August baby at a disadvantage to Sept baby?

[peachytacos]

AIBU to think that having a birthday in spring/summer won’t massively affect how successful your child is in school long term?

I completely understand in the first few years at school the difference is significant, as a year is such a large jump, but surely as they grow older it evens out?
I’m ttc no 2 and was speaking to my close friend about it today who told me its mean to ttc this month in case I end up with an August baby
She’s naturally very blunt and doesn’t mean anything nasty by it but she strongly feels that a baby born in August is at a massive disadvantage throughout. I know it’s highly unlikely to happen anyway but it’s made me think.

Thoughts/opinions please!

Pretty odd language use there - 'admitted' implies some sort of wrong doing, there is nothing wrong with planning to conceive in the early new Year. Nor is it particularly 'controlling', it's just thinking forward a few years. My September born baby was a total accident, is that somehow more virtuous than my planned May baby?

This thread is exacerbating my guilt over having an august baby.

We’d intended to avoid it, but then I had two miscarriages so the thought of skipping a month went out of my head - I just wanted to be pregnant again. Hope I haven’t done my DD a disservice (although if I hadn’t got pregnant at that time, she wouldn’t be here, of course!).

Depends on the child and in some way the parents too. I was an August baby - youngest in the class. I was quite sociable and went off on day 1 without a backward glance! I was one of the first to read and didn't struggle academically or physically. My dd is the oldest in the class and is quite shy but doing very well. I feel a bit sad because whenever she does anything well, she is always told "well you are the oldest you should be good" whereas nothing was really expected of me so people were pleasantly surprised!

People will always foist their opinions on you where babies are concerned - everyone told me that older girls really struggle in class - you can't win...just smile and nod! I was just glad to finally have a baby after years of trying and am not bothered when she arrived, just that she is safely here.

My daughter who was born near the end of August is now top of her class and won most outstanding reader for all feeder schools for our local outstanding secondary school.
She has always done well in school and was always been in the top 5 of her class.
The last year however she's caught up and passed her class mates.
She's in year 6.

Being one of the youngest in her year has never held DD back academically.

It is only now at 17 and in year 13 that I am really noticing the difference. She had friends who had passed their driving test before she could even hold a driving licence. She won't be able to get drunk at the leaver's prom, she hasn't been able to get the appropriate work experience for studying medicine and will probably need a year out to get this experience.

With DD there seems to be far more of a difference between being just 17 and being legally an adult than being just 4 or nearly 5.

dd1 born late july is the top of most subjects in her year (year 4) dd2 is early august and struggles (year 2)

I am a Sept baby. Never felt I had an advantage...always felt as if I was the same level as everyone else in my year. I have a July baby and in reception definitely felt she had a disadvantage with being one of the youngest..when she started school she had speech and language delay which held her back a bit, plus i worried she wasn't ready. Didn't want to hold her back a year though as i wasnt sure if it would be the best thing. By year one though things got better..shes now in year 3 and I feel she's doing fine.

I have a reasonably bright but not amazingly so DD who absolutely excelled at primary, both emotionally and socially. I think the confidence she got from it set her up for life.

Sorry, meant to say september born.

We actively ensured our dd was an autumn baby. I didn't want to take any risks. However if we'd not been lucky enough to conceive within the right month/had problems TTC then of course we'd have been happy with a baby born in ANY month!

I have 2 August babies. My DS was young for his age with some learning issues (ASD traits). Massive problems, which would have been significantly less had he been in the year below. My DD is academically ‘bright’ (hate the phrase but you know what I mean). Even though after the reception year she was probably one of the more able children in the class, she didn’t realise. Despite being a hugely confident child at home and in non school environments - clubs etc, she was desperately shy, quiet and saw the older children as much more capable than her. All the summer borns tend to group together due to dynamics fixed early on. So her friends are children she has little in common with and friendships are problematic (not so out of school). Oh, and sport, don’t even get me started on that. I’ve seen the older kids given opportunities at an early stage - extra coaching because they’re good (ie 5 when mine were just 4). They get better. They get more opportunities. So, they get better. The younger ones gets used to being ‘slow’ and sitting on the sidelines.

The results for KS1 (year 2 - age 6/7) are available for last year and provide the results broken down by birth of month. On average the September born do slightly better than the October born, who do slightly better than the November born, etc. The difference then gets smaller each year but realistically doesn't disappear until after high school.

Plenty of stories about bright summer borns outperforming autumn born but statistically they are the exception rather than the norm.

