Maternity clothes as Christmas presents

[Paperchains1986]

I need a stern talking too. I was talking to my mil about how I need maternity clothes soon (I'm 11 weeks pregnant with my first) and she said "don't buy any, you might be getting some for Christmas".

I don't want maternity clothes for Christmas! I want to buy what style I
like and they are a necessity. I think presents should be nice things I wouldn't buy myself from others. No one will buy my husband presents for the baby for his presents.

Even writing this I know I AM being unreasonable, haha, who moans about getting gifts! but I can't shake the feeling that the only thing people think of me now is a pregnant woman when last year I got a cooking course, books, cycling gear, vegan penny sweets. Thoughtful gifts for things I like. Not necessarily expensive, not prescribed by a list I made for everyone to stick too. I am only pregnant until June.

Talk some sense into me, please!

Maternity clothes are not Christmas presents!!!! I’d Class them the same as say a steriliser or buggy. If you wouldn’t need them if you didn’t have children, then they are kid necessities, not adult presents!

I think this is where you need to get your husband to have a quiet word along the lines of “please don’t tell Paperchains I said anything Mum but please don’t buy her maternity chloride for christmas, she’d love some pampering smellies and some vegan sweets”

FYI Neals Yard do a lovely Mum to be moisturiser set so maybe your MIL could be steered towards something like that which gives her the baby factor but it’s still an actual present for you

Lol maternity clothes not chloride 😒

No yanbu

It’s not like they will last until next Christmas and hardly a treat.

Hi, I completely agree with you. I would have been mortified if somebody got me maternity clothes for Christmas. They are basic clothes you wear when pregant then bag up afterwards. Who would want them for Christmas?!? I would have rather had baby clothes bought than maternity clothes to be honest as at least they're exciting and so cute!
I've noticed you said it was your MIL who suggested this and why doesn't that surprise me! Just tell her you no longer needed any because a friend passed a load of stuff your way (even if it's a lie.)

I didn't wear many maternity clothes and just wore things that would either stretch as I grew or a couple of bigger sizes. Only bought a couple pairs of over bump jeans from matalan and a couples pears of over bump work pants from asda & comfy stretchy non wired bras from asda also, big granny panties for later in pregnancy from marks and Spencer's.
You don't need to spend loads on it anyway.

Or if MIL really stubborn Next actually do a coat for winter where the front panel zips out so you can wear it after and it's reasonably priced. It looks like an ordinary winter coat and its nice. You could maybe ask her to get that or get your DH to pass it along.

pairs +

Arrgggghhhhhhh! I totally get it and, it sounds like she has already bought them so you can’t even suggest vouchers so at least you can choose them. Since having children I have found people only think of me as a mother and forget I have other interests or my own style. I swear for my birthday the only people to buy me anything which showed any thought to me was my hubby and children. It’s so hard through because you don’t want to come across as selfish or ungrateful but at the same time it’s quite hurtful that people have forgotten about you as a person.

I wouldn’t have liked that either!

I don't think YABU. I was 22 weeks last Christmas and my main present from the inlaws was a Mum to be set including stretch mark cream while my DH got tickets for a comedy show! I was hoping for one last Christmas before it became all about the baby but it wasn't to be. If you do get clothes could you exchange them for some nice things that you really want instead?

YANBU, I'd be fuming.

However I'd be very happy with a John Lewis voucher, as then I could chose for myself if I wanted some extra maternity clothes (my others being basics bought from the family joint account rather than my own savings, as I didn't get pregnant by myself and nor was it a de idiom I took myself!).

That way I could chose to spunk aforementioned JL vouchers on something much more interesting that boring maternity clothes!!!

*decision!

OP if she's bought them let's hope she's included gift receipts....

YANBU. what adult wants to wear clothes chosen by someone else? And as you say, they aren't a present for you.

But if she's already bought them, and in the unlikely event that they fit and you like them, you could use the money you would have spent on maternity clothes to buy your own Christmas presents? And if they don't fit or are not to your taste, you could ask for the receipt so you can exchange them?

I received some maternity jeans from seraphine as a present which I’d have never bought myself and loved them - I thought it was thoughtful and was thrilled. Another year after my second arrived I was given a feeding top, again, I was delighted! I think you’re being unreasonable- but then our bigger gifts from family tend to be things we need so I’m always pleased if I get something genuinely useful!

I'm going to be 33 weeks at Christmas, if people must buy me clothes then pyjamas or things I can breastfeed in would be more thoughtful than clothes I'll get a maximum of 9 weeks out of...

John Lewis vouchers would totally end up getting spent in the kids section on DS1 though as I'm crap at buying anything for myself at the moment...

Nope. Not BU at all.
Who wants elasticated waist jeans for Christmas?!

My MIL always buys everyone pjs for Christmas (and other things too, she’s very generous) but I took back the maternity pjs she bought me...

This must be a MIL thing! Mine got me maternity clothes last year!

OP I do feel for you. My MIL didn't get me maternity clothes but I got bibs, bag of cotton will balls, gromores, and a book of baby names. I had ceased to be me and had become the carrier of their grandchild. Twas the end of a good relationship. Thankfully the rest of my family if anything swung the other way and after DS1 was born sent me chocolates, bubble bath and nothing for a baby.

If you can keep your identity you'll probably be happier !

I guess it depends. Regular day-to-day maternity clothes, I'd understand and yanbu, but if it's something nice that you wouldn't buy for yourself (say an expensive brand) then potentially yabu.

And they could last the year - between my dc1 and dc2 pregnancies (9 months), I didn't stop wearing my favourite maternity trousers
They were battered by the end of the second pregnancy!!

YANBU.

I also class maternity clothes as another thing you need because of having a baby, they aren't a luxury and not exactly for you (if that makes sense) and if you're getting those for a Christmas present then your partner should also get something baby related for his.

My MIL has bought me a couple of maternity bits recently and whilst i get the sentiment they are so far from anything I'd want to wear so it becomes a bit awkward as I feel like i have to now.

I can understand why this would be annoying, but actually this wouldn't bother me too much if it was nice stuff I wouldn't otherwise have bought. My DM bought me a Seraphine dress for my birthday when I was pregnant and I loved it. If it had been a grey vest top and stretchy jeans from h and m then maybe I would have been a bit miffed though!

I actually wouldn't mind. I consider anything I need/want/would otherwise spend my money on as a gift and appreciate them.
I'd just use the money I would have spent on them to buy myself something from my wish list. Can't believe people would be 'fuming'. Christ, life's too short just say thanks and buy yourself something in the sales.

Guess it depends on the MIL in question as mines never bought me anything nice or anything him remotely resembling my taste and that's with normal gifts so maternity is prob be given something 'frumpy mumsey' and truly hideous....

even*