Presents for teachers

[6079SmithW]

I have two primary school age DDs and I am all out of ideas! Without help their teachers will end up with wine (AGAIN). AIBU to ask for your suggestions please?

FruitCider I'm surprised too! I work in care and no way would we or could we accept gifts from service users! Also there's no way I'll be able to afford gifts for teachers when I can barely afford gifts for my own family!

I was shocked last year when many parents who gave quite thoughtful, generous presents to class teachers and assistants gave nothing to the cubs/brownies helpers who do it all for nothing! I just don't get that?

I brought my ds’ nursery teachers a lush gift set (after checking for allergies), a voucher to paperchase and a bottle of wine.

Valerrie

I'm not sure that's true. I've got friends who work in state secondary schools, and they don't do that (I'm a teacher too but in an independent school so it's slightly different). Are we all talking primary here?

I would never expect a gift but I very much appreciate it.

Wine, chocolates and candles go down well. As does a generic gift card.

However my two most thoughtful presents came from a 6 year old and an 8 year old, on two separate occassions. 6yo told her parents to buy me a ceramic travel cup because she had noticed my tea going cold too often. It was personal and touching.
The present from the 8yo was a handmade birthday card, made during golden time. The child in question lived in horrible poverty and never recieved any presents ever. They made me a card because they wanted to know that "I had something to open". I had to leave the classroom and cry.

DD's teachers are getting
these l'occitane candles this year. 100% of profits go to charities which work with providing education for girls who wouldn't otherwise be educated which I thought was a really nice link for female teachers of my daughters.

Most public sector workers are not allowed to accept gifts, Im not. Why do teachers get gifts? And then go on mumsnet saying "hate getting wine," "hate all branded teacher stuff, so tacky! "
Bloody ungrateful! I think it's ridiculous and can't wait for them to have a no gifts accepted policy like everyone else.

My eldest goes to a relatively small infant school, and as I'm on the PTA I've got to know the staff a little.

Could you not just ask the Head for ideas? I asked ours if my ds's teacher would like wine and he was like "oh yes! She likes sauvignon". Another year I knew a teacher didn't drink, so checked with the Head who confirmed she liked chocolates, so I bought some Thornton's truffles.

Usually get the staff room a box of chocolates or biscuits too.

For my youngest's key worker I just asked her straight out "red, white or rose? Or chocolates?" And she replied "ooh rose please!". Job done.

If someone else is looking after any member of my family for a portion of the week/year then I get them a token of appreciation. I still take a box of chocs to the nurses who looked after me so well in hospital almost 4 years ago every Xmas

Most public sector workers are not allowed to accept gifts, Im not. Why do teachers get gifts? And then go on mumsnet saying "hate getting wine," "hate all branded teacher stuff, so tacky! "
Bloody ungrateful! I think it's ridiculous and can't wait for them to have a no gifts accepted policy like everyone else.

Hear hear! Gobsmacked teachers can accept anything beyond a trivial gift, to ask for a bottle of wine just reeks of greediness!

Tokens sound good - especially if whole class and no one needing to contribute if they can't afford to. Home made cards wonderful.

I'm always abut amazed at the venom showed by some people regarding this.
Some gift, some choose not to, both are fine but why do some of the people who choose not to take such umbrage who choose to.

Teacher here, wine is good! Or posh coffee/tea/biscuits. A lovely note in a card or email is always very much appreciated.
I would avoid anything that says teacher on it/homemade food items/toiletries

Bloody ungrateful! I think it's ridiculous and can't wait for them to have a no gifts accepted policy like everyone else.

That's nice dear. Would you like the rest of the public sector to move to having to buy their own resources, or for teachers to be given adequate budgets? Some of you are getting so het up on equal policies and teachers being like everyone else, after all...

Amaried because actually there is pressure to buy them gifts and some people can't afford to or don't want to but don't want their kid feeling crap because they don't have a present for the teacher.
Also they come on MN saying best gift was a throw or £100 voucher and most saying they want wine. That is expensive! They also say they don't want homemade food because hey will dump it, nice . They get paid a lot more than most people and they get a lot more holiday and I resent it because most organisations do not allow it.

Ravenwings I do buy a lot of my own resources actually, I work long hours and use my own car to do a lot of mileage. I have helped 100s of people who are homeless to find homes or shelter, if I accept gifts from anyone I could be sacked.
And don't call me dear, it is rude and patronising.

It also worries me how teachers can remain impartial when they are receiving gifts. Gifts that have more than a trivial monetary value are banned for nurses for this very reason. There is a power imbalance in the relationship and it really isn’t professional to a) expect gifts, b) accept gifts and c) moan about the gifts you are given!

Honestly I don't accept the pressure bit, I have no idea nor do I care who gifts the teacher in my kids class.

They are public servants but why should that exempt them from someone showing them some appreciation if they want to. I also gift my amazing postman. ( drives down our lane with parcels too big for post box when he really shouldn't. And also my bin men who always turn a blind eye to my bins that are massively overflowing. These people are all paid but to my mind go above and beyond so I like acknowledging that. I honestly don't see why this bothers people so much.

perhaps are you paid for all your holidays? Are you allowed you chose your own holiday? Is it expected that you will work while on holiday and/or come in to organise furniture and properly deep clean your office? Is your wage limited to a 1% pay rise that is fought tooth and nail for every single year? Will you reach the top of your pay scale in 7 years and never again receive a wage rise unless it accompies a shift in the core work you will do?

Please don't be so patronising.

The best gift is an email to the head/a note in a card to say that your child is making progress and is happy . Presents that I’ve found really useful have been travel mugs, candles, alcohol (obviously!) and plants. I love recieving pictures drawn by the children or homemade cards.

Sailor no it's generally worse than that actually. No pay rise for last 4 years due to government cuts, increasing work load due to funding cuts and increase in homelessness. Increase in risks to my safety due to increase in high risk clients due to insufficient bed spaces and funding cuts in mental health. Constant retendering for contracts so zero job security. I can go on, teachers don't have it so bad.

Fruit I can't speak for all teachers but an expensive present does not mean the student is valued more.

As I've said the most thoughtful gift I have ever recieved, and still have in my memory box, was a handmade card made during golden time. Using paper I bought. The thought behind it and knowing this child made me cry. It's something I will keep.

And as another poster has said, I can't remember the gift from the parent but I kept an end of year card. The mum spoke about the difference in her daughter, her progress and how her and her husband were so happy. That's in my safe place too.

I'm not greedy or grabby and never ask for anything. Everything is appreciated and I always make sure my kids get a present and that they make a present to take home; however the best gifts are those types of cards.

And don't call me dear, it is rude and patronising.

Whatever you say, dear.

So go on. Should all the public sector be buying their own resources and getting presents, or not buying resources and not getting presents? Just so we're clear.

Personally I'm not into class gifts and would rather have a decent budget. Cards are king.

perhaps the issue you brought up was pay and holidays. You only need to search the internet, read a paper or speak to a teacher. It's far from a bed of roses and those issues you mentioned are present in teaching.

Don't buy a gift but don't get your knickers in a twist because others do.
I bought chocolates, shloer and cake for both the day and night shift midwives when I gave birth. I gave my swimming coaches gifts, my driving indtructor a thank you gift and so on. It's not a rarity and some people do it because they want to show their appreciation, nothing more.

And perhaps of teaching is so easy and we all have it so good go and become a teacher. People who fling the insults are people who would never do the job.

I'd rather not be a teacher thanks. Couldn't bare the tacky mugs and homemade cookie gifts