal.

So like when we were taught to sign off yours faithfully or sincerely, depending on whether a letter was addressed "Dear Sir" or "Dear Mr Jones"?

Your cards are from your best friends, not your bank!

I don't think Christmas cards are classed as formal letters.

I think I've done the same on a few Christmas cards. It took me ages to write them all and I wouldn't be surprised if I wrote a few with the wrong names by the end of it! At least they got your names right.

I think you need to lie down in a dark room cjt and breathe. Christmas stress must be getting to you.

I like first names and find it really odd when DM posts my birthday card and she addresses it to Miss B Seville when she knows and uses my first name and it's about 30 years since I've used Miss as a title.

Or our old neighbours who always address our card to Mr & Mrs Seville even though DP and I aren't married, so neither Mr or Mrs Seville exist (well Mrs Seville is my DM, who has never even met my old neighbour) and we're both facebook friends with our old neighbours so they know what our actual names are.

I prefer it. I don't like titles and whilst obviously I'm able to write a formal letter when I need to, I can't get my knickers in a twist about rules and etiquette when it comes to friends. Informal is better there, imo. Formal etiquette seems a bit outdated and a way of looking down on those who aren't in the know, or who had a less formal education.

I think you are probably 'right' but, dear me, is it even worth a moments thought. I know you aren't claiming to be anything more than a little disapproving but even so you sound a bit overly critical. I get that we all have things that we are a bit fussy about. I admit I do too 😊 but sometimes you have to remember that some things don't really matter.

. They've presumably sent the cards with good intentions and that's what actually matters,

You'd hate me then.

I addressed one to noggin-bosher (tall friend constantly hitting her head, it's a joke between us), another to nana and granddad, mum and dad, the bond-riley family and John and Mary. Only one or two got addressed two got addressed to Mr and Mrs such and such.

''shoddy''?

It would be ''shoddy'' if it was a firm sending you conformation of an interview or a letter from your doctors surgery but an Xmas card from your mate? Not so much.

I wrote silly names on the Xmas cards I sent . Things like 'Team Surname' and 'The Surname Crew' or plays on their names. Thought I was being funny 🤣

How about on a gift tag? Or inside the card.....?

Do you expect that to say "to mrs cjt"

Why is that so different?

I use first names quite a lot, I think it's friendly :)

Snap @DailyMaileatmyshit 🤣

I was brought up to address cards as Mr and Mrs J Jones. And when John dies, Mrs J Jones, because Mrs M Jones implied she was divorced, which was shameful in those days, and would offend her. Nowadays both of these alternatives will offend. So - Mary and John Jones. But actually, now I come to think of it, although Mary and John are friends, I'm not sure whether Mary uses her own surname so should it be Mary Smith and John Jones? So it's easier to stick with what I'm sure about - Mary and John.

Well apart from a quick glance to check the card is really for me, I then throw the envelope in the recycling....