To ask how 'privalledged' are you?

[GiantGapingAxeWound]

Thought this might be fun. I'll start.

I'm a property owner - of a derelict, empty bedsit (inherited) with smashed in windows, so much mould that it looks like the walls have been spray painted black and even the squatters don't go near it.

I'm a business owner - of a failing tiny business which barely brings in enough money to buy a food shop every week, and I'm in debt up to my eyeballs.

I live in a detached four bedroomed house in an affluent and desirable area - in a council house.

I own three cars - all of which are old bangers worth a couple of hundred each, and two of them don't work at all, but I don't have the energy to get rid of them.

I have a massive flat screen TV, the latest iPhone and my children have all of the latest gadgets - mostly all on finance from Brighthouse or put on the Argos card I can't afford to pay off.

I have a wardrobe full of designer clothes - from Oxfam.

I own 61 pairs of shoes - from Primark.

I have regular holidays abroad - camping in Europe, paid for by Sun £9 holidays.

I have a university education - in a pointless subject sociology that I've never used.

I drink champagne regularly - from Aldi.

Council housing is a government housing scheme for those entitled to receive it Like a benefit in my eyes. What's wrong with that?

No.it.isnt! Fuxache.

Do you know how thick that makes a person sound?

I took it as a light-hearted thread but I suppose the collective Wrath Of Judgment sit in wait to unleash. Don't be so bloody spiteful - it's not a thread asking for debt advice. Anyone that has to go to Bright House is in pretty dire straits, and who knows why the debts arose really? It won't be just gadgets.

I hope none of you judgies are debt advisers you'd have clients jumping out of the nearest window in despair.

OP's had her shoes for ages. & maybe her priorities are wrong but a load of people landing in scorn isn't the right way to go about telling someone that

I'm bemused at the video linked upthread claiming that having married parents is now considered privilege.

Britain seems irretrievably fucked.

Well, I had a secure home growing up and was never responsible for anyone else until I was an adult which allowed me to focus on my education (even if I mainly ignored that and spent my time perfecting teenage drama). I had a supportive network which meant when I was in an emotionally abusive relationship I was able to get away before I did marry him. I have a student loan from when they included some living costs so a part time job was enough to ensure I left Uni with only the student loan as debt. I have a mortgage which means I pay less than someone renting. I have a full time job that fits my work life balance. I can cook well so we're saving a little extra each week to put towards our rainy day fund. I'm white, cis and middle class so only really have sexist bullshit to deal with.
I'm also healthy, have both my parents alive and a good family relationship with siblings.
I have a husband who respects me and does his fair share without being asked.
There are things I'd like to improve or I wish had never happened, but I am hugely privileged.

Why thank you Limpid, I do try to be an anti PO in a sea of beige clad Pollyanna prissy pants.

Unfortunately this is classic MN atm.

What is it then, gamerchick? You seem unduly aerated?

what counts as privilege

Free education, free medical care, the colour of your skin (if you are white you are privileged, like it or not) having a supportive family background who help you to make the most of the education you are given and help you learn to make the right choices.

Really basic things that so many of us take for granted. I watched that video a while ago and I ‘checked my privilege’ at the time and I have a phenomenal amount of it. My ‘personal’ achievements are in so many ways down to the life I was born into.

I thought this was a wee joke and a play on the idea of allegedly privileged???

Ie seems like I’m in a great position but actually ...

I liked it OP

Yeah the problem I think panicon is that the OP is actually very privileged in ways she doesn’t appear to appreciate, which has sparked the discussion.

Discussion ? Seriously?
Oh come off it.
This was just a pile in from the collective wrath of judgment and the common place op
Don't dress it up to be anything other than it is.

hey Imelda (!)
I hate the word 'privilege' to be honest especially the trend of being asked to check it.
As my husband said, after being chucked up on by our youngest, shafted at work, stuck between a rock and a hard place wrt the demands of his job and the demands of our kids, how is his white male privilege working out for him? answer: badly
Are we privileged?
Uni - yes - on full grants
House - yes - end terrace with mortgage
Cars - no
Savings - no
Pension - he has a work one
Kindles - yes but screens broken
Holidays - family room or rental local
shoes - one pair each (docs)
compared with peers, doing badly
compared with third world countries, privileged
Desiderata, innit?!

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself

You CAN own a property and be housed by the council. I owned my flat but was housed as homeless. A private let diagonally upstairs had plumbed their washing machine outlet into the rain gutter, and the water came through my ceiling. The ceiling in the bedroom collapsed and I had fungi the size of dinner plates. Environmental Health were straight round to Housing as soon as they saw it and a week layer I had a council flat with the insurance paying the rent. I suspect that the op's inherited property is in a similar condition.

