Did I REALLY say anything wrong here?

[wheresAbobble]

I have a very close friend, she has just got back into work, she has 6 children and single so has been a struggle for her. We've just been chatting on the phone and she was talking about her new job (cleaning) which she does a few time a week, she said how she's getting an extra £80 a week on top of her benefits and how much it's helping her, I said it all makes a big difference etc etc.

She then says how she hasn't told the job centre that she's working cash in hand so getting all benefits still, I know it's none of my business but as we were talking about I said how she needs to tell them because if she gets found out she could be in the shit, all I said, and she tells me to fuck off and hangs up???

It depends how you’ve said it.
If iut was out of genuine concern she could get caught and then be in the shit, then YANBU. And our friend overreacted.
If you said the same words with even tiny bit of a judgemental voice, then I’m not surprised your friend got pissed of. I’m not condoning what she did but I suspect she is really struggling and those £80 feel like heaven to her. No way she wouod be happy to have anyone judging her for that.

You're right to tell her that. She's committing fraud and will face serious consequences when she is found out.

Contact her again, tell her that you will be contacting the job centre tomorrow to provide them details of her situation. That gives her time to get in first and avoid trouble, whilst you can be happy you have done the right thing.

Benefit fraudsters like your friend are the EXACT REASON that benefit claimants are looked down on as being lazy, dishonest low-lifes. Every lying, cheating benefit abuser makes it easier for politicians to justify tightening benefits even further.

To be perfectly honest she may actually get more in working tax credits and child tax credits rather than being on Job seekers as if she can prove she's self employed and works 16 hours a week there's more help there. I don't begrudge her making an extra £80 cash in hand though in her circumstances. That must be bloody tough going.

Flicks kettle on, opens biscuits and gets comfy.

You were in the right op. But as a single parent who works but also relies on TC I wish I could earn a bit of cash in hand instead of having so much CC debit.

I hope she can keep on doing it cash in hand. Poor woman. 6 kids on benefits can't be much fun for her or the dcs. A bit of cash in hand work won't hurt anyone except her if she gets caught out.

Is it legally wrong? Yes. But you do what you have to do sometimes. If it buys her dcs a few presents for christmas or means she can have the heating on more or pay a few bills off then fair play to her.

And I suspect that if she were to declare this income and the fact that she os working she will be out of the benefits cap situation and be entitled to more money ajd help with childcare fees.

On the day where we've learned about the Queen ker-chinging the BrightHouse till, who are we to judge?

Funny thing is, if she declared it, she’d get Working Tax on top. She would be hundreds of pounds better off!

Just this morning I have been helping my friend who is a single mum of 5, and the benefits system support stops after 2 kids except Child Benefit. She gets the same as a single parent of 2. Yet she has 5. If she went to work for 16 hours at minimum wage, she would be £305 per WEEK better off!

So your friend is cutting her nose off despite her face! (She won’t be on Universal Credit as that currently doesn’t apply to parents of two or more).

Unless shes working for under £5 an hour shes not working working over her 16 hours so doesnt need to tell them. May affect child tax credits but even then more then likely wouldnt for that small amount

Credulous What a horrible, horrible thing to say. You judgemental cow.....

Pretend - you have to tell them of ANY change of circumstances that is the rules it's very clear on the benefits forms (about the only bloody thing that IS clear actually!)

You are right and she knows it hence her not being able to deal with it. She is taking some other poor souls money.

she might be getting more money if she can prove she is working more than 16 hours a week

Sorry but I think you are deluded.
We have no idea how old the dcs are but I imagine at least some of them are still young/very young.
She is probably doing a little bit of the side, maybe 8 hours (cleaners are paid about £10/hour around here) and would struggle to do more than that (see time to get to the place, do the job etc in between schools hours).
And of course, it would mean she could find another at least 8hours of work.....

saying she she would better off letting the job center know is just dreaming of fairies and unicorns. TBH.

OP, did she save up the £80 towards a big fuck-off TV, too?

(And a new shed for the goat, obviously).

You are right, she would get into trouble.
However all those disgusted by the woman not declaring the money should get a grip and maybe be more horrified by tax avoidance and how bloody difficult life can be for a single mother with six kids.
I don't condone it but I don't judge her either. I've been a single parent and never cheated the system in any way, I was allowed to earn £15 over my weekly benefits. I worked part time in a pub and had to work extra hours sometimes to keep my job...I effectively worked those extra hours for nothing because the money I declared was taken from my benefits.
I wish I had had the guts to not declare it...My kids may have had a few treats they never got.

we all know what is right and wrong. i understand her thought process and her reaction was probably what it was because deep down she knows what is correct even though it is hard to admit for her. obviously you did nothing wrong. dont worry too much. she will make a decision and she will live with the consequences if caught. sometimes, we want to help the people we love, but we cant always protect them

she should morally be declaring her earnings.

Nothing more nourishing than thickly spread morality on toast

In other news our own dear Queen has a wedge invested in Brighthouse so a silver lining is at least the wealthy still get their cut.

Now has anyone set up the stocks or ducking stool?
Tut single benefit parents......

Funny thing is, if she declared it, she’d get Working Tax on top. She would be hundreds of pounds better off

In that case, all the disgusted moaners on here should be grateful she is saving us all that tax payers money and get off her back.

In that case, all the disgusted moaners on here should be grateful she is saving us all that tax payers money and get off her back.

No, you were right & she clearly knows it

she should morally be declaring her earnings

I’m not quite sure what is morally the wrongest

• Not declaring a tiny income of £80 a week
• Or being happy to see 6 children living in poverty instead (because let’s face it, with 6dcs, on benefits, these children ARE living in poverty).

If I had to chose I would say it’s much more morally unacceptable to see children living in poverty when the parent could make it a tiny bit better y working a few hours a week.....

No one needs to have six children.... contraception is widely available in the UK. Perhaps she should have thought about how difficult it would be to cope before getting up the duff for the third, fourth, fifth and sixth times and then feeling entitled to rip off the tax payer because life isn't a bed of roses for her and the children she chose to bring into the world.