To tell people to keep their f***ing hands off

[SugarNyx]

Twice this week people have come up to my baby and touched him in some way. One woman yanked his dummy out and said ‘lemmie see that smile’ - never met this woman in my life!

Just now, was quietly feeding ds and 2 women came over and pinched his cheeks, tickled his legs etc. They reeked of smoke too.

Why do people think it’s acceptable to touch a strangers child?!!

There are seriously precious people on this thread who haven't seen beyond their own smug, complacent little bubble.
A bubble where everyone must admire their baby from a distance of 100m but no closer.

Lots of people enjoy smiling at babies and maybe even letting them grab their finger. It's absolutely fine.

One day, your baby will be not-so-cute and may even be a thoroughly irritating child who nobody but you likes. Enjoy people admiring your baby while it lasts.
Because it may be very short lived and then all other people will see is a distinctly average child who isn't very cute anymore.

Boucle and what if that baby's vulnerable to infection?

My baby isn't born yet, I don't really like people touching my bump. Pretty sure I'm not gonna want strangers coming up and poking or prodding my baby. Especially if the baby is asleep. You definitely don't know where people's hand have been 😂!
I don't think you're being unreasonable. People tickling baby's foot or something is fine but not sticking their hands near babys face x

EvilDoctor - if the baby is "vulnerable to infection" you just politely explain surely?
It's not rocket science.
I can't imagine even the most persistent admirer of babies will prevail against a polite explanation that your baby is immunocompromised and must not be touched.
Practice it:- "I'd love you to be able to tweak her/his toes but unfortunately that can't happen as he/she is vulnerable/unwell/insert description of choice.
If your baby is vulnerable in some way you plan a strategy that suits you.

Yes Boucle but that doesn't stop some people. I didn't want people breathing on DS1 because it could have put him in hospital. Just ask permission first.

Weird to go touching other people uninvited, babies or not. Couldn’t stand this when my kids were little. Ditto bump touching.

An animal with young will bite or attack someone who interferes with them. It’s basic biology really.

You could build a tower and live at the top of it with your child just like rapunzel

He pretty much does live at the top of a tower now, at 27. He barely goes out. Is it so hard to understand "look but don't touch"? I don't want some fucking stranger touching me either.

If we were like in close proximity I'd comment how cute they were. I'd never touch. I'm very wary of people approaching us I've had one guy try to take my pram and one woman try talking to us reached out to my toddler and she had blood all over her hands. You get a vibe though if they're just admiring. I got pissed when someone I knew yanked my babies dummy out let alone a stranger. You can admire and be nice without touching

I really hated this when mine were young. Even now (5 and 3) some people try to randomly touch them and just get a look.

MUCH worse for me was how when I was pregnant random strangers felt the need to touch my stomach. I had someone I barely knew grab my tits too telling me how much they had grown. Never had to resist the urge to kick someone in the crotch as much as I had to that day.

Touching anyone without their consent, and remember babies and children are people too, is assault.

I see more and more people agree with that. #metoo

Op you need to develop some stock phrases and strategies.

Personally I used to stand with my hands over my bump and push hands away when they went for my bump/s. I slapped away a persistent groper who was insisting I had an outie and pulled my top up to check. No regrets about protecting myself by slapping her away.

It’s horrific that pregnant women, children, babies and indeed anyone is deemed to be public property and devoid of their rights.
Hands off or it’s assault.

I don’t know what your problem is @tinysparklyshoes, or why your boundaries are so bad, but you can give yourself the clap.

All babies are vulnerable to infection, the famous one is cold sores.

Kissing a baby whilst infected causes horrendous problems.

Leave babies alone and admire from afar.

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/mother-children-herpes-cold-sores-baby-kisses-a7868356.html

OP. YANBU.

How old is he?

I think it's inappropriate to touch a stranger's baby, as their immune systems are very underdeveloped. When mine was a newborn we always asked visitors to wash their hands and asked them not to kiss her face. I tried to wash my hands before touching her hands/face/dummy if we were out. It seems common sense. A cold or sickness bug or coldsore virus can make them very ill. I cringed when strangers tickled her cheeks! It felt so intrusive and germy!

I relaxed after about 6 months

Where is this town/city where all these women (headscarfed and elderly no doubt) manhandle strangers babies?
I hardly had anyone show interest in DD by the time she was four months.

Assault for interacting with a wain in a supermarket, feckin hell I've heard it all now.

About this time last year, I'd finally got both my twins home from hospital - one was in for his first two months, home for 10 days then back in for a fortnight with whooping cough. He has a serious illness that's exacerbated by bugs and at that point any bugs would have landed him back in hospital.

I decided we couldn't just stay indoors forever though so I decided to get brave. The first time we all went out to lunch together we just walked up to a local cafe bar and sat quietly in the corner. A mad old woman came over and literally stuck her finger in his mouth. I swear to god i nearly decked that woman, I was so angry.

It's so bad with the twins - even now when we go out people won't stop trying to touch them. It's so weird.