McDonald's customer - single dads!

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Hi I was in McDonald's earlier - this is not the AIBU

It was super busy.

One elder woman said its always busy on a Saturday as "its where all the single men take their kids instead of having to do anything with them"

Daft old biddy.
Shrivelled old hag.
Disney Dads.

There you go op - your work is done.

I do think her age is relevant though.

If she say say 20 years younger I don't think she would have made the comment?

This is even more of an ageist comment! Sweeping, negative generalisation about older women.

Can you not see that this is casual ageism?!

If I was a single woman, a light bulb would be flashing in my head urging me to hang out more at a Macdonalds on a Saturday.

Why is that then? Are these men particularly eligible? Should single men go and hang out at get-togethers for single mums even if they have no children themselves?

I'm not looking for something to be offended about, but if you change the word "older" for any other descriptor (black, ginger, Jewish, autistic, in a wheelchair etc) you can surely see that is it unnecessary and offensive and adds nothing at all to your tale.

This comes up so often, why is it so difficult for people to see it isn't acceptable?

My father fed me on fast food whenever we met. I was always sick to my stomach!

Can I point out you can get carrot batons in MaccyDs

Yeah, but we all know it's just a sop to fend off bores who whine about how dreadfully unhealthy McD's is

Meant to add that's obviously anecdotal.

No but I do remember it being difficult meeting eligible men in the olden days when I was single but then I suppose that was before internet dating has made it easier

'You don't think women worked in the 60s/70s?'

Mostly in mills in Northern towns. The lucky ones worked as domestic servants in wealthy country houses.

Descriptors don’t have to always be relevant, they also don’t always indicate a prejudice of some kind.

Sometimes when speaking it’s helpful, or indeed just more interesting to build a picture of the circumstance.

If descriptors should only be used when relevant, then most literature would become rather dull.

No but I do remember it being difficult meeting eligible men in the olden days when I was single

Yeah, these days if you wanted to meet a single dad, you would log onto any dating site and take your pick. I think for many single women though, dads taking kiddies to Maccy D's isn't really their target market.

Can I point out you can get carrot batons in MaccyDs

That's so they can appeal to the middle classes as well as the working classes

Sometimes when speaking it’s helpful, or indeed just more interesting to build a picture of the circumstance

What was helpful about this descriptor? "older woman" added absolutely nothing to the anecdote.

If descriptors should only be used when relevant, then most literature would become rather dull

On the contrary unnecessary and redundant descriptors bog writing down unless of course you were deliberately adding an otherwise redundant descriptor to a character's speech to show the character's prejudices and bias.

I sent my DH out to McDonald's with the kids earlier so I could study and have a Big Mac bought home for me

My dad met me every Saturday. In... mcdonalds. Yabu

Nothing wrong with a McDonalds every now and then. It's difficult to entertain kids when perhaps you don't have a family home with all their toys and things there. Taking them out is sometimes the best option and in this freezing weather McD's is a good option.

I'm not looking for something to be offended about, but if you change the word "older" for any other descriptor (black, ginger, Jewish, autistic, in a wheelchair etc) you can surely see that is it unnecessary and offensive and adds nothing at all to your tale.This comes up so often, why is it so difficult for people to see it isn't acceptable?

fuzzycustard I don't dispute what you are saying but most people do this and usually not out of malice. It's a way of defining themselves in relation to the world. This might not be helpful and can be harmful but it is normal. The best way to change it is to explain why it's not good rather than leaping on people and making them feel bad

I rarely see 70 year old women in McDonalds. They're usually in supermarkets poking babies and passing on their germs to them.

True maddiemookins. I am a stripling of 53 and wasn't in McDonald's today. I was in Sainsbury's but resisted the urge to pass on my germs to small children there because none took my fancy. Instead I stroked a beautiful lurcher outside the artisan baker. She had such a soft head. I asked permission first of course

limited I take your point. I don't want anyone to feel bad...just to think before they write!

In my defence it is not the first time today (or on MN) that I have felt I needed to challenge ageist references. It seems to be an ism that just isn't recognised...yet strangely it is the one that will come to us all (assuming we live that long).

Oh and 'back in my day' our dad collected us in his car and drove to the pub where we then stayed in the car with a bottle of coke, a straw and a packet of Golden Wonder crisps. It was fab.

I am aware that this OP might be a wind up but I think it's useful in a wider debate about descriptors

Are you asking because you think the women was being unfair on single Dad's. Personally I think she was being. Maybe they went there for a snack and then on somewhere else. Which is a fair idea as you can be in and out in a very short time.

I do think descriptors need to be relevant and not either random (adding nothing) or put in for "comedic" effect (usually the "old biddy" type) or a statement of prejudice and preconception (because they are over 50 their life experience must be like this).