Would you let your six year old have an eye test with a smear person whilst you were in different room also having an eye test?

[Bartenderandthethief]

As the title says, would you?

I wouldn’t want my 6 year old child to have a medical exam without me present. I would let my 6 year old go into a small shop on their own to buy sweets or a newspaper, I’m not worried about strangers.

Teens having privacy is a different issue.

I work in an optometrists and I would say it is much better to have an adult present the optometrist needs to know optical family history and medication taken (if any) medical conditions etc not something a 6yr old could answer probably. Also many children want glasses and tell parents they can’t see when they can then when an optometrist finds no visual problems they then spend 10 mins plus explaining to the parent the situation, if the parent is in the test they can generally see the situation for what it is. All employees are police checked but our male optometrist always has door open if alone with a young teen for his safety.

On a side note it also very difficult if you take siblings into the room as well because they distract the one having the test by talking, fidgeting, crying or they answer for them.

Oops I am in NZ so bit different here I guess, but have also worked in the UK.

Babieseverywhere I take it you never leave your DC with male members of your family then.

My kids are never left with a male person on their own. This includes strangers, friends and family.

My mother did the same with my siblings and I. It is safer that way and any male who objected to this rule is someone who I would carefully watch.

It is an easy way to keep your kids safe, why would you risk it when it is completely unnecessary risk to take.

Your poor kids!

I hope you have no sons?

Even their father?!

You never leave your children with their father Babies ?

If you have two sons a few years apart would you leave them alone together at say 10 and 14?

Your plan sounds unworkable unless you want to raise very confused/ paranoid humans!

Yes, my safe totally supervised kids including my son. Better safe than sorry. Some risks are avoidable and I chose to avoid them.

Just like my kids wear seat belts, cycle helmets and other safety gear. Being left unsupervised with a man is a risk factor....look at the crime rates and look at the me too hashtag.

Babies do you really not leave your son alone with his father, ever?

You can’t see how bringing your son up to believe he is a risk to women is a dangerous attitude?

I’d be surprised an opticians would conduct a test without a parent or guardian there.
I’d want to be present for any medical appointment / tests my son is having until he’s at an age that he asks me not to be.

Of course I would.

I feel sorry for people who see paedophiles around every corner.

It must be so limiting

99.9% of the time kids are with me or all together with DH as a family.

If course if DH wanted to take one child out on his own he could but he takes all four together...they prefer it that way. So even though he could be, my DH never is on his own with one child (neither am I...always billions of kids around here mine and visiting kids)

I don't understand people who take a risk when it is just a logical rule based on the stats not a personal judgement thing. Of course I trust DH, granddad, uncle, male friends but being nice people none of them cared about the alone rule. Because they had NO deep seated need to be alone with one of my children.

Plus if someone had kicked up a fuss and thought his right to see one of my children alone outranked my safety rule, that would set off alarm bells.

Likewise my kids up to now would of been just as safe without seatbelts in the car, nothing would of happened up to today but I make them wear seatbelts just in case.

It's not the same as seatbelts Babies because all through their lives it will be necessary and correct to wear seatbelts in cars. However at some point it will become totally unworkable for your children not to ever be alone with a male... Especially given one of your children is himself male...

I've never heard anything so batty presented as the opposite!

What if your son himself wanted to do something 1:1 with his dad or grandad? Would you say "no because men are dangerous" ?

Also generally kids get a lot out of little bits of 1:1 time with a parent. Are you saying that you never do that? It's something most parents with several children work quite hard to facilitate.

Babies as your house is always full of visiting kids your children are sociable - do you let your children visit other houses, or do you have a rule that other children must visit you and never be visited by your children?

QueenUnicorn- I think you may have the facts about stranger abuse totally wrong.
Nope, it happens. I'm aware abuse is more common among family but abuse from professionals definately happens.
Yes it's a small risk and if others want to take that risk then I don't judge, but I would not take the unnecessary risk with my children.

yes my DD was having hers alone at 6 and dentist. I used to wait outside with my eldest who is severely disabled.

No I wouldn't leave any of my dc alone in a closed dark room with a male stranger. Abuse can happen in seconds.

I'm shocked at the not leaving a child with father? In a relationship breakdown fathers have equal rights (If on birth cert). To not allow that relationship baffles me.

It is an easy way to keep your kids safe, why would you risk it when it is completely unnecessary risk to take.

Because your actions expose your children to a much greater risk - that they grow up to see the world and all men in it as frightening. This could have serious consequences for their development and for their own ability to perceive risk in a rational fashion.

We take risk all the time. It is an inescapable part of life. As I type this, sitting at home, I take the risk that my house suffers a catastrophic collapse and I am crushed under falling masonry. Is it a high risk? No. Can I mitigate that risk by maintaining my house? Yes. So do I worry about it? No.

....and if I do worry about it, what do I do? Sit in the garden? But then I run the risk of a tree falling on top of me, or suffering the ill effects of pollution. Do I sit in my car? Well, then I risk another motorist losing control of his vehicle and hitting me. Etc etc etc.

Life is full of risk. One of the most important things we can do for our children is to teach them to assess those risks in a rational manner.

Yes, as long as they'd washed their hands.

Really, I wouldn't choose to not be in an optician appointment with my children, but if I knew there'd be no issue and it was a standard check and time was tight I would probably do this.

Yes of course