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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Homeless

83 replies

Obloody · 04/12/2017 15:10

Hi, so I was kicked out my in laws with my partner and 6 month old today. Went to the local homelessness place, and they discussed everything tried to put me off saying they could offer me a house on the other side of the country. I went ahead, and they asked of there was anywhere I could stay until Wednesday.. so I said I could stay with my brother (on his sofa) he has a wife and 2 kids in a 2 bedroom. They said this was fine.
What's going to happen when I go in on Wednesday does anyone know? What shall i do/say to make them take me seriously??
Thank you

OP posts:
Nyx1 · 04/12/2017 16:11

Trinity "I find it hard to believe OP you don't have a friend with a spare room to put you up for a few nights."

I don't think I know anyone in our income bracket with a spare room and we aren't badly off.

NeepNeepNeep · 04/12/2017 16:11

Well put Xtra. I wouldn't have anywhere to go if I was homeless.

WildBluebelles · 04/12/2017 16:12

I agree that most people are a few paychecks away from financial trouble, but I don't see how that stretches to homelessness.

Well... If I lost my job and could not pay the mortgage, it would take about 3 months for the mortgage company to start possession proceedings and evict me. Staying with friends/sofa surfing is still homelessness- it doesn't always mean street homelessness. I don't have anyone in the area who could put me up if I became homeless even though I do have friends. They just couldn't accommodate me.

MrTrebus · 04/12/2017 16:14

I don't really get this,I work and I'm on mat leave, I have a 7 month old, 3 cars and a husband and savings so very similar to the OP, f I had been living with my in laws and they'd kicked us out (there must be a massive drip feed there) I'd go straight to a hotel (cheap one maybe and book in) then straight online to rightmove and then the letting agents to rent a place. Then I'd phone work and organise to go back early. I wouldn't even think or consider that the council would help me, why should they when I have the means (as does the OP) to help myself.

MorrisZapp · 04/12/2017 16:22

Unless there's a huge back story I agree with Mr trebus. Who knows what the situation is here.

TrinitySquirrel · 04/12/2017 16:52

OP needs to end maternity leave early and go back to work.

newmobile · 04/12/2017 17:00

the council will have to house you or put you in temporary accommodation which could be anywhere in the country at the moment. the problem is the costs involved as you work you would have to pay and the charges for temporary hostel accommodation is expensive. I would try and get somewhere private asap and see if there is any help with deposit's for private accommodation from the council.

Mrsdraper1 · 04/12/2017 17:08

MrTrebus and MorrisZapp
The problem is that doing all of that takes time and if you eat into your savings paying for hotels how do you then afford a deposit for a place? If you are on a low income and don't do well in a credit score then you quite often have to pay 6 months rent in advance every 6 months. It's not that easy.
Also it doesn't solve the immediate problem of where are they going to sleep. A couple of nights at brothers is not enough time to find somewhere proper.
OP if the council put you in emergency accomodation make sure you get your HB application in straight away, emergency accomodation is not free and can be very expensive.
Go back on Wednesday and find out what they can do for you. If you get in to emergency accomodation then you can look at what to do next. In the longer term you must consider returning to work if that is possible and your partner needs to consider that if self employment is not paying at the moment putting in a claim for JSA/Income Support and or looking for a job as an employee.
Have you made an application for council housing? I don't know about Manchester but I used to work at Stockport and the Council housing application used to also put you in the running for Housing Association properties.
If you need a hot meal you can go to the Wellspring in Stockport, they are open every day and also can help you with advice.
I hope you are ok, it's very hard especially at this time of year.
Flowers

MrTrebus · 04/12/2017 17:08

@MorrisZapp I think that's the first time ever someone has agreed with me on mumsnet Grin

retirednow · 04/12/2017 17:15

Maybe they think you agreed to moving into a house in a different area which will not be available until wednesday. You could go back to them and say you need to stay in the local area so could they help put you up in emergency b&b/hotel instead.

chickenowner · 04/12/2017 17:19

MrTrebus I also agree!

If something happened and I had to move out of my home (live with DP but in his house) I would go to an Air bnb for a few days whilst I looked for somewhere new to live.

I understand that it's more complicated with a baby, but if the OP has savings, as she states then I don't understand why she's sitting in a car with a baby in this freezing cold weather, waiting for her brother to get home.

SukiTheDog · 04/12/2017 17:27

Good grief....what a mess this country is in. So, a young mum, her partner and breastfeeding infant are out in the cold 3 weeks before Christmas.

I wish this government would just fuck right off.

Lovemusic33 · 04/12/2017 17:39

The OP may have savings but it might not be much, if she gets housed she will need to buy furniture? If she rents privately she will have to pay a huge deposit and probably wait a month to move in?

I’m not sure what planet some of you live on but not everyone can afford a deposit and to furnish a house.

Nyx1 · 04/12/2017 17:40

Trinity "OP needs to end maternity leave early and go back to work"

what planet are you on? Many companies will not allow this if they have employed someone for the cover period.

FlowerPot1234 · 04/12/2017 17:42

The OP has savings, an emergency fund, this sounds like an emergency to use their funds to fund their lives.

The OP is on maternity leave 6 months after the birth; many mothers return to work sooner.

The OP's partner works but is not bringing in an income for this couple to support themselves and the child they have created.

Confused So the OP has funds, has the opportunity to work, and her partner can increase his work or find new better paying work. What is the problem?

Cabininthewoods69 · 04/12/2017 17:49

killerfiller I'm so with you.

SukiTheDog · 04/12/2017 17:50

Thanks Flowerpot, it’s that simple then.

WorraLiberty · 04/12/2017 17:56

Perhaps ask your brother to write a letter stating you can't stay any longer than Wednesday?

MrsPicklesonSmythe · 04/12/2017 18:00

I'll go back and read the full thread in a min so apologies if I'm repeating or missing the point but I would arrive back at the council offices with a letter from your brother saying you can't stay there as they'll automatically just tell you you can stay with him otherwise.

goose1964 · 04/12/2017 18:05

DD was in a similar situation and was given emergency housing, the fact they had young children allowed them to get on the council housing list and they got a housing association place

user1492877024 · 04/12/2017 18:08

Killerfiller ODFOD

LakieLady · 04/12/2017 18:10

I don't understand why the state has to provide emergency accommodation. Am I missing something.

The fact that that's the law, perhaps? They have a statutory duty to house homeless families with children.

The savings are unlikely to help. With no regular income, most agents/landlords wouldn't rent to the OP and her partner, even if they could the rent in advance, deposit and fees.

carefreeeee · 04/12/2017 18:13

Surely you need to give notice to go back to work early from mat leave - you can't just decide to go back the next day.

Some people here are being rather harsh - the OP has just been kicked out. Yes she and her partner haven't perhaps planned as well as they could have and will need to get better paying work asap - but that can't be arranged overnight. Their savings may not be the thousand pounds plus that is needed up front for renting a home.

And after all, council housing was originally intended for low paid working people which is what they are, so I think they are as deserving as anyone

Branleuse · 04/12/2017 18:14

if your brother is letting you stay on his sofa, you will be classed as "homeless at home", which is not as much of a priority . You need to be careful or youll end up sofa surfing indefinitely. I would go in every day and make sure they know that your brother cannot accomodate you any longer

LIZS · 04/12/2017 18:17

Has p been kicked out too? Agree you need to make plans to return to work asap, that will also give you more ties to the area.