to think we need a Mums of teenagers Union or something (lighthearted)

[Somethingfantastic89]

This would be to:

Tell each other what we actually let them wear and watch and buy and do, instead of hearing all the time "ALL my friends do it!" and secretly wondering if we're really the only parent on earth who makes their child miserable.

Share thoughts on how not to go mad every time we hear "yeah sure I'll do it in a minute" and then see our dear teen disappear for a few hours... or urgently need the bathroom... or suddenly remember a missed homework... or feel sick...

To make a list of all the things we need to change so they're happy, all the things they know better than us... starting by who we are, what we eat, where we live, what time we wake up, what we watch, what music we like, how we drive, the choices we make, what we cook ... I'm sure I left out loads.

And much more (suggestions welcome)

I think such a Union would be great
AIBU?

Ugh, teenagers! I’m so sick of trails of dirty clothes left all over the flat.

And does anyone else get assured that, no, there’s no homework but when asked to do something around the house DD suddenly has homework to do?

I look forward to getting my lovely DD back in (I hope) 5 years or so!

willow yep that was my concern too when I heard this!
I will report back when I’ve had an opportunity to test it out

brilliant thread! Can I join? I have 4 (almost 5!) teens - 19,18,15,13 and 11.
To be fair ds (19) is away at Uni but still comes home in the holidays to return his room to its usual trashed state!
11 yr old dd is definitely also in full on teen mode.
I'm not sure I'm going to actually survive the next 10 years!

I'm in, my DCs' catchphrase is "when I've finished watching this..."
"This" inevitably takes a further 3 hours, by which time I've given up waiting for them and done something else, then they appear as if no time has passed and want me to immediately remember what I called them down for.

How about my daughters psychologist... you both need to work on your relationship??? Happy to I reply... Just after she gets out of bed, turns her music down, picks her washing up off the floor in her room and returns all of the kitchen plates and cups out of her room (preferably without the rotting food), gets out of the shower under 1hr 30mins, takes the pitch fork out of my throat and puts her phone down so she can actually face me... Usually, we can last 10 seconds before she needs to message someone else on her phone... As far as working on my relationship with her... Can you pick me up? Yes.. Can you take me there? Yes... Can you do this for me? Yes... Can you do that? Yes... Can I have money for that? Yes... Can you drop what you are doing and see to my needs again? No... You’re so unfair Mum!!!

We already have a union, but they have the numbers and the little bastards are relentless!!!

We chant “love you”, they scream “hate you”
We chant “get off your phone”, they say “you’re on your own”
We chant “pick it up”, they shout “You do it.. you’re standing up!”
We chant “But I’m your mother!”, they moan “YAWN, Pass me my cover”
We chant “Get out of bed”, they scream “I wish you were dead”
We chant “Get out of the shower”, they send back “can you shout any louder?”
We chant “I’m over this..” they nod back “That’s because you’re a psycho witch”
We chant “Good night”, they send back “See you tomorrow for another fight!”

Comrades, my only shining light is the app in my phone that counts down the days until my children turn 18! They will have an 18th birthday party and I will have one straight afterwards!!!

Can I join too please? Two teens and a tween...17, 14 and 11.
I’m loving this thread...I’m not alone anymore!

Anxiety is my downfall...and boy, do my kids make me anxious. I seem to be raising Emo’s.

I totally agree with a pp who said that parents of toddlers are not allowed to give advice on raising teens...that has got to be in the rule book!

I'm in.

Not only does every spoken sentence seem to start OH MY GOD (sigh) (eyeroll), but now the texts start OMG as well.

DD - can you order this book for me?
me - have you managed to do x yet, which you said you were going to?
DD - OMG mum do you have to be SO sarcastic?

Erm, that isn't sarcasm (upward inflection)?

I get the "at least I'm not out getting pissed or doing drugs like you were at my age" when I tell her to stop gaming or chatting online, she does have a point.

I just went into her room to wake her up, it looks like someone has burgled us in the night, I couldn't see the floor for dirty clothes and food wrappers.