Oh god this could have been written for me. TTC DC3 with two June DCs. I am aware of the research and whilst there are plenty of examples that go against this, I do think it's defiantly something that doesn't help. Struggling with fact that I'm now 40 and we've been trying for nearly 6 months (although having two toddlers makes it hard to DTD). I think we are going to go ahead and try on basis (a). Probably won't happen; (b) December would be ruled out to as if be due early sept; (c). It's DC3 so I think will be carried along by older DCs (d) Our local school has tiny classes at least for the first three years so quite a nurturing/confidence building environment. That said I am definitely questioning myself as to whether my short term heart is overruling my long term head....

I was aiming for an autumn baby, then spring, then whenever we could have one. After 3 years we were talking about adopting and suddenly there we were expecting a summer baby. I wouldn't change her for the world and she has done fabulously academically, but her confidence was knocked a bit by being younger.

Probably mentioned up thread but don’t summer babies get a slightly adjusted scores at 11+ to allow for their dob?

I’m August born and yes I was probably immature for my year group but I did well academically. My July born is doing fine in yet 1 and the August born who just started this year is starting to blend sounds and beginning reading. I was told summer boys struggle, but so far he is doing ok and is not ending additional support like the other summer borns.

It is only now at 17 and in year 13 that I am really noticing the difference. She had friends who had passed their driving test before she could even hold a driving licence. She won't be able to get drunk at the leaver's prom, she hasn't been able to get the appropriate work experience for studying medicine and will probably need a year out to get this experience.

My yr12 end of August born so

It is only now at 17 and in year 13 that I am really noticing the difference. She had friends who had passed their driving test before she could even hold a driving licence. She won't be able to get drunk at the leaver's prom, she hasn't been able to get the appropriate work experience for studying medicine and will probably need a year out to get this experience.

My yr12 end of August born son is in the same situation - his friends are learning to drive, looking forward to a drink at the prom - he's not happy bless him!

A lot of summer born DS's friends got P/T jobs at 16 so the autumn born ones had loads more money than him too. They worked all summer after the GCSEs ended in June before starting 6th form in the September.

I think it does get a bit when you are the last to do everything, and the novelty has well and truly gone for your peers who have been doing everything for ages.

We could all consider it, but theres no guarantees in life you'll land on a due date anyway (god forbid) but my first came in June and she was due September.
(Still just as impatient now)

I’m 21 so my opinion will probably differ as I can’t comment on school progression

Yes they legally have to go clubbing later & might miss out on some nights out but it’s not that serious at 18. There’s better nights out to come (or they could borrow someone’s id lol). Pre drinks/house parties are the best part of the night half of the time anyway which they can still go to. Driving isn’t really an issue imo as they’ll learn months later not years, in the grand scheme of life they’re not missing out. I passed my test at 18 and most of my friends did at the same general age, no one was ‘late’.

None of that matters once their 18th passes though, their mates won’t retire from clubbing at 18.5? Now that I’m getting older it just feels like summer babies are 18,19 etc for longer. They’ll be younger at work/uni but still be on the same level as everyone else if you see what I’m saying? Because your peer group grows and isn’t confined by the academic year anymore. Sometimes I feel old being 21 while my friends are 20 so if anything they’re at a slight advantage

In my experience, I don’t think it matters in the end

Mine were June n July babies but left them til 5 before starting school. Am in ireland though where a lot of summer babies wait til 5. ( tho u do end up with massive age gaps in classes which can b an issue too but am happy mine are at the older end) saying that my ds 10 is oldest in his class & but no where near the most mature so glad he not the year ahead!

I think my august daughter has been affected less than the just sneaking into summer statistics boy I have who I think was massively disadavatge in early school years.

However having moved to Wales, which was never on the cards when the were born, where sitting exams early is very much the norm daughter will be sitting some GCSE exams at 14 but will still be compared against those sitting at normal time who are 16.

Hard to see how that isn't going to be a disadvantage to her.

I was the youngest in my year at school and I did excellently. It’s not the end of the world.

Just to clarify on a post up-thread, where someone said you had to go straight in to year 1 if you wanted to delay school start - this is absolutely not the case if your child is summer born.

No child has to go to school until they are compulsory school age (which is 5)

Under the admissions code, if your child is summer-born (born after April), you have the right to apply for a reception start at Compulsory School Age.

The Local Authority have to consider whether it is in the best interests of the individual summer born child who is starting at CSA, to go into YR or Y1. (they can't have a blanket policy)

I have done loads of research. Despite many schools claims to be able to accommodate the youngest and the oldest - statistics show a decrease in academic "performance" by birth month over the academic year.

Link

Wikipedia Link

Link

They also show that summer-born children are more likely to be diagnosed as special educational needs, or as having ADHD.

There is a really good facebook group for parents of summer born children considering delaying reception start (or considering starting in their "expected" cohort - but starting part time or later in the year), called Flexible School Admissions for Summer Borns.