How would you expect a school to respond?

[Methenyouplus4]

DC is 13. At lunch time at school, they were with friends getting lunch (with tray in hands). Another student (the same age) came and pulled the bottom half of their uniform down, leaving DC stood in their underwear in front of the vast majority of the school.

The other student had brought over about 7 other students specifically to watch them do this.

Would like to know how you would expect the school to respond to this?

DC said they don't really know other student (other than knowing their name and it being another student in year group). Thank you.

I didn't think OFSTED could issue a sanction as such (to the child), but more that they would investigate behaviour policy/ safe guarding at the school?

DC is leaving school in July as it's a middle. It has an affluent catchment and, from what I can gather from my own experience / that of other parents, they seem to have a 'that doesn't happen at our school' attitude to bullying/assault etc.

As much as the thought of an assembly is scary, it has to happen. Your dc wouldn't be named - infect, I doubt they are the only victim. There will be pupils who have no idea of the humilation caused and will think it is a joke - they need to be educated. You have to reach every pupil - make them realise the severity of the behaviour and define the consequences if they choose to participate. You have to make it implicit that it is wrong and not a joke. For every child who is publically humiliated, there will be another who is humiliated like this in a PE changing room where there is no direct supervision. They might not tell a teacher, so it could happen repeatedly without the schools knowledge. But, if other pupils have been educated to know a) it is serious and wrong and b) what to do if they see it happen, then that child could be saved from severe and persistent bullying. I am head of year 10. I had an incident a few weeks ago where pupils where grabbing at other pupils in a sexually innapropriate way. The action was exclusion, meeting with parents and an assembly on consent. The assembly covered examples that were not linked to the incident. The incident wasn't mentioned or referenced at all. Victims were forewarned and didn't attend the assembly. Perpetrators were forewarned but did. The social power of the assembly has been incredible. The victims are empowered and supported by peers and everyone knows that they did nothing wrong. It might sound scary, but any school worth it's salt would educate the whole cohort, not just punish the perpetrators.

This would be considered a sexual assault if it happened in a bar by an adult.

If this is the 2nd attack that they have not dealt appropriately with i would be writing to the head of governors to request a review of the bullying policy.

If it is available on the website i would look through and highlight the relevant information and speak to the head on monday quoting their own policy back at them.

I second the C0ount - this should be what happens. In the school in which I worked there were several students who would actively aim to be externally excluded, because it meant they could stay at home and watch TV all day unsupervised (yeah yeah, there's meant to be supervisory visits/OOS education etc etc, but we all know there's no budget for this and kids are left to their own devices when excluded).

In the cases where students were excluded to a different school in area, there were far better results. Unfortunately rural area meant that there's only two schools within 30 miles, so once you'd been excluded from both, that was pretty much it!

I was going to say I'd be looking at changing schools but I see your DC only has 2 terms left so probably not a practical solution

I'd also be sitting outside the HT's office on Monday until I got a satisfactory solution.

Good luck

This is absolutely awful op. Sadly it does often depend upon the attitude of the school. I moved my grandson from a school with a light touch regarding bullying to a Catholic school where external exclusion was used regularly along with mention of the Pupil Referral Unit.

The Head had a very, very difficult year and took a firm approach. I know of one child who was excluded for a week for less than this and in fact was moved to another school for some time. Her strident approach earned her the respect of the parents and I never encountered the bitchiness and cliques of the previous school. It was renowned as an excellent school and very caring.

I am wondering whether this is the school for your child op. I think this is the absolute worst kind of cruelty and the child involved cannot possibly be a first time offender.

I am sorry, but you need to speak to the police about this. Don't wait to hear what weak weasel head says in teacher speak protecting the child who did this. The earlier post from a teacher, does indicate you should speak to the police as well.

Serious as it's sexual assault. You can go to the police if you choose to.
I hope your dc are ok.

