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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have confronted this Oman whenever her dog licked my daughter’s face?

122 replies

Goldenboots11 · 02/11/2017 22:19

Context is daughter is 2 and quite frightened of dogs.

We were at the park today and it was full of children as schools are off here (N Ireland) and it’s still half term.

I was walking to the entrance of the park with my 2 & 4 year olds.

Party of 3 came walking past with their 3 dogs. One of the dogs came over to us and straight away licked my daughter’s face from chin to forehead. I wasn’t worried about the dog biting, it didn’t look cross iykwim, but my daughter was really upset. The dog was the same height as her, so I can see why she was scared.

The owners of the dog stopped and laughed and them walked on. They didn’t seem even remotely embarrassed.

I stood for a moment and thought, hang on that’s not really on.

I went after the owner in question and told her it’s not really ok for a dog to go around licking children on the face. It’s unhygenic and if she couldn’t control her dog it should be on a lead.

The women (age 50/60 ish) made a oooooohhhhhh sound and looked at me as if IWBVVVU

So is it ok for dogs to lick children on the face? I genuinely think it’s gross. My mum who was with me said I should have just let it go.

I was not rude or aggressive in any way but I just wanted the woman to know.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Kitsharrington · 03/11/2017 07:34

perfect example of why all dogs should be on the lead in public places at all times

Oh do shut up.

OP if this is the worst thing that's ever going to happen to your child lucky you. Get a grip.

Orchardgreen · 03/11/2017 07:35

I'd be really worried that my dog might catch something from your child.

whoareyoukidding · 03/11/2017 07:36

YANBU

mamamalt · 03/11/2017 07:38

YANBU!! That’s appalling and the owner had a horrible attitude and unfortunately for you just seems like they must be a complete dick.
I had a situation recently where a dog was running around chasing children who were screaming on a beach where dogs are not allowed. I told the owner (who clearly gave zero fucks) that the dog should be on a lead and a little girl told me off! She said it was mean and when I explained there are babies playing etc she said that babies should be the ones on leads! ShockBlushI had to try so hard not to laugh and tell her she was being unkind 😂

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 03/11/2017 07:46

I've never seen a dog go and lick a random child, or any person. And I've seen a lot of dogs.

glenthebattleostrich · 03/11/2017 07:54

Dogs should be under control when out. I had a German shepherd (who was a big wuss) who looked big and intimidating. I knew he was a softie but other people didn't. He was called back and walked to heel when told, wasn't allowed to wander up to people, especially children (even though he adores them). He was trained to the whistle and completely obedient when out. At home he did what he wanted the big Sod but out he was an angel.

Owners who think that everyone should adore their furbaby annoy the hell out of me. DD is terrified of dogs after being chased and bowled over by some random animal in the park when she was smaller. I explain to people that she s scared and can they get their badly trained dogs away and all you get is 'oh but he's friendly' or ' but he loves kids'. Apparently my response of well kids don't love your mutt so get him is rude!

I do think there should be mandatory training classes before you can exercise dogs in parks etc. They can be dangerous even when they don't mean to be.

ZoopDragon · 03/11/2017 07:56

I would have been annoyed too. It happened to me on a bus once, big slobbery dog licking my toddler's face. I asked the owner to move the dog (she'd plonked him right next to my buggy) and she made a big fuss. Luckily my toddler started sneezing and the lady next to me told dog owner her dog was making him sneeze! She moved with much muttering and huffing.

Fitzsimmons · 03/11/2017 08:10

YANBU OP. So many entitled dog owners who think their pooch can do no wrong. I have a nearly two year old who has always been terrified of all animals for an unknown reason. We have done lots to help her fear, such as spending gentle time with friends' pets etc. But it's all undone every time some muppet thinks their dog is OK to run up to her and sniff / jump at her etc. If your dog does this it should be on a lead, full stop. Nine times out of ten the owner laughs at her freaking out and says something like "oh he's just saying hello, it's ok" NO IT FUCKING ISN'T.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 03/11/2017 08:17

YWNBU. I don't mind little puppy kisses, Grin, but older dogs licking and slobbering makes me bloody boak.

Jasminedes · 03/11/2017 08:20

We do long walks at the weekend with dc. The number of dogs that make a mild pain of themselves - some owners are apologetic, but most are just smiling indulgently at their