To be absolutely seething and to go against DSDs wishes?

[K1092902]

DSD is 25.

Last night was her friends birthday. She had a few drinks and then rung me and her dad this morning at 8am to ask for a lift home as she was leaving here car there.

Anyway she wakes up this morning to find her friend (who has no driving licence) had driven her car back to her house.

She went and knocked on her door and spoke to her mum as we wanted the car back.

I want to call the police, but DSD has begged me not to as she doesnt want her friend to get into trouble.

Lots of upset here as said friend has now told DSD to fuck off basically because her mum found out and has kicked her out

Im fuming and want to call the police. AIBU?

ringing Dear Daddy and Step Mum at 8am on a Sunday morning to ask for a lift home.

pete In the normal functional world it is perfectly acceptable to ask a parent, relative, sibling, partner for a lift. It is only in MN world where many posters are so utterly dysfunctional that they don't manage to have any form of interpersonal relationships that asking someone for a lift is apparently derisory. I realise petenormal functioning relationships may not be your experience.

This happened to my friend's son. The friend who had taken his car told the police he had given him permission (which maybe he had - friend's son was very drunk and also in a bad place) and my friend ended up losing his license and being banned from driving for a year. He later wanted to join the police force but wasn't allowed to because of the driving conviction.

I'd say stay out of it, not least because your DSD is an adult!

Stay out of it, your DSD is an adult who can make her own decisions.

She already has a controlling dad who wants to micro manage her life and doesn't need you to do the same.

In the normal functional world it is perfectly acceptable to ask a parent, relative, sibling, partner for a lift.

THIS ^

And once to twice Mam and Dad have rung DS to ask for a lift for whatever reason. And we've been given one.

The post makes almost perfect sense to me. The only bit I’m not clear on is what exactly happened at 8am but I think the jist is this...

Stepdaughter was staying at a friend’s house after a few drinks, along with some other friends. At 8am she wakes up and decides she doesn’t want to drive home (too hungover?) so asks if her parents can come get her so that she can leave her car at the friend’s house and collect another time.

However, when she actually gets up she discovers that one of her other friends, who was presumably also sleeping over, has taken stepdaughter’s keys and driven the car to her own home.

Stepdaughter therefore goes to this other friend’s house to get the car back. She ends up talking to this friend’s mum, who is furious that her daughter has taken a car and driven it home without a licence (possibly while drunk too?) Presumably stepdaughter gets the car back at this point.

Friend’s mum therefore kicks her out, and friend contacts stepdaughter to tell her to fuck off for grassing her up to her mum.

Stepdaughter doesn’t want to take it any further but OP is considering calling the police to report the friend for taking the car and driving without a licence.

Is that about right, OP?

In the normal functional world it is perfectly acceptable to ask a parent, relative, sibling, partner for a lift.

Agreed.
I'm 25 and whilst I wouldn't need a lift as I don't drink there has been times when my 45 year old mother has called me asking for a lift. Not that crazy.

The rest of it though is ridiculous, she can sort her own issues. I would only get involved if she asked for help.

Ah, 2 different friends. These threads are like some mental agility test.

No idea what you're talking about.

I read this last night and made no sense of it whatsoever.

Who’s car did the friend drive?
Why did dsd ask for a lift at 8am and from where?
Where is the car now?
Why did dsd NOT have her car keys with her?

Absolutely no replies from op makes me think this a a bit bullshit anyway.

If the car is not where it was left, ring the police and report it stolen.

All that seething and fuming and yet she never came back to the thread

I'm fumming.

"Why did dsd NOT have her car keys with her?"

That's why it might be an idea not to involve the police.

It could perhaps be construed as permission having been given.

I think Frieda has it bang on as to what has happened.

Stay out of it now OP.