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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is too much to ask

64 replies

ThisLittleKitty · 27/11/2017 14:59

My friend has just found an exchange for a 3 bed council house (so will be swapping with her 2 bed) anyway the property requires ALOT of work and looks to be in very poor condition (she took pics to show me) anyway she asked if I could help her paint it. I told her with 4 kids it wouldn't really be possible and that I need my own house painting but I do it when they are in bed asleep. Anyway she said when I drop my older 2 to school I could walk down to the house (about 15 minute walk and paint it whilst she's at work! I agreed to it as was caught of guard but now think this is really cheeky. Aibu?

OP posts:

Gingernaut · 27/11/2017 15:00

That is cheeky.

Do you know anyone who could help?

araiwa · 27/11/2017 15:00

caught off guard?

Stitchit · 27/11/2017 15:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tinselistacky · 27/11/2017 15:02

If it was my friend I would tbh.

Ameliablue · 27/11/2017 15:03

Does this mean she is expecting you to paint with two preschool children/ babies in tow?

araiwa · 27/11/2017 15:03

if you have time to paint her house, why dont you have time to do your own?

Whinesalot · 27/11/2017 15:04

Ha Ha. No way.

Say "Thinking about it, I've not got round to doing all I need to do in my house, let alone yours". Tinkly laugh.

It was ok to ask but not to not accept no and especially not to ask you to do it on your own.

Slinkymalinky1 · 27/11/2017 15:04

next time she mentions it, act surprised and say 'oh I thought you were joking'. I'm all for helping friends out but, really? Yes, that is too much to ask of someone with 4 children, right before Christmas, who's own house needs painting.

gamerchick · 27/11/2017 15:05

Text her right now saying thinking about it that won’t work for you and you hope she gets it sorted. With a smiley face.

You’d be off your rocker if you do this.

Ttbb · 27/11/2017 15:05

Why would you agree to that?

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 27/11/2017 15:06

Maybe text her and say you can't help paint but you'll get her some beeswax to polish her brass neck

Thebluedog · 27/11/2017 15:06

I don’t think it’s cheeky asking, but you told her no and that should have been the end of it.

Very cheeky to ask you to walk to hers after school and do it

KinkyAfro · 27/11/2017 15:07

I call bullshit, no-one would agree to that surely

mrsharrison · 27/11/2017 15:19

My friend is busier than me. But she offered to come and clean out my junk room and under stairs cos she knows i hate spiders. Thats what real friends do.

Original poster

ThisLittleKitty · 27/11/2017 15:23

Erm no it's not "bullshit" I was taken by surprise (sorry if off guard isn't the right term) which is why I agreed. I actually wasn't expecting to be asked! So it just kinda came out. And no I don't have time to paint my own house as I can't leave 4 children unsupervised and it would be a nightmare trying to paint with them in the room. So like I said I did it when they were asleep (still got another room to do) I thought she would ask her boyfriend (they don't live together) and yes it would mean painting with a baby and a 3 year old.

OP posts:

Original poster

ThisLittleKitty · 27/11/2017 15:24

I am exhausted I have 4 kids when I drop 2 off I'm not at home lounging watching daytime tv. I'm cleaning whilst looking after 2 kids.

OP posts:

mrsharrison · 27/11/2017 15:25

I don't think you can help her paint if you are gonna have two little ones around.

RhiannonOHara · 27/11/2017 15:26

YANBU. As others have said, asking for help isn't cheeky.
Trying to 'organise' you to do it IS.

off guard is the right term. The person who queried it was being pedantic, I think, because you spelled it 'of guard' initially, like it matters that much.

Mountainpika · 27/11/2017 15:26

I learned years ago not to agree to things immediately when asked (unless if was something I really wanted to do) but to say, "I can't say at the moment, but I'll think about it and let you know."
Then consider it when not under pressure, make your decision and reply as appropriate.

Being non-committal is generally my default response.

cherrycola2004 · 27/11/2017 15:26

Tell her you've given it some thought and it's just going to be too much so you can't do it, sorry

mummmy2017 · 27/11/2017 15:28

Just do the you though she was joking reply.
That way if she pushes it and says you promised, just repeat, I really thought you were joking, and say your sorry but it just isn't possible;.

Trinity66 · 27/11/2017 15:29

Is this for real? Why would your friend expect you to paint her house though? That's really odd

Pengggwn · 27/11/2017 15:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

crazycatlady5 · 27/11/2017 15:31

Is she having a laugh? Why on earth can’t she paint the house? Why in God’s name did she think it appropriate to ask you/insist you do it?

MonumentalAlabaster · 27/11/2017 15:33

When she brings it up you should reply, "Oh sorry I thought you were joking - I don't have time to paint my own house with the little ones around, let alone yours!"

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