to want to give my two year old the best Christmas ever

[mancmama1614]

When I was a little girl, growing up my parents were really poor. However they saved all year for Christmas and used to spend up to £1k on each of us so we had loads of Christmas presents to open. We made loads of family Christmas memories too (Disney on ice, Christmas Eve hampers, eve-of-the-eve-of-Christmas-eve presents) and I look back on those Christmases with the fondest of memories.
Now, I am in a similar position to what my mum and dad were in when they were younger; my partner earns a good salary (I am a SAHM) however we are paying off quite hefty debts from our hedonistic twenties 🙄 so we are strictly on a tight budget.
AIBU to still go what some people would class as overboard at Christmas? So far the presents I have bought him are about 35 in total, I have spent about £350-£400 (don't count) but still want to get him all the clangers merchandise which will be another £150.
Added to this there will be visits to the santa train, Christmas parties at all the playgroups we go to and a winter wonderland trip.
His birthday is in January and we would like to have a big party for him and all his friends and also buy about 10-15 presents for that too.
Can I just add we aren't taking out any credit for this because I wouldn't be accepted for any anyway
All I see on Facebook and in the news are people only buying their kids one present, letting the grandparents pick up the slack or following that bloody soulless four gift rule.
Not buying for adults this year and me and my partner aren't buying for each other but we are buying for kids of friends.
Does anyone else do a Christmas like this when they are on a bit of a budget? Or any free trip ideas (ideally in Manchester) to add an extra special touch?

MN is really showing its middle-class demographic with all the comments about the OP's parents not being poor.

ODFOD. Working class doesn't always = poor. Many posters have been either or both. And being 'really poor' = things like not being able to heat your house adequately, or feed yourself and your kids adequately. Anyone putting themselves in that position voluntarily because they're saving up £1K for Christmas is an idiot.

And DailyMail you said that 'wasn't smart' - it's more than that, it's dangerous if you're really poor. Just not so in this case.

OP your parents really weren’t poor if they could afford to put away that amount of money.

You’re, in my opinion, equating money with happiness.

If he's only two then you can still get away with some cheap Christmas'!

In your position I would save the money you were planning to spend and put it away / use it another way that will improve his quality of life for more than just a day. Swimming lessons or maybe a family trip away in the summer or something like that.

I always wonder how you too 'the best Christmas ever' next year?

Seriously there only some many toys and games to be played with only so much time to 'experience' Christmas festivities! Why try?

Just buy him things he'll like - the number or cost is irrelevant at 2

I actually thought this was a joke post at first. If it isn’t however, you really do need to focus on quality not quantity as pp has suggested. He is 2 for goodness sake. Don’t set this sort of precedent either - otherwise other years where you may not be so well of for one reason or another, might seem disappointing. If you are determined to continue with your plan then how about taking your two year old to choose some gifts for one of the ‘fill a shoe box’ charity things and make tradition out of it, so at least he won’t grow up thinking this sort of Christmas is the same for everyone. I find this post a bit sad if I’m honest, Christmas is about making people feel special and enjoying giving to people but there are lots of ways to do that. Also, best of luck finding a place for all the plastic tat you will accumulate over the years. I am reading a Marie Kondo and not only does it make me want a clearer house but the overriding message is ‘appreciate what you have and what makes you feel joy before adding more.’ I would honestly suggest you read her book.

Your aim to give your little boy a wonderful Christmas is a lovely one. I agree with most people here that magic doesn't = money.
For me it's the little traditions that make Christmas magical.

When I was little my Mum used to fill the living room with balloons. She just covered the floor in case anyone is imagining something ridiculous. It was so exciting when we opened the door and saw all the balloons😀. I remember when my little sister was a toddler we got a slide ( which was both of our main present). The look on her face when she went down the slide and landed in the balloons was precious. I also remember getting ludicrously excited by chocolate coins.
I actually still do and buy them as an adult

I also think it is good to do lots of lovely things in the run up to Christmas. People try to do too much on one day and it gets overwhelming. We used to make a mini Christmas cake and take it to one of our neighbours who was a very kind old lady who reminded me of Miss Tiggywinkle. There is so much Christmas baking you can do over a period of weeks and it makes the most of the season.

These are all the things I plan to do when I have my baby.

I have a 2 year old and m probably only spending £50 if that on presents. I know he'll get things from our families and I would rather spend time with him than get him loads of material things, which at this age he just isn't interested in. I think it would be more sensible to rein in your buying and maybe put £500 in his bank account (if you really want to spend £1k).

I have really fond memories of childhood Christmases too and we only got one present each. You don’t need all those presents to make it an amazing day. Why not save it for an amazing holiday?

Hi. I can see why you would want to spoil your child, but £400 is over the top. Why not spend £50-100 and save the rest for during the year. We have a similar aged son and are spending about £40 on main pressies, and £20 on stocking fillers (including new pjs!)