Thankfully underwater stayed in place. I’m sure mine would have gone with the clothing 😖

Exclusion? They’re teenagers, it probably sounds like a treat!

I like what one poster said happens at their school, being sent to another school for a day/several days. Making them get to a different school, being ‘new’ etc. Far better than a couple of days at home! But obviously that takes cooperation & organisation between a couple of schools, so it won’t be happening anytime soon if not already in place.

I’m not sure if schools are ‘allowed’ to do it, but I think a very lengthy project over the Christmas Holidays and if it’s not done to a decent standard, then lunchtime detentions every day of the new term, until half term.

As for DC going in on Monday, they need to sort out their ‘It was a pair of knickers/pants, get over it for god sake’ act. If they don’t rise to it, the others will soon stop going on about it.

Internal exclusion is much more punishment than external exclusion.

External exclusion, they sleep in, stay home & play games & watch movies. No work. Reward!

Internal exclusion: they get up early, wear uniform, sit in a boring room & get handed work. There is nothing to do but the sheets given to them. No social contact. And every kids knows.

What was the Christmas trip, end-of-term trip they missed out on?

I probably agree half a day exclusion & cancelled trip is too little.
I disagree that this event equates to sexual assault.
Did the 7 kids brought to watch get punished?
A personal apology from the perpetrator(s) would be on my list of what's required.

A not dissimilar thing happened in the last school I worked at. The perpetrators were suspended (externally) for a week.

This is outrageous! Not sure if it's a boy or girl
Deliberately vague for some reason.

I don't think it matters whether the dc is male or female. Nor the perpetrator.

Af my school that would result in an immediate exclusion. Hope your Dc is ok op.

Email the head today. Make it clear that you do not expect the perpetrator to be in school tomorrow and that if they are you will be complaining to the governors. What has happened adorned is assault and should not be treated lightly.

I would take a guess at male, doesn't seem like something girls would do. That is coming from a teacher.

My son has been attacked several times over three years by the same boy. I told school if it happened again I would go to the police. So I did.

Excellent response by the police. Swift and stern. They gave the boy a huge fright and told him if it happened again there would be a different response. School also took appropriate action.

It was the school liaison officer that dealt with it. I don't know if all forces have one but he was marvellous.

Personally I would be ringing the police after the incident you describe.

If you feel school aren't safeguarding the kids appropriately absolutely report it. The governors and LA would be your first ports of call I believe, then Ofsted.

Green they suggested the managed move 2 weeks before for my ds - the one being bullied! They then suggested it because ds was too anxious to attend school after the incident instead of putting in support. They actually said “well there’s no reason for ds to feel anxious - the boy won’t be in for 2 days. And if your ds fails to attend it’ll be unauthorised!”
Fuckers did as well whilst ds attended appointment due to suicide threats after suicide threats after assault they marked him as unauthorised.
So basically ds had to do all the upheaval and change schools whilst the perpetrator got 2 days at home and remaining within his peer group.
He had 6 months of specialist support from Camhs and school Elsa has carried this on as he is autistic and so the “it’s happened once” is always with him.

So yes, schools need to admit things happen and deal with them. I doubt any parent of secondary school children will blame a school for the actions of pupils - there’s always the risk it’ll be your child one day (however small). But they can and should be held accountable for not dealing with it effectively and the ethos this will set for future students.

This happened at lunchtime on Friday. So there would have been about 1.5 hours until everyone went home. Give the school a chance to look into it properly.

There is nothing stopping you reporting it to the police if you wish. The only thing I would say is that if the police start an investigation sometimes they are unhappy for the school to also do one.

You don’t have to print out behaviour policies and sit outside the Headteacher’s office. Just phone in and ask for an appointment to discuss the sexual assault on your child.

Is your DC a boy or a girl? That might impact on the way the school deal with it (not that it should).

o gosh, I thought you meant a managed move for the perpetrator

He’s penn that’s what ofsted told me. It’ll come up in next inspection.