Manspreading - biology or entitlement?

[Undercoverbanana]

They are doing it everywhere. At the cinema, on the tube, at the tennis, in the dentists' waiting room. It's not just the legs - it's the arms too.

I am a smallish woman and I understand that a bigger person takes up more room than me, and that men are mostly larger than me. Is it all that junk between their legs that makes them do it? Is it the broader chest that says "I need to spread my elbows over both the arms of this chair and invade your space". Do large breasted women do it too? (I've not noticed - 30E cup here, so wouldn't understand.)

Or is it "I AM A MAN AND SOOOOOO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD"?

So AIBU to think that they could be a bit less entitled?

Entitlement

Any man who needs to spread his legs that far apart needs to see a urologist

Entitlement

Girls and women are socialised from an early age to value being small, quiet and unobtrusively ornamental. Everything from the way they sit to the way they talk. Boys are socialised completely differently, to be brave, fast, strong etc.

It's a million subtle little things but they add up and so women tend to consider other people's needs more in their everyday actions that men do. They're not doing it consciously, they just aren't thinking about other people's needs / comfort.

What happens when 2 or 3 men sit on the train next to each other?

I don’t know, I probably do it more than my dp to be honest.

I'm perfectly well equipped in terms of genitals and find no need to sit with my legs splayed at 90+ degrees, I actually cross my legs quite often and have never experienced any dire consequences. It's entitlement and territory marking, probably with a large dollop of insecurity behind it - people who are truly confident don't generally feel the need to go around overtly demonstrating how confident they are.

My DH is a big 6"5 rugby player and he always manages to stay well within the confines of his own seat on trains etc. It's pure selfish entitlement.

Mostly entitlement but to be fair DH has huuuge bollocks and I know he would be more comfortable man spreading.

Entitlement and territory marking. Also go in for "willy measuring" displays in workplace meetings.
Usually goes with having "strong opinions", telling dodgy jokes, and having a very loud voice.

Quite a few men, fortunately, do not feel the need to do Neanderthal displays.
They also appear to avoid dodgy haircuts and comb overs and act like decent human beings.

I am actually with my Dad at the moment. He is a smallish man, 5'7", not an ounce of fat on him, 76 years old. He is managing to sit within the confines of his seat with his knees a few inches apart, but not spread wide. He looks perfectly comfortable. Is it a young man's thing?

I have started a thread about this before!

I have to take a small commuter flight twice a week and the f**kers that manspread over me/ take up the whole armrest/ shove their too big bag under half of my seat (that I have left free in order to stretch out my six foot frame and NOT womanspread) are so annoying.

There is one guy who is quite hot and obviously knows it who is often on my flight and I swear he thinks I’m looking at him like ‘wow’ when actually I’m always in the airport lounge like ‘please please don’t let me be randomly assigned a seat beside you again as you are 100% guilty of all above described behaviours’ aargh gives me the rage.

Have had the old armrest fight with him as well, he lifted his arm to rearrange his tousled hair, I took back a reasonable proportion of armrest, he returned arm to armrest expecting to have it all to himself and then gave me the old Look of Outrage and spent next hour trying to push me off! I felt like saying, WHY is it that you think you deserve 75% of our space?????? Dick

My ds is 7 and had started manspreading on the couch. Hes skinny as a rake and it’s a big couch, definitely just taking up space. I picked him up on it and made clear how to share space nicely.
Not that anyone’s asking me, but I’ve seen girls in that position being told to close there legs (skirts, and dresses) so I think girls are conditioned out of it. There wasn’t any reason to pick up ds, he had the space to himself but I’m not raising a manspreader. I’m not above shoving knees together (when I know the bloke in question)

If it's necessary how do men manage to drive a car?

Also try sitting like that (in your own home with the curtains shut). It’s very comfortable, sort of relaxing all the leg. But id also be more comfortable on the bus with my feet up and the driver not stopping all he time, doesn’t mean it gets to happen.

I have huge tots. I have spent most of my adult life taking up as little space as possible. Because basically everyone disapproves or leers.
Manspreading isn't universal to men and certainly my tall broad DH is careful to stick to the confines of his seat on busses trains and planes. It is purely the reserve of aggressive twats who enjoy getting in people's way.

Entitlement 100%.

Yes, it is more comfortable to sit like that but why would anyone assume their high comfort should come at the expense of someone else's moderate comfort unless they had an over inflated sense of entitlement?

Its not biology, because plenty of men do manage to sit normally without taking up their neighour's seat. Men who claim it is biology are just finding an excuse for being an entitled twat.

I use my handbag on them entitled twats, always by accident of course.

Men don’t manspread against other men. Observe them next time you’re on the tube. They only manspread against women.

My husband isn’t a manspreader despite having a hydrocele. The large bollocks thing is a myth.

It’s a mix of laziness, entitlement and asserting dominance. I find women of a certain background (well off Islington types) sometimes do something similar on buses - squashing up against you and taking part of your seat to make themselves comfortable, even though I’m slender, and well up against the window.

I just refuse to move my legs or push back. If they insist then they get my best passive aggressive arms spread and handbag space claim

When I am at home, in trousers, I manspread. Just find it more comfortable. I have k cup boobs too, so I like a decent amount of arm room because I hate squidging them together - makes me even more conscious of the stupid things.

I do squeeze myself up on public transport though.

Boys learn to dominate space and girls to cede it very young. I was in a school the other day and waiting in an area where a year one class were lining up. I was gobsmacked that five year olds had this. Not a word was said, not even eye contact, but as kids had their shoes on and came to join the line multiple times boys didn't join the back of the forming queue but got in front of a girl who was already standing waiting and displaced her. Every girl just moved out of the way without reaction or protest and went further down the line. A few times boys did this to other boys most of whom either stood their ground and the other boy fitted in around them, or there was a scuffle for the space. No girl stood her ground. Not a member of staff noticed.

I'm having a good womanspread on the sofa reading this. Surprisingly comfy.

Used to commute by train and it's rife. I hate the feeling of a strange man's leg touching me so I always give up while hating them for it. Yuck gives me the shivers just thinking about it. It's definitely not biologically necessary. It's usually a power play.