My DH does not want me on the iPad while tv is on

[Cab65]

When we are watching tv in the evenings my DH does not like me being on my iPad even though it is on mute. He says we should be watching tv together. He does however look at his iPad various times during the evening. I can’t see what the problem with me doing the same is.

Not pay attention to the film and then annoy the other person by asking what's going on? Ha! I used to read, study, knit, do puzzles or whatever, sometimes even in another room, whilst XH watched some macho violent film that I wasn't interested in, and I could still tell him what was going on a damn' sight more accurately than he could tell me. I startled him by commenting one time "so they're having sex now, eh" - how did I know? Because of the obligatory saxophone wail, of course!

On the other hand, on the rare occasions I wanted to watch something, he'd have to either sit there with a face on or come in every now and then for the express purpose of telling me it was shit. Or the passive-aggressive falling asleep and snoring unnaturally loudly, that was a favourite

Are people being deliberately obtuse or did they not read the bit where HE allows himself to be on the iPad whilst watching tv together but he doesn’t want the OP to? The iPad/playing footy lovingly while watching tv is a red herring it’s the fact that he’s a hypocrite and probably controlling.

I’m assuming the OP isn’t back because the Lord and Master demands she sits next to him like a loyal pet.

*Footsy

Each to their own but I would find this waaay too much. You can do more than one thing at a time including giving him your attention!

I hate it if DH uses his phone or tablet when I'm trying to watch tv. I find the tablet screen and movement of his hand distracting. If we're watching something together we don't use other screens. If one of us wants to use another screen we take it into a different room or pause the TV.

Many years ago this was one of my ExH ‘rules’.
Along with no reading or answering the telephone after 8pm.
I was required to watch television and comment, anything else was deemed antisocial.

It got worse.

I can see both sides. It depends how he's saying it though. If he's saying "it would be nice if..." then fair enough. If he's being bossy and controlling then not ok.