To not keep dad off school for a dance concert rehearsal

[ToesInWater]

DD is 14 and obviously in High School. She joined a new dance school a few terms ago doing one contemporary class a week. I knew that the end of year concert involved a rehearsal at the concert venue which we were told would be on a Saturday in December - fine. Paid for costume and a “participation fee” and bought tickets for DH and I to attend.

So here is the AIBU. E-mail from woman who runs dance school with “concert handbook”. Lots of info about photo day, venue rehearsal, dress rehearsal (at usual place) and full day tech rehearsal on day of show. Two of those dates are school days for public schools, one for private schools (so one day for DD). E-mail acknowledged days off school required but no acknowledgement that it might be an issue for people.

I don’t want DD to miss a school day for a dance concert rehearsal - it’s a suburban Sydney dance school, not the bloody Royal Ballet. If I knew the deal before we committed I would have said no. DD is obviously not happy as she has worked hard in dance class and wants to be in the show. She equally is unhappy about missing school. A friend’s dad told the dance school owner that his daughters wouldn’t be attending the rehearsal and was told that it was compulsory - no rehearsal, no show. She went on to say that as a former school teacher she knew that nothing happened end of term as the reports had already been written so it didn’t matter if kids missed school - wtf!

Ahhh - DD not dad!!!!

Is she struggling in school? I can’t see why missing one day would leave such a dent in her education tbh.

Education is not just about academic learning. A day off school to do this sort of thing may well add depth to what she already knows, improve her teamwork and deepen her appreciation of music.

Similarly dd sings in a choir outside school and they will be taking part in a ballet ( not dancing but singing). she needs an afternoon off school to attend dress rehearsal and school are supportive for all the reasons I outlined above. A rounded education is no bad thing ( and if she can develop it then universities like that sort of thing on applications!!)

Oddly enough this is a royal ballet production so she will get to see some lovely dancing too

The op's point is that she wasn't made aware her DD would have to miss school, whatever your feelings are on taking a day off.

Op, YANBU.

It wouldn’t bother me at all.

I expect it has happened each year before and you just weren’t aware of it as your DD has started this year.

Unless extenuating reasons otherwise, all independent schools tend to give permission for this sort of thing. Most dance schools/music competitions/singing shows etc give a standard letter to give to the school.

Why are you so worried about one day at the end of term? Your DD’s friends have probably missed days before for similar.

It’s one day. It will be fine.