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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think getting quite drunk with a baby is odd??

576 replies

Choccywoccydoo10 · 16/11/2017 12:14

NC as could be outing.

So we are suppose to be visiting friends this weekend. They have a 6 month old we have a toddler. They want to go out for dinner and drink then go back to theirs and pop open the champagne. Apparently they have quite a few bottles. My DP friend then said he's going to guzzle the wine and his wife will be drinking too.

Obviously most of the drinking will be when the kids are in bed but AIBU to think you wouldn't do this?? What if something happened like an emergency and you needed to go out or the baby needed something. I wouldn't want to get really drunk while caring for my D'S.

I'm all for having fun and a laugh but a glass or 2 not 3 bottles of champagne and guzzling wine!

AIBU or would other people do this?

OP posts:
Standandwait · 16/11/2017 16:54

and bigger beer wine goggles Grin

kaytee87 · 16/11/2017 16:54

Utter hypocrisy, it’s no different to drinking in terms of what you can and cannot do. So if being stoned in charge of a baby isn’t ok, neither is drinking!

Except you can limit exactly the amount of alcohol you drink, you have no idea what strength your weed is.
You can be arrested for being in possession of cannabis.
You’re mixing with drug dealers (unless growing it yourself which most people do not do)

I don’t agree with being drunk in charge of kids either which you’re saying is the same as being stoned.

Strokethefurrywall · 16/11/2017 17:03

Well this thread was predictable...

YellowMakesMeSmile · 16/11/2017 17:03

There is nothing remotely wrong with getting sloshed with kids around.

Plenty wrong with it. If it was safe to drink lots and still be able to function correctly then the drink drive limit wouldn't be so low.

Neither do people sober up quickly in an emergency, what rubbish. Does the alcohol suddenly leave their system??

I don't get parents who drink whilst in charge of children but for many it's the norm nowadays.

jenp256 · 16/11/2017 17:07

I never felt comfortable drinking when mine were very little especially as my son was rushed to hospital a few times as he has a rare condition.
I was always a but funny about both of us drinking at the same time and we did for a few years were one would drink and one wouldn't.
Now the kids are 7 and 8 we will have drinks in the home when the kids are in bed but I don't like my children being around people drinking, one or two drinks with a meal I'm fine with but things like bbq's and the drinks are flowing we would get a sitter as I don't like my children being around drunk people.

I think your view is perfectly normal.

Anatidae · 16/11/2017 17:09

To think getting quite drunk with a baby is odd

Yes. They never buy a round and are terrible conversationalists

Alicetherabbit · 16/11/2017 17:14

Interesting that people are taking about getting a taxi if an issues, surely if not competent to drive you aren't competent to look after a baby? Older children is a different story. Plus who wants to deal with a hangover and kids?!?!?

lilly0 · 16/11/2017 17:16

It's fine to get tipsy I never drink while DD is around drinking is for going out with my friends then coming back at 2 or staying out.

Sayyouwill · 16/11/2017 17:21

Sounds to me like you have massively drip fed (drugs etc) to validate your AIBU.
Surely the consuming of drugs would have been your first concern, not three bottles of champagne between 4 adults.

Fresta · 16/11/2017 17:24

Babies are really not that difficult to look after. They don't require you to have the same alertness as driving a car! I managed to keep my baby perfectly safe whilst operating on about 5 hours sleep a night for 3 months. A few glasses of wine probably doesn't dull your senses as much as complete exhaustion does.

TisapityshesaGeordie · 16/11/2017 17:37

You know what, I was raised by an alcoholic single mother who's drinking eventually drove me to attempt suicide - and I still think the non-drinking, pearl-clutching, "won't somebody think of think of the children?" types on this thread are being ridiculous.

Getting shitfaced when in charge of children = not ok.
Having a few drinks while in charge of children = absolutely fine.

Holidayaddict · 16/11/2017 17:43

I would & I did. Having a baby doesn't mean you can't have a few drinks every so often Confused

Strokethefurrywall · 16/11/2017 17:45

The thing is, these threads always go the same way. It's always the die hard people-should-not-drink-in-charge-of-children fanatics who come out to decry anyone who dare have a few drinks or get a bit drunk whilst their kids are in bed.

