Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was IU to be feeling this way or her

62 replies

Mmmmmmmchips · 18/12/2017 16:40

Went for school pickup
A mum whose DC my DC plays with cane to talk to me.
Amongst the general chit chat I asked her how her Xmas planning was going.
I then told her I’ve done most if not all my shopping.
She then asked why do I buy presents and celebrate Xmas if I’m not Christian.
I am in fact Indian but not any religion.
She asked me again do I celebrate it and what’s the point.
It made me feel awkward but mumbled something.
So was she thinking what someone else would be thinking and just said it out aloud or did she have a point.
For the record I don’t think they are regular churchgoers if at allConfused

OP posts:
RestingGrinchFace · 18/12/2017 16:43

'Because it's a secular holiday these days' or 'I still think Jesus is pretty great' would both have been appropriate responses. She was just being a bit of a twat and trying to make you uncomfortable on purpose.

Notevilstepmother · 18/12/2017 16:44

Some people just say what flits through their mind without engaging their brain.

I guess a lot of people would see someone Indian and assume that they are Hindu for example.

I think it wasn’t very polite of her, but she probably was ignorant rather than nasty, and maybe she was just curious.

Sorry it made you feel uncomfortable Flowers.

Notevilstepmother · 18/12/2017 16:46

Maybe I’m being too kind.

Anyway, she was ignorant, please ignore her.

Ansumpasty · 18/12/2017 16:47

It was a pretty ignorant thing for her to say.

Notevilstepmother · 18/12/2017 16:48

I don’t think she has a point or that she’s thinking what other people are thinking. I’d be thinking that it’s probably time I got more organised, I’m nowhere near ready.

TrojansAreSmegheads · 18/12/2017 16:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bizzysocks · 18/12/2017 16:52

She was rude.

''I believe in father Christmas ' would have shut her up

Trills · 18/12/2017 16:53

She was being an idiot.

It's highly likely that more people who celebrate Christmas in the UK are not-Christian than are Christian.

[https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/sep/04/half-uk-population-has-no-religion-british-social-attitudes-survey Half of the UK have no religion]]

Trills · 18/12/2017 16:53

Fixed link hopefully

ZigZagIntoTheBlue · 18/12/2017 16:53

It's not reserved for religious folk? I'm not any religion and I celebrate Christmas as a time to get together with family. In my mind it's nothing to do with a made up birthday!

Allthewaves · 18/12/2017 16:55

Ok to ask if u celebrate but rude to ask why.

gamerwidow · 18/12/2017 17:01

Petty and ignorant what’s it got to do with her if you choose to celebrate Christmas or not. It’s as much a cultural celebration as a religious one in this country. I’m an atheist but I still do Christmas because it’s part of the traditions I grew up with.

MadMags · 18/12/2017 17:03

Wow, I would have just assumed she was curious! Do you have any reason to suspect she was being prejudiced?

Ceto · 18/12/2017 17:06

Silly woman. You could reasonably point out that the origin of Christmas is pagan and predates Christ.

Trills · 18/12/2017 17:06

Do you have any reason to suspect she was being prejudiced?

Yes, the words she spoke as reported in the OP.

MadMags · 18/12/2017 17:08

Trills are you OP?

Notreallyarsed · 18/12/2017 17:10

It is pretty ignorant, unless she regularly asks her white non-Christian friends why they bother with Christmas!

Trills · 18/12/2017 17:11

No.

But I can read the OP and I don't think we need anything more than that to suspect that this woman was being prejudiced.

Knittedfairies · 18/12/2017 17:12

There are Indians who are Christians/Christians who are Indian.. Ignorant woman

MadMags · 18/12/2017 17:13

Oh, well done. You can read.

You don’t know this woman. OP does. It’s possible that she’s ignorant and clumsy, but not maliciously so. Which is why I asked OP the question. Since she’s actually met and spoken to this woman. Hmm

KimmySchmidt1 · 18/12/2017 17:14

she was being unimaginative at best, argumentative at worst.

Was she saying it because she hates Christmas and thinks its a pain in the arse, or in a way that suggested she thought she owned the holiday because she was white?

Honestly you can't please some people!

WhoWants2Know · 18/12/2017 17:16

Did she know for a fact that you aren’t Christian, or did she assume that because of the way you look?

I’d possibly told her that I celebrate Santa Claus and worship the Coca Cola company.

Trills · 18/12/2017 17:17

Asking "do you have reason to suspect?" is suggesting that what was said is not enough in itself to suspect prejudice. Suggesting that the OP is jumping to conclusions or being overly sensitive. She is not.

Situp · 18/12/2017 17:18

She shouldnt have assumed OP wasn't Christian because she is Indian. There are 27 million christians in India.

Would she have asked a white British person the same question, which is just as valid when over 50% of the population now claim to have no religion? I doubt it.

Half the people she knows will be celebrating Christmas when they 're not religious. Making assumptions and comments which seem to be based on OP's ethnicity is out of order.

YANBU

MadMags · 18/12/2017 17:19

That’s quite a leap. Well done. Unfortunately, your projections don’t actually apply to my fairly innocuous question.

But you can keep trying, if it suits you.