To tell people to keep their f***ing hands off

[SugarNyx]

Twice this week people have come up to my baby and touched him in some way. One woman yanked his dummy out and said ‘lemmie see that smile’ - never met this woman in my life!

Just now, was quietly feeding ds and 2 women came over and pinched his cheeks, tickled his legs etc. They reeked of smoke too.

Why do people think it’s acceptable to touch a strangers child?!!

Maybe you should go off and read a bit about baby development then you would not look like such an ignoramus when you post.

The woman who yanked his dummy out crossed the line and was wrong to do so.

BUT, I had many many people coo over my newborns, especially my DD who was only 6lbs so tiny! I loved people stopping to have a look and tell me she was gorgeous. It doesn't last long! I've discovered people find them cute when they're tiny newborns or just tottering on their feet, that's it.

I've also complimented proud new parents on their newborns and most people graciously accept the attention. If someone told me to 'fuck off' I would think they were vile!

YANBU!

It's so disrespectful and rude to touch an unknown baby - or a pregnant woman. And it's disgusting.

I don't know anyone in real life who is happy about it. You don't touch strangers. You have to physically get the baby out of the way sometimes, what are people thinking.

I am slightly more friendly when it's elderly people, just thinking it might be their only time of the day when they speak with someone, and a baby might cheer them up. As long as they don't touch the baby's hands - which will hand up straight in the mouth!, it's uncomfortable but they try to be friendly.

Is this your first child?

forgot to add: people don't stop saying kids are cute when they grow up. I heard compliments about reception kids just the same (very strange)

Worse is when your DC's 10 and her friend's mother, who we barely know, cuddles her. I could see DD tensing up. 😠

Aww the dummy pulling is bit over the top but overall I like when people talked to and admired my babies.
One little old man asked permission to touch Dd one time, he said he hadn't touched a baby in 40 years or something, he tickled her bare toes and she cooed, and he had tears in his eyes.

My 2yo ds has beautiful blonde curls that every old fucker wants to touch and ruffle. Back off!! He shouts no at them sometimes which I agree with.

@TroelsLovesSquinkies omg that's so cute

DS 27's hair started growing back after chemo this summer, I said, "It feels just like baby hair, doesn't it?" He said, "I don't know, nobody's let me touch a baby for years!" 😂

You wouldn't go up to an adult and poke or prod

Funny, used to get this quite often even as an adult and I wouldn't say I was anything special People would often stroke or ruffle my hair and say things like 'cheer up love' (must have depressed resting face). It seems to have stopped now as I'm either too old for sympathy or people have stopped being so touchy feelie with strangers. I always wondered about it, some people are compelled to reach out, can't help themselves!

I love other people’s babies and always smile at them, usually they like this and smile back, it’s called socialisation. I usually hold finger out for them to grab if they are waving their hands at me. I would never tickle or touch a baby in any other way unless I was trying to distract one when they are howling, then I might tickle feet if the parent is okay with this. Pulling a dummy out is completely out of order.

Yeah, I think you're being OTT.

I can't believe how rude people are. I would never touch a strangers baby without asking.

I know babies are cute and lovely but I'm with you OP. It's weird to go poke and prod at a strangers baby.

My now 2 year old has always hated strangers. He'll cry, hold his breath, pass out. It's very stressful for all of us. Yet no matter how many times I say to someone "Actually can you not touch or talk to him? He doesn't like it." They bloody ignore me and keep chatting and touching his face anyway! It is not okay!

Wow. Imagine another situation where people are mean and cruel and spiteful then I would see your point. YABU.

Make the most of this time of adoration....cos In no time at all your gorgeous baby will be a surly teenager and then everyone will avoid them

There was a story in the press recently about a baby who died as the baby caught the herpes simplex virus from her mother. This was transferred by a kiss but the virus can also be transferred by someone with a coldsore touching the sore and then touching another person or, in this instance, a baby.

I know this is extreme (and unbelievably tragic) but having been made aware of this would make me push a stranger's hand away from my baby as I just don't know how clean their hands are or where they've been.

OP, YANBU.

I work in the NHS, gel my hands before and after touching anyone.

TBH babies are right little germ bags, I would probably want to scrub my hands thoroughly afterwards

YANBU. Never had anything mad like the dummy happening to my baby. Some people grabbed his hand and I didn’t like it, but bit my tongue and just washed his hands afterwards. This was when he was tiny and hadn’t had his vaccinations yet. It was winter time as well, so lots of viruses going around. The dummy thing is clearly overstepping a boundary and I would have said something. It’s not wrong at all to want to protect your baby and want others to respect his personal space, even when he’s tiny. Babies are not public property!

Babys' chubby toes are irresistible - I thought it was the law that they had to be wiggled.
When DS1 was a baby his dummy fell out and someone picked it up , popped it in their mouth 'to clean it' and pushed it back in his mouth . More than thirty years later not forgotten!

It’s actually assault to touch someone like that. Babies are people too and have human rights.

You could call the police OP, and have them all arrested, but I think they’d wonder if you weren’t overreacting, as they haven’t actually harmed your baby. However, you would be correct to accuse them of assault as to touch someone without their consent is assault, and babies can’t give consent.

But I’d just develop my steely glare, and come up with some stock phrases to dish out in those moments.
Just assert yourself if you don’t like it.

You’re the boss. Make a decision about what you’re going to do and just do it.
No need to look for our opinions about it.

Learn to say,
don’t touch my baby.
Keep your hands to yourself
Leave him alone, don’t touch
I’m sure you mean well, but do you know you’ve actually committed assault.

Whatever you’re going to say, rehearse it and then just say it.

These threads always go the same way.

Half agree that strangers are rude germ ridden typhoid mary's who should not be within 3 ft of their precious child.

The other half think its lovely sweet and never did their children any harm.

Since joining mn I avoid babies. Never give direct eye contact. I never mention they are cute. I never chat to parent in case I offend in some way.

It’s actually assault to touch someone like that. Babies are people too and have human rights.You could call the police OP, and have them all arrested, but I think they’d wonder if you weren’t overreacting, as they haven’t actually harmed your baby. However, you would be correct to accuse them of assault as to touch someone without their consent is assault, and babies can’t give consent.

Are you being serious here?

It's annoying but fortunately life has a remedy for it. In 2 years they'll be looking daggers and steering clear while you deal with a massive tantrum in the middle of a crowded supermarket