Bloody hell - Santa blackmail.......

[MintyChops]

So last year my eldest son (then 7) said he wasn’t totally sure that Santa was real so I put a packet of chewing gum in his stocking as we don’t allow it and “only Santa” would have done this. He was thrilled, said he knew now that Santa is real, relished his chewing gum, faith restored and I thought how clever I had been.

Too bloody clever as it turns out. He has now announced that he is having his Santa doubts again, thinks it is just me and his dad and that when he writes to Santa this year he is only going to ask for one thing. A PlayStation. I really, really do not want to get one for all sorts of reasons, too expensive/yet another screen to try to keep him off/ he is only 8/ something to fight over with his little brothers, etc but what the hell do I do?

I have asked a few friends and all bar one have said that they think we should get it and enjoy how thrilled he will be. The one who thought we shouldn’t get it had no helpful advice on how to not get it without confirming Santa’s non-existence, he just objected to the blackmail-style of it. So, AIBU to not get it and if not, how do I get out of it without him feeling Santa isn’t real?

Since when has Santa been guaranteed to bring children what they ask for?

Most parents set their kids' expectations at realistic levels from the start.

No way you should buy it if you don’t want him to have one. If you think it’s ok for him to have it then buy it!!! You can’t be emotionally manipulated into buying a present you disapprove of haha although I do like his style.........

At 8yo he is enough to not believe in Santa anymore.
I wouldn’t try and force the issue.
If he knows, he knows.

Fwiw, I think he knew last year too and is playing it up.

I'd be having a discussion about greed tbh. Explain a PlayStation is very expensive and can't be made. Santa has to make sure he gets something for everyone so he can't always get what he wants.

And in our house Santa doesn't always get what has been asked for!

Ha ha ha! I didn’t think I was a sucker but I really must be!! I’ll be so sad when he doesn’t believe. I remember when I found out it was just sort sort of crushing. I really, really do not want a PlayStation in the house though, he is just far too young in my opinion and his little brothers are 5 & 3 and will want to play on it too and that is WAY too young.

I like the matter-of-fact breeziness of your suggestion Zoe. Now to break the news to DH (who I suspect would like the PlayStation for himself). Actually, maybe he put DS up to it???

MintyChops Sorry but he obviously does not believe now.

Santa PNP
www.portablenorthpole.com/en/home

You fill in details and Santa sends a video.

the questionnaire asks things eg. friend's name or siblings or pet so it seems as though Santa knows about your child.

Really cute! My DS was dumbstruck when he got his when he was little.

I remember my son having doubts when he was nine. He went to bed and was looking out of the window at the local power station lights and shouted that he could see Santa's sleigh. I was thrilled to get one more Christmas where he still believed.

While he is being a bit manipulative I also think it’s not that unusual. All three of mine have said at some point they will just ask Santa for it if it’s somehting I’ve said no to and I would say most of the time Santa has brought it for them.

I would buy the play station. Christmas is the only time mine get things like that. I don’t buy big ticket items like that for birthdays so they have as they became more aware of these items asked at Christmas. I always thought I’d be much stricter about it but ds1 was 8 when he first asked for an Xbox it was all he asked for and was delighted when he got it.

I thought everyone knew Santa magic does weird things to electronics and that's why he never brings any.

A playstation is over two hundred pounds! For 1 child's Christmas present. What games are you going to buy with it? They tend to cost fifty quid each nowadays... expensive present just to "prove" lie to a child that someone who doesn't exist does...

Ah god he's only 8! I'd get him the playstation if you can afford it. Obviously as it's near Christmas he probably sees the ads and is reminded again of the Father Christmas thing so he is expressing his doubt again. 8 is still so young and innocent. I'd totally agree with your dh. Sure you can sort out rules about time spent on it again.

Mamabear love your post 😊

We don't confirm or deny in this house

Dd is seven and firmly believes - despite having an older brother!

My son is nearly 8 and still believes, Santa brings one main thing on his list and then fun stuff, when he got a PlayStation last year it came from us- (he is not the kind of child who would play all day long on it in fact he rarely plays it as loves being outside)

Smart kid. He’s testing how far you’re willing to go to maintain the story.

It’s getting a bit Story of the Fisherman’s Wife though. If he wants to be Pope next watch out.

Ah see we were told that if you asked for something too big or expensive, Father Christmas hate "santa" would think you were a horrid greedy child and would bring you coal!

I think he's old enough to be told that Santa only fills stockings for older children, parents and family get the main presents. I've done this since DD was 6 or 7.

Santa always puts something in her stocking I would never buy so I can be suitable shocked, this is harder to pull off the older they get.

Get him to write a list, and remind him that Santa brings a little stocking presents from the list. So, oops a ps is too big for the stocking.

Mine never got big presents from santa. I'm paying for it. I'm doing all the leg work. Im taking all the credit. Not some fictional character.

THat's possibly another reason why a lot of 8 year olds no longer believe. There's so many variations. The Christmas Eve hamper that can come from Santa as a pre gift. All presents are from Santa. Some are. Some can have everything on their list. Others just one or two. The elf on a shelf that some have, whereas others you don't need the elf because you should have behaved all year.

Personally I have never had the ‘Santa isn’t real’ conversation with my Mum. We both still get presents from him —my dad— too haha

Santa is an old man, old fashioned and he doesn't deal with electronics. He has a toy factory. No phones, tables, playstation.
OR
yes, tell him Santa is just a way for parents to give some magic and mystery,

Mine never got big presents from santa. I'm paying for it. I'm doing all the leg work. Im taking all the credit. Not some fictional character.

This.

In our family (when we were kids and now for our LOs) Santa is just the delivery driver and the provider of the "Stocking". This works because all aunties and grandparents live a long way away so they use Santa to get the presents to us.
Win win: we keep the "fairy tale" alive for them, but they know that the most expensive presents have been bought by family anjd friends.

OH don't tell him Santa's not real
Oh my that's a double whammy of sadness - No PlayStation and no Santa. Sad.
I'd probably give in to my own blackmailed little soul and buy the PlayStation but do so in some kind of Black Friday electronics deal and then make sure it's strictly limited. I was absolutely against games consoles but DS got an Xbox earlier in the year and hardly ever plays it (which is far preferable to the terrible addiction I thought it would become)

Though I do say what's on the list is a suggestion and he never gets exactly what's on the list, and I say Santa has to get presents for lots of children and it's not good behaviour to want too many things

In the Haffdonga house Santa never bought big presents like that because it's up to parents to decide if it's ok or not to have. For the same reason he doesn't buy kittens or guns in our house even if he did for ds's best friend in his house. It does no harm at all for dcs to know that Santa has his limits and a budget