OK, @mancmama1614, let’s say you spend all that money, and give your little boy the best Christmas ever - what happens next year? And the year after? Where does it all end? And how will you afford it?

As many others have said - at only 2 he isn’t going to appreciate tons of presents - and he might even be over-faced and upset by too many things. If he is up to his knees in toys, how will he be able to enjoy each thing?

I know it is wonderful to be generous to your children - and there is nothing wrong in enjoying getting them something special - but I honestly don’t think it is about the volume of gifts, or the cost - it’s about the right present.

I know you have done most of this year’s present-buying, but if I were you, next year I’d get him some small things, and maybe a big toy that he will love for years - like a really good climbing frame. He’ll get years of enjoyment from that, so it is worth spending what you can afford on it.

You're already paying off heavy debts from your hedonistic 20s.

Now you're going to be paying off heavy debts from your hedonistic 30s from buying a pile of crap for a child who wont remember or appreciate it.

Buy him ALL the Clangers merchandise on top of everything else. Not just one or two things from the Clangers, all of it. What does a 2 year old boy want with a pile of pink knitted mice? They all mostly look the same save for small features.

I agree with get him a climbing frame, a trike, a slide, a sandpit but then not all at once.

What was he want with a pile of bits.

Your parents weren't poor.

What you have already bought is overwhelming for a 2 year old. It won't even be fun after about the 4th or 5th present. It's far far too much and sets a precedent for future overspending. This isn't about your toddler, it's about your notions of what a good christmas means which definitely won't be the same for your 2 year old. Then the birthday..jeez! It's gobsmackingly materialistic and way overboard.

With 35+ presents for a 2-year-old at Christmas, plus presumably presents from other family members, as well as birthdays (when the presents seem to multiply once they have some little pals at preschool, within a couple of years, your house is going to be overloaded with cheap, outdated crap, or you'll be tossing it in landfill for future generations to deal with.

I hate the poem too, but come on. There is a lot of middle ground between 4 and 35.

Although I don’t agree with you, you wanting to do Christmas this way is no different from me wanting to do mine my way as both our based on our upbringing.

For me, I did get a few small things and then usually one special gift. I can remember so many of them, how special it was and how much I treasured them. I believe if I’d been swamped with gifts I wouldn’t have had the same fond memories. I want that for my lo and so would tend to get one or maybe two really wished for items and then small things like colouring books etc...

You’re only try to replicate something that was lovely for you for your son the same as I am. We just had two different experiences.

I think he’s unlikely to appreciate Christmas at that age. He’s more likely to play with the wrapping than the gifts. Leave it a couple of years and he will. 35 presents is far too many - why not give some to a children’s charity?

My parents didn't have a lot of money but did like to gift a lot of presents - mostly either cheap stuff, or things we needed (eg clothes) and one or two special ones. I did enjoy it.

However, I think having ALL presents being big/special ones just dilutes it. I understand wanting to make it special, but I do feel that at 2 they simply can't take it in. My 3-year-old is definitely more aware this year. Even so she won't be getting anywhere near 35 things.

Just a tip OP - My daughter is same age as your son (3 in January?!)
I Also go a bit crazy on her as she’s had a rough start in life and I love buying things for her. However last year she did get bored of unwrapping after just a couple of things. So for her birthday, I didn’t wrap anything! Lined it all up on the sofa and her face when she walked in and saw it all..... Priceless!!!! THAT they will remember!!

Don’t care if I get abuse for saying this. I did learn a lesson not to buy so much and I won’t be going mental this year, but I do like to get a fair few nice things for her. My choice. As is yours!

Not really sure why you posted? Like most people (I hope) I couldn't give a tinsel covered shite about how much you spend at Christmas. Hth.

A two year old doesn't need or appreciate 35 gifts, it feels like this would make you feel like you are providing a ' special' Christmas. If so and you can afford it then do it if it makes you feel good, but this won't matter to your 2 year old who probably just wants your time.

You child is only two, yet I am left feeling they are not the one who needs to grow up!

They will not remember any of it. They will not appreciate any of it! They do not care. It is only you who cares!

Quality over quantity.
Time spent together over money.

I was spoiled as a kid and I'm aware of it. I don't want my DD being sucked into this commercialised/consumerist gluttonous show of a Christmas we see nowadays.

Yay go 4 it hun! Whu Carez what the haterz think, he'll luv it!

If 'growing up' is taking umbrance at somebody buying their child a lot of nice Christmas presents, with their own money, then I don't want part of it!
I'll stick to being 'immature' (a laughable, lazy insult by people who don't know me and how I act / my general responsibilities) and you lot who have insulted me stick to your one sustainable, environmentally friendly, practical gift. Each to their own. I'm very glad we aren't friends IRL and I'm sure you are too 😁
Glad I'm not spending Christmas at some of you grinches houses anyway! Night!
(Oh and to the lovely commenters who have replied reasonably with advice and suggestions for fun days out, thank you! Much appreciated)