Blimey, I don't even drink that regularly but plenty of times in the past DH and I have gone out to a party and gotten absolutely locked, gotten home at 2am, sent the babysitter home and carried on partying. The risk that something might happen to my kids whilst, and this is the important part, are asleep in bed is so minuscule that it's not even worth worrying over.

Jesus, just because I'm a parent doesn't mean I can't go out and enjoy myself and cut loose FFS. During the day when my kids are wide awake, yeah getting shitfaced probably isn't as advisable, but after they've gone to bed? Pfft. Crack on.

LakieLady · 16/11/2017 18:09

Blimey, have M&S had a special offer on judgeypants this week?

ChocoLeibnizAddict · 16/11/2017 18:09

You have absolutely no idea what culture I’m from. Not that I’m sure it makes a difference

We're clearly not on the same land with the same laws, same attitude to cannabis/hashish or you wouldn't have made your comment.

jigglytuff · 16/11/2017 18:15

Oh FGS this level of dedication to children is just teeth-achingly sweet. You lot are going to be a fucking nightmare when your kids start school

mybestfriendisadog · 16/11/2017 18:17

I live in fear of extremist parents like this getting in charge and passing laws that no parent is to be found in their own home over the drink drive limit of a Friday night!

bluekittykitty · 16/11/2017 18:18

@LagunaBubbles I agree somewhat what adults do in their home is their choice but it doesn't mean it's right and tbh in my profession it is for me to be judgemental on what adults do in their homes while 'caring' for children

Intresting thread how differently people view the subject

mybestfriendisadog · 16/11/2017 18:18

It’d have a good effect on population control!

LakieLady · 16/11/2017 18:24

it is hilarious to go into a pub and have the staff say a bottle of wine is 3 glasses

The standard measures for a glass of wine in the UK are 125ml, 175ml and multiples of either. In pubs, it is normal for them to be small (125ml), medium (175ml) and large (250ml). A bottle is 75cl, so 3 large glasses.

Most pubs no longer sell "small" glasses, so generally the smallest measure is 175ml. Confusingly, this is then called a small glass. You'd get just over 4.25 of those out of a bottle.

So, a bottle is 3-4 glasses, depending on whether you're talking about small, formerly known as medium, or large glasses.

ProfessorCat · 16/11/2017 18:26

I feel the same blue kitty.

Aside from the poor, abused and neglected children of addict and alcoholic parents that I deal with daily and feed, wash, care for out of my own pocket, there are the children who witness binge drinking and parents being obsessed with drink.

When we write Mother's Day poetry and similar activities we see the children who say that Mummy likes wine, Mummy loves getting drunk, Daddy falls over when he has beer etc. It's just sad.

hotbutteredcrumpetsandtea · 16/11/2017 18:31

surely if not competent to drive you aren't competent to look after a baby?

No-one is actually that stupid, are they? You can't see how driving a massive vehicle at speed on roads full of other people is just slightly different than holding a baby?
It's really quite difficult to mow down multiple people or cause a pile up with a baby, for one thing, but many other differences spring to mind.

Frankly if you can't look after a baby after a glass of wine (enough to put you over the driving limit) then you shouldn't be looking after a baby at all. You're incompetent.

hotbutteredcrumpetsandtea · 16/11/2017 18:32

Aside from the poor, abused and neglected children of addict and alcoholic parents that I deal with daily and feed, wash, care for out of my own pocket, there are the children who witness binge drinking and parents being obsessed with drink

Do tell us your job? It sounds like you aren't suited to it.

ProfessorCat · 16/11/2017 18:34

Ahahahaha Grin

I'm a teacher. Pray do tell why I'm not suited to a career I've been doing for many years and have won awards for. I'd be ever so interested.... Wink

Dreams16 · 16/11/2017 18:38

I personally wouldn’t be getting drunk not because I’m a party pooper but I really would be worried I’d go into a deep sleep and wouldn’t hear my own DC in the night if something was wrong that and I also can’t handle my drinks these days and the thought of having a hang over and having to look after my baby is enough to put me off having more than one cider if I were to drink and I guess as I’ve gotten older I’ve grown out of the need to get pissed stage I’m not a massive drinker and never feel the need to grab an alcoholic beverage but everyone is different so if your friends choose to drink then that’s down to them and anything that could happen is also down to them I wouldn’t worry about it not your place to be concerned just enjoy your night