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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you risk it? Foul smelling tan

17 replies

Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 13:24

More of a what would you do.

So, after a really shitty couple of months (which have seen me looking like the ghost of Xmas past, drinking lots of wine and listening to songs to make me cry - thanks for that thread last week btw Grin) DH is taking me away tomorrow on a spa weekend. We're leaving straight after school drop-off. Whoohoo!!

So I've just had a bath, then a shower (I know, I know, and after reading that thread on being more eco-friendly too Confused), shaved all my bits, and go to get my fake take and... it's gone!!

Quick text to DD reveals she took it ages ago and forgot to bring it back! AngryAngryAngry

I've been rifling through the bathroom cabinets and have found and older one with a little bit left which I thought might possibly do one very light coating. But it stinks! As in, not like the normal fake tan smell, but a chemical/off nasty smell. And it looks a bit green on the lower half of the one leg I've put it on.

WIBU to risk it and just go for it, and hope that I don't end up either burning myself or looking grotbags for the weekend (the wine drinking and chocolate eating haven't been easy on the hips Shock)

WWYD? Has anyone used off fake tan and it all worked out ok???

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tendergreenbean · 07/12/2017 13:43

Noooo don't risk being green and irritated! I'm particularly self conscious, but it would ruin my relaxing weekend if I was wondering whether everyone else thought I looked like shrek.

Does the spa have a beauty salon attached as lot's do? I'd cope with being pale for the weekend, but treat myself to a spray tan before going home. Then turn up the heating and sit around in a bikini for a few days after getting home and force my DH to admire my enviable glow.

Or those devil sunbeds won't do any harm as a one off - a couple of minutes of the UV in the winter can do wonders for mood etc. anyway. Just so long as it's not habitual use, or you're not super pale. I do perhaps 2 sunbed sessions a year (literally for 2-3 minutes at a time, I'm pretty pale) when it's getting dark early and freezing cold. I'm pretty sure I don't get any browner but I feel like I am and get a confidence boost. Dr couldn't see any problem with this and couldn't really understand why I was checking it was OK - I know it's not for everyone though.

PinkHeart5914 · 07/12/2017 13:50

Shock Noooooooo don’t do it! Imagine if you turn green for this weekend away, your dh will have to have sex with someone resembling the hulk and your have to walk round like it and people will notice

Can you nip to the shop? But tbh it’s December nothing wrong with being pale

Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 13:55

Thanks Tendergreen

I am booked in for 2 treatments tomorrow afternoon (bliss) then we are going swimming, and I could not subject the other bathers to my translucent glow! I am practically see through - apart from the freckles Grin

I can't go out today for a spray tan either, as I need to wait in for a delivery.

I could wait for DD to get in from work with my non-smelly fake bake, but I'm all bathed and ready. This was my plan for the day! (I could throttle DD right now)

I might have to risk it Xmas Envy

OP posts:
Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 13:57

*Pinkheart
*
But you haven't seen my pale. I look ill with no tan on, so many people say that to me!

Couldn't risk sunbeds (got burnt on the lowest setting once, had a lovely big red apple arse for going on holiday)

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Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 13:58

DS would love it if I looked like the hulk mind youGrin

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tendergreenbean · 07/12/2017 14:26

Go all out, get yourself some ripped purple shorts - tell everyone who stares that you identify as the hulk and smash things if they complain.

MikeUniformMike · 07/12/2017 14:28

If you are going swimming don't bother, chlorine strips off the fake tan.

MikeUniformMike · 07/12/2017 14:29

Enjoy your weekend.

specialsubject · 07/12/2017 14:54

don't do it. Oompa loompa juice reeks anyway, sounds like this one is really off.

no one is looking at you, but if you are green or dyed like a Hollywood fool they certainly will be.

specialsubject · 07/12/2017 14:55

and the people who tell you that you look ill without fake tan - make them ill by issuing a well deserved slap for rudeness.

Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 15:50

I should do shouldn't I Special. It's so rude!

I have done it. I have used the green, smelly fake tan. Even the dog seems a bit put off by it Grin

If I turn green, I'll be sure to post a picture as a warning to others or a recommendation for next Halloween

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loveka · 07/12/2017 15:54

Is it fake bake? I have used it in this state, green and foul. The tan I got wasn't as deep as usual, but no ill effects otherwise.

I have so many half bottles of the stuff. The problem is thatI find the smell offensive.
So I really don't know why I keep buying it !

Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 16:08

*Loveka
*
Yep, fake bake 60 minute tan. I don't usually mind the smell but this is a whole new level of ghastliness.

Pleased to hear you never turned green though!

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TheNewMrs · 07/12/2017 16:22

Check with the spa if they'll let you in if you've used fake tan OP - I've been to a few in the North East that you don't let you in with fake tan on Smile

Flinkyflonk · 07/12/2017 21:20

But how would they know NewMrs?

Assuming I'm not a she-hulk in the morning, I should just look like a naturally bronzed beauty (ahem).

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ShirleyPhallus · 07/12/2017 21:21

I’ve used absolutely green, stinking and completely out of date fake bake and it was absolutely fine! So I’d say go for it. Only stinky overnight then fine when you wash it off

And ALWAYS keep a spare bottle of 3 hour express st tropez for emergencies

Flinkyflonk · 08/12/2017 10:35

*Shirley
*
If anything, my tan looks better and more natural than ever! We might be on onto something here Hmm

(Disclaimer: I haven't asked DH if I smell Grin)

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