To find my 2 year old very intense and feel a bit drained

[toastytoaster]

My just two turned dd is lovely, she can nearly talk fluently and is lots of fun, however she is not capable of amusing herself for even 10 seconds. I do play with her but obviously it would be nice to go to the loo, make a coffee or clean the kitchen once in a while. This morning I was making a coffee to the background of “come on mummy! Come on come on!” I just keep repeating “I’m just making a coffee then I’ll come and play” over and over. It’s tiring. It’s probably more tiring as I have a non sleeping 4m old.

I really feel like my head will explode sometimes and am using tv far more than I’d like. We do go out every morning for walks or to groups etc and that’s fine so it’s mainly the afternoons.

Anyone been through this and can tell me when I might be able to leave her side without her whinging? I should add she’s happy and confident at playgroup etc and barely notices I’m there so it’s only at home she’s like this.

All very normal although incredibly draining. In my experience (and you won’t want to hear this) it’s gets worse at 3 but in the last 6 months my just turned 4 year old is getting better at playing on his own. However now I have his 1 year old sister to entertain instead. You just need to accept that the kitchen won’t get tidied, and your coffees will go cold but just keep repeating the mantra “it’s just a phase” Good luck.

can you try giving her specific things to do even if they don't need doing
eg 'Come on Mummy'
'I'm just getting a coffee. Why don't you go and find x book/yellow teddy/y puzzle and get things ready and I'll be along to play in a minute'

Or I'm just sorting out your brother/sister can you go and find me his red socks etc.

She may then get distracted whilst hunting and give oyu 5 minutes. It will also help her start being a bit more independent.

Yup, mine got better around 4ish and at 6 can occupy himself for ages although he does still prefer being played with. Fortunately he has a little brother for that!

DS2 on the other hand has always been a potterer and happy to be left to his own devices.

We found that having baby number 2 actually diluted DS1 and made him less intense and the whole family was happier.

I was going to write a similar post yesterday. My DD is 3.8 but has developmental delays. Hoping it gets better! At least at 3 you can pack them off to preschool for a bit!

My DS1 was like this, I started taking him to a pre school where he did between 1 hour and 3 hours without me and he loved it. We did a lot of groups together and it encouraged him to have me involved in everything, pre school taught him he was ok to play without me. Maybe you need something like this?

Yes we’re looking to start her in pre school
In January for a couple of mornings.

It’s nice to know others have been through the same although daunting to know it could go on for years yet .

I just have so little energy to role play all afternoon at the moment, ugh I guess this is what I signed up for I should stop moaning! I hate feeling irritated but when I have to repeat the same thing over and over it’s wearing.