Credit balance:
I'm a graduate, acquired when you got a grant.
I had parents who stayed married for 50 years and wanted to be parents (even if they bickered and smacked a lot)
I'm a homeowner
I'm white
I'm healthy with only minor disabilities
My children likewise. (bright, beautiful, and bloody fantastic. My son even lectures me on his white male privilege)

Debit:
I'm fat and unattractive (that's an objective view, not self-pity)
I'm a single parent. Twice
I'm female

Oh and loads of shoes, but some of them not comfortable

I'm privileged because I went to private school, Oxford, was able to buy a property with financial assistance from my family, earn well and am able to live very comfortably with my incredibly loving DH

Money can't cure me of my chronic pain from a spinal injury, though I am able to afford private physio treatment, I still live in permanent pain

Money can't cure my epilepsy.

I inherited my Mum's pension, but I would have given anything for her not to have died

We were able to afford a lovely wedding but my mum wasn't alive to be there

We can't have children. Money paid for multiple multiple rounds of IVF and fertility investigations, but they weren't successful and I was told by multiple Drs I will never be able to carry a child

We are lucky to have a beautiful home, but will likely have to sell it to find the money for the astronomical cost of surrogacy in the US because my womb doesn't work. We are lucky enough that this may still be an option for us, but I would give anything in the world to be able to get and stay pregnant like everyone else and for us to have the family we so desperately want

Money can buy a better class of misery but it can't buy health or happiness

Gosh. I’m guessing the op doesn’t think this is so much fun now.

bananafish

@Bluntness100
Yep. That went down like a lead balloon....

I'm privileged as I have a wonderful husband and a beautiful son after struggling with infertility for years.

Bananafish your post really moved me actually.

Privilege is all subjective. Im privileged to have a great DH, 3 incredible kids, a good sized house, good family etc. But my DH is in the armed forces and away a lot of the time. My house is an army married quarter, we can’t afford to buy. I nearly lost my youngest child this year and the repercussions I feel daily and the illness is still lingering and causing problems. My family are hundreds of miles away and although supportive, can’t be here with us very often.

I know what the OP was trying to do, it just didn’t quite go to plan!

I own a house thanks to my partner and in laws otherwise I would be about to be evicted from rented accommodation due to clerical errors regarding rent 🙄** not on my own either it’s half his

I am university educated or will be once I finish (studying psychology)

I’m about to buy my first car which will be brand new but I can’t actually drive it yet as I haven’t passed my test and it will be on finance

I have a top of the range pram for my son on pay monthly, so by the time it’s paid off he’ll no longer need it

I regularly get taxis because I can’t drive and I have a disability so otherwise I could not conduct my life

My children will be going to private school after my own and children’s bad experiences of state schools and DPs positive experiences boarding. We are doing this in the belief we will either progress in our careers in the way we intend to or live off Tesco** value food, credit cards and in a Bedsit by the time they graduate in order to pay for it --

We had a cleaner when I was pregnant and had Hyperemesis and because of my disability. We may or may not get another one. This is not because we have buckets of money but because my body is crap

I have been to the opera but Only once and have been to considerably more rock concerts 😂

I can play the piano but had to stop learning as child because my parents couldn’t afford the lessons or to keep the piano tuned

I used to take tennis lessons until my parents changed jobs and we couldn’t afford it any more

I have been outside of Europe on a plane but only once

I buy print magazines and fresh flowers every week and then do the food shop** on a credit card 🙄

I drink nice wine but only when we have guests otherwise it’s the cheap stuff or water

I have a cafetière but drink instant coffee

I never shop in primark but not because I’m too posh but because it’s so hectic it gives me the panic attack’s

I have savings well, unless I need to use them which is more often than not

I have an iPhone 7 bought outright but can’t get a contract for some reason so had to
*
According to the class calculator I’m established middle class but I still can’t find someone to employ me for anything less than minimum wage ish
*

8 pairs of shoes, but only one with heals, and that includes my two pairs of flip flops and my slippers 😂

i left the UK for australia and we have a much better standard of living and are thousands better off
But I can't stop sobbing at the thought of a Christmas without my family.

And it's going to cost me thousands to become a permanent resident (unavoidable).

I have a lovely home
But needing to save for my next visa means I can't furnish it beyond the essentials.

we're moving to a gorgeous area for a higher paying job this month
But I'm worried I'll be bored because the town population is less than 100.

Oh op....I see what you were trying to do. Being honest about your short comings, starting a light hearted thread, not proof reading your spelling. You should have put an apple in your mouth to finish off I also have a useless degree but no shoe mountain yet