To spend less than £50 per child at Christmas?

[hibbledobble]

I read the thread where people were talking about spending as much as £1000 per child, and the average was in the 100s.

I can afford to spend a lot, but I don't see the need or the benefit in buying a lot. I plan on getting one large and one small present per child and maybe some chocolate. Things they will play with and cherish.

I don't buy into the consumerist culture surrounding Christmas, and I don't want to raise spoilt children.

Aibu?

I'm getting dd1 a wardrobe for Christmas. She has said that she wants one with a full length mirror. She will get a stocking as well with other things that she's requested, such as nice stationery, smellies, books, etc, but I'm feeling a bit bad now that a wardrobe is her main present. She has asked for it though!

I'm clutching my metaphorical pearls at the thought of us spending £50 each if I'm honest. We don't have money to burn just because it's Christmas. To echo the famous sketch, I remember Christmas gifts being a book or a tape (old alert!) or an item of clothing and I don't feel I was deprived. You do it according to your means.

To echo the famous sketch, I remember Christmas gifts being a book or a tape (old alert!) or an item of clothing and I don't feel I was deprived

How old are you? That's not my memory of childhood .....

I know what you mean OP but there have been and always will be people who do things differently. some people think it's not a holiday unless you are in a 5 star resort in the Caribbean, other like a tent in Rhyl. Do what you think is right and enjoy it.

what i strongly dislike is the mentality that a parent who's spent less than this sum & whose kids don't really want or need anything right now should be racking their brains trying to think of things to waste the cash on

What about other people? My IL's don't need or want anything. Does that mean I shouldn't rack my brains trying to think of something for them?
People want to spend, people would be cut to bits if they got nothing so what do you do other than rack your brains and spend money.

Omg. Your in laws are in the privileged position of not wanting or needing anything. Instead of all that brain racking get them a token gift and donate to kitties with broken legs or whatever

I am wondering if all these entitled people number like to revile were those whose parents bought them everything they asked for no matter the cost. My kids are older now and not one of them can remember what they had for Christmas, what they remember is the experience, going to look at lights , DHs starters that would have fed a village etc

£50 per child but they will get presents from family too so I don’t think it’s necessary to spend loads of money actually better they understand it’s about family.

You are very lucky then Princess, apart from my brother no-one else buys for my kids.

And where is the connection between all the gifts coming from the wider family as opposed to from parents only being the way to understand "its all about family"? So children who get their gifts from Mum and Dad only aren't learning it's about family to?

I think it does make a big difference whether other people buy for your children as well. The amount I spend isn't actually all funded by me, my parents and grandma don't like choosing gifts so they give money to me instead and ask me to choose on their behalf. Generally I get the DCs something to open from each of them, and use the rest to pay for their clubs, which everyone is very happy with eg my dad pays for DD's ballroom (and buys her the shoes for birthdays) which he loves as it's something he used to do as a teen. We are lucky to be in that position though, they are very generous

YADNBU. Most if not all kids would rather have £50 toys books sweets ect from the pound shop to open rather than one of the top of the range toy for £200.

As much as £1000 per child?? Never in a million years!

My kids are older now and not one of them can remember what they had for Christmas

I can remember loads of my Christmas presents and I'm a lot older than your DC assuming it's your date of birth in your username..!

I think some of it is your attitude as you go along. Mine do not get everything they ask for on a day by day basis. BUT within reason they can have what they like for birthdays/ Christmas. The same as when I was a child, so I remembered.

My kids are older now and not one of them can remember what they had for Christmas

Perhaps that means the presents you gave them weren't very good...

That is so very stupid and rude

I'm 47 and I can remember some presents from my childhood.

Oh honestly, does it even matter?! If it works for you and your kids are happy on Christmas Day, it makes no difference if you spend 50 quid each year or 1000! I think it’s totally ridiculous to assume if you spend 50 rather than hundreds your child will be happier on Christmas than others, or vice versa for that matter

And to be totally honest, I think anyone who has to judge/question other people’s choices can’t be completely happy with how they choose to do Christmas in their house, or there would be no reason to justify it and slate anyone who does it differently in the first place.

Personally I spend a lot on mine. My closest friend spends very little on hers. Both households are just as happy and excited on Christmas morning as the other. None of our children are spoilt brats. We all do Christmas differently. People need to stop worrying what everyone else is doing and concentrate on themselves

Just spend what makes you and happy and get over it

Girls World
Superstar barbie with the golden hair
Playdoh
Loads of fimo
Sega master system
A navy dolls pram
A nurses uniform that itched like mad
Those little bath balls with oil in that melted in the bath
Toy post office

Just some of the things I remember getting for Christmas!

One thing I didn’t get was a Mr Frosty! My mum told me Father Christmas didn’t like messy presents!

Things I remember getting-
A red tractor (I don't quiet remember the Christmas but I remember and loved my tractor)
A dolly and a bath - from my Grandparents
Sindy horse & carriage
Sindy car & caravan
Speak & Maths
ZX Spectrum when I was about
Joystick the following year
New bike about
Pink radio / cassette player

I don’t think it matters if you remember things as an adult. I see this all the time about days out and holidays as welll. Just because you don’t remember things as an adult doesn’t mean you didn’t enjoy them as a child. IMO that’s what is important.

A silver cross pram
A rocking horse
A new bike, out playing on it on Christmas day
A pink pencil case
A record player
Sindy house
A camera

migraleve

Exactly right

Haven’t RTFT, only the first 5 or 6 pages, but my observations over the years are:

Children can get spoilt materially, yes, but the most spoilt children (and adults) I know are, quite literally spoilt. Spoilt as in troubled. Spoilt as in having been brought up with a lack of love, spoiled as in being given possessions as a replacement for love. Spoilt as in being given lax rules and discipline.

Children who are given lots of gifts at Christmas ARE NOT NECESSARILY SPOILT. Indulged perhaps, at that moment, but not necessarily spoilt.

Not sure how old your dcs are OP, but it was much easier to spend £50 at Christmas that it is with teens. It was also v easy to spend a small amount knowing I had generous parents and in laws who would also contribute.

Do you think I could have used the word spoilt a little more?