Did I get this wrong?

[goldengimbas]

Name changes as very outing
I have organised the Secret Santa this year, we have 32 staff and the limit was £3
I draw out the names three weeks ago and gave them out so everyone happy
We have two members of staff who have just had babies so I'd decided rather then giving them someone to buy for I would just get them something and put them in the pile, then they are not having to worry about choosing and buying something for a member of staff but they would still l have a present themselves.
This morning my manager aged asked me to explain why I had done it and when I explained that I thought they might be a bit busy so I was quite happy to do a present for them both. I got told it was not fair and they should have been given a name and I have made them both feel awful (actually spoke to one of the staff in question when they bobbed in last week end explained what I had done and they thanked me for doing it as they are so busy and overwhelmed right now).
I was told to take out the two presents for them as other staff would not think it was fair, I thought who else on the staff would know anyway.
I can't do right for doing wrong

[juneybean]

What's it got to do with the manager anyways?!

[CherryChasingDotMuncher]

I can see that your intentions were good but having a baby makes you feel massively excluded from the real world anyway, especially the workplace, and this would have upset me had it been me

[Babyroobs]

I don't think I'd really be bothered about a £3 secret santa gift a week after giving birth, I'm surprised they were included if on mat leave ! Where I work we certainly wouldn't think to include anyone on mat leave.

[goldengimbas]

Yep I did it so everyone would would get a present and no one on Maternity leave is stressed out basicly
Anyone over the someone else next year

[Bizzysocks]

You did nothing wrong. People wine about the silliest things.

If you had contacted the while they where in hospital with their baby you would have got a telling off for that too.

Your manager is a duck asking you to remove their presents as it wouldn't be fair on the others, how bloody tight are they not wanting someone to receive a £3 gift they didn't even contribute to.

[LastOneDancing]

I don't think you did anything wrong golden, in fact you were very thoughtful for not letting them be left out and not hassling them with trivia.
But the lesson here is never to organise anything, or put yourself out in any way for colleagues. It bites you on the arse every time and nobody ever thanks you.

[Crunchymum]

I think you must work is in the most boundary-less place on Earth?

What makes you think that someone gives a shit about secret Santa 3/4 weeks post partum? They are on ML, leave them alone.

[otherdoor]

I read your first post as they'd just got back from mat leave, but reading your clarification that they had literally just had babies I think you did a nice thing.

[Pennywhistle]

It’s £3 budget!

I would absolutely not feel uncomfortable receiving a £3 gift even if I hadn’t put one in myself, I’d just think it was terribly kind someone had thought of me.

I really cannot understand why anyone would be in the least bit upset about this.

[goldengimbas]

Yep in future I will not be putting myself forward for anything.
As I said one of the mums (then one with the prem baby) quickly bobbed in last week and I explained to her and see seemed and told me she was graceful as she had not had time to turn round and then I get my boss saying she is really upset.
My boss does have a tendency to play staff off against each other so I would not be surprised if she is doing this

[goldengimbas]

Not graceful- I mean grateful

[BackforGood]

No, Yweren'tBU, you were being really thoughtful and kind.
Your Manager is behaving ridiculously.
Even if any other colleagues found out I can't imagine anyone having a different reaction form "oh, isn't goldengimbas thoughtful". IT's a fun gift for £3, not a £2000 bonus

[Nyx1]

If they are on leave then what's it got to do with them?

Are they getting their gifts in june?

[Glumglowworm]

Tbh I wouldn’t expect someone on Mat leave to be involved in secret Santa anyway, especially not with a sick newborn.

You had good intentions but I think it was misplaced

[Bizzysocks]

cherry you would have been upset that someone bought you a gift!! Instead of the other options a)leaving you out completely or b) contacting you while in hospital about contributing .
The op made the nicest choice yet you would have been upset with her.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

I'm on your side golden. Had I just had an infant, especially one that needed extra care, I would have really appreciated it.

But you know what they say "No good deed goes unpunished."

[SammySays]

You sound lovely to me I don’t know why anyone would have taken offence!

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

If anyone would like to send me a £3.00 gift, a box of maltase's would be joy and a delight.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

malteasers - sorry folks

[goldengimbas]

No not june the lady who came in last week took hers (so I can't take that out anyway)
And the other ladies mum works just down the road so I was going to bob it in and ask her to tell her we are all thinking of her

[spiderlight]

I think it was very thoughtful of you, OP.

[WonderTweek]

After reading your first post I also thought you were in the wrong, but after the second one I feel that you were being really kind and considerate. I'm fairly sure the mums aren't going to be interested in an office secret santa (no matter how lovely the office is ) with premature/ill newborns. It's a bit weird that the management got involved though - do they know what happened with the babies?

Anyways, I think you were just being nice so I wouldn't worry.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

I think we all need to boycott Secret Santa going forwards. It's just not that fun.

Someone is always disappointed/left out/complaining it's not fair/stressed about what to buy/insulted by their present/ or having a meltdown (delete as appropriate).

[VladmirsPoutine]

True; no good deed goes unpunished. Your boss sounds like a real joy-kill and a liar if she wrongly told you that colleague was upset when she wasn't. I'd be weary of her tbh.

[Gemini69]

Okay... so you told One new Mother... this was what you were doing.. yes ... and now all of a sudden the Boss knows

I think you have a SNITCH in your camp Lady