Time out for a one year old? Nursery issue

[silenceisadistantmemory]

Acceptable or not?

I don't think so. Others seem to think this is ok.

I'm bloody fuming.

It's totally inappropriate to strap a 12 month old into a buggy for being "over excited". I'd want to know if that's a general policy for behaviour they don't like, or a mistake by one member of staff.

Is there any point? Won't they just get all defensive?

I would keep asking OP. If a child has needed to be 'restrained' then there should be a proper record. They've told you about it they can hardly expect that you won't want details!

I think time out is pretty pointless at this age. I only use it with children over 2 and even then only as a last resort. For example if they hit someone, I remind about gentle hands then they go to the sand and throw a shovel full at someone else, then they run over and kick someone's duplo tower over laughing, then they smack me when I try to talk to them...I think of it as a reset.

You won't know unless you ask. I'm not sure why you didn't ask for more details at the time.

No it's not reasonable if you're meaning that they have given time out as a punishment but you're being vague. Putting him in his buggy knowing that he hates it is wrong.

I would ask nursery to clarify what they mean by "over-excited"?? was he just giddy or was he having a paddy, kicking his legs or trying to bite?

explain to them that the buggy is NOT to be used as a punishment as you struggle to get him in it anyway as he dislikes it so you don't want to reinforce that it is a punishment to be in there.

"time out" isn't necessarily a bad thing, but at 12 months it would be more of a remove from the situation and distract with something else.

Not ‘good for me’ at all. I would just ask for more details. And wait there until they told me. Not accusing them of anything, just asking them to explain exactly what happened.

I would ask them tomorrow to clarify why he was put in the buggy. To me it isn't acceptable and seems a bit lazy, distraction would be more efficient at that age.

maybe make an appointment to speak to the nursery manager to discuss what happened and how you want to handle discipline in future.

I would also look for a new nursery, None of the nurseries I worked at had to restrain 12 month olds in pushchairs as a time out. And as a mother I wouldnt be happy with it.

Sorry but based on what you've said no one can possibly say if you are BU or not as you haven't actually asked the nursery what happened.

Just give all the details in the op please

Definitely not in a nursery. It doesn't matter what people do at home it is absouletly not ok for a nursery (I currently manage a nursery and would be looking at disciplinary procedures if any if my staff did this!)

All of the details I have are here.

Sorry it's not enough.

Yanbu. No need for time out at any age, (see ahaparenting for why time ins are far more appropriate) but completely unacceptable for a 12 mo. I'd be fuming too. Id ask them to explain exactly how he was behaving and why they thought buggy was appropriate, if they are vague explain that you will have to look for a different provider if you can't have full confidence in understanding their decisions

Agreed you need to clarify exactly what's meant by this. A baby that age can't understand reward and consequences (i.e. discipline), but I think in a communal situation where there are lots of children to keep safe, a child who is being aggressive (unintentionally so) or needs to calm down in order to join back in with play sometimes just needs a break from things and a bit of distraction. Obviously, if by over-excited you mean he is throwing things or kicking or biting or anything like that, I think their first priority is to keep other children safe and that may mean removing him and putting him in a situation where he can't continue doing the same thing. I wouldn't agree with restraint (as in putting him in a buggy) unless that's the only option. I would think removing him to another room or another part of the room would be the better option, but they may not always have staff to do that depending on what's happened (another child was pushed over and is bleeding, etc.).

No-one, not even you, can possibly know until you get more details.

Being a 1yo in the nursery room and taken out of the room to be strapped in his buggy - Unreasonable

Out on a trip and darting for a road repeatedly so strapped in his buggy - Not unreasonable.

You need to ask them for more details. They may get defensive and say nothing, or they may explain the situation fully. If they get defensive and say nothing then you need to find another nursery. If they explain and you are not happen then you need to find another nursery. But they might explain and it might be ok.

It depends on the context. If they're on an outing and over excited included running off for eg then being strapped in the buggy would be appropriate I think.
You need to ask what happened.

At a nursery I used to work at.. we used a buggy once on a child.whos happened to be 12 months. not for time out or punishment but purely because it was the only thing that would calm him when he got worked up. The mum knew and had no problem with it.

You need to go find out exactly what happened. If they get defensive you need a new nursery and I would be reporting them to offstead

Did they actually say it was a time out? There isn't enough info to go on here. I would have asked a lot more questions regardless if they got defensive, that's your parental right to understand the situation properly.

Definitely not on an outing, that much I know

Based on the details you have it's impossible to say, but YABU to be so mad without knowing the full details yourself.

12 months old - overexcited could mean he was trying to run off, and he could have been put in the buggy for his own safety.

What did they actually say. "We had to put DS in the buggy for a timeout as he was overexcited."? Or something else? You really need to find out the context.

It could well have been for his safety or the safety of others.

As a parent if the response does not give you an explanation you ask. And ask and ask until it is crystal clear. If you're not the parent of carer, then why do you need to know?

So, you have no real idea of what happened and didn't bother to find out before going off?

No one can answer your question OP without understanding what happened here. Why not find out and then ask?

Going off where?