Love your rewrite, Isadora!

Feel so at home on this thread. DD has started sixth form college this year and is worse than ever with sitting in bed as long as she possibly can. She sometimes gets in at 1pm and heads straight to bed with her Netflix. 'Are you doing some work?' 'ffs mum, I've just got in. I am allowed to have a rest you know.'

Ummmm. I might be more inclined to agree if the rest didn't seem to be all day, every day. It's no wonder the Pit stinks.

Love the song.

I had the food recycling by the door for DD to put in the green bin when she came home. Bear in mind I'd sorted her rubbish, had her dinner in the oven and clothes washed and ironed at this time. As well as looking after her younger brother and getting her provisional license sorted.

"Do you expect ME to empty that?" "I'm just in from college"
It is a three metre walk.

She's probably complaining to their counsellor right now about exploitation of a minor.

Oh, and she needed a fiver for bus fare. I found £11 in pounds and silver in various places in her room. If its not a note, she's not interested. It's almost like she doesn't believe coins are legal tender.

newbie applying for TPU union membership
1 x 13 year old. 1 x11 year old (girl) already getting in the swing of it.

Longtime lurker applying for membership, 14yr old DD thinks she knows it all already

I got really excited when I saw this thread. I haven't had time to read all as I'm off to work in a mo but will definitely catch up.
All Teenages should be put to work as lawyers for 2 years. They would WIN Every case!

Teenage
Yep I agree mine could argue/twist the truth/debate over punishments, chores, why he HAS to stay on his computer game as his friends RELY on him for Britain!

I'm totally in... If I hear "dad would buy it for me" one more time I might have to pack her bags and send her to live with DADDY DEAREST. It won't be so wonderful then. In a two week span he has spent $2500.00 CND on her for no reason at all... GOD HELP ME

Willow- exactly!

Pp poster has mentioned picking battles wisely, I learnt this the hard way. It's the subject deviation that gets me. When I'm on top of my mothering skills I recognise it straight away and keep to topic, when I don't see it coming and I get sucked in...... sheesh, no words can describe the pain of a relentless teenage rantfest that twists you up in knots!

Oh yes a rule book. And I agree, parents of toddlers need to wait until they're in the same shit boat as us. We've earned the right to be sarcastic (and apparently mean)

A sudden scary thought: If all teenagers have more or less the same catchphrases and use the same ways to drive us insane... do they already have a union? [where is the terrified emoticon when you need it]

Is there a pulling hair out emoji? I'm not emojificient yet!

Teenager
No mores the pity and we also need a 'banging head off a brick wall' one too😀

"Am I ALLOWED to even SPEAK??????" then a sullen refusal to communicate for 15 minutes (he's eleven, still in the junior sulking league)

Or "I'm DOING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

There was a hilarious thread on here a while ago where a woman was complaining bitterly about her teenage stepdaughter's cheek, mess and general teenagerly behaviour.
The mum was absolutely convinced that her three-year-old daughter would never turn out the same because she had been better brought up, had a much more pleasant personality and already helped in the house.
It was an absolute hoot.

Thank you for this thread, it's so reassuring to hear similar things to what goes on in our house. I am watching with interest and hoping to claw back some of my sanity.

Katy
Oh i remember those days helping with the washing, hanging it out with me, sorting socks, baking and 'helping' with housework.

Where the hell did my sweet little boy go?
Now if i ask him to put out the washing first response is "Its not my job ( once he actually said "its yours") and "Whats ds2 doing then?" (Btw soon got put right on the "its your job" part😀)

Two points from a grandmother. Your posts on the whole make me laugh, they think they know better than you but are you not the same people who sneer at anyone over 40's views on being a parent? You know far better! Secondly, what makes you think it stops after teenage? You'll never be rid of them or their problems, your the next generation's Bank of M and D. That's cheered you up now, hasn't it!

Somethingfantastic89 They have the Union of Social Media: Snapchat, Insta, Twitter et al. We know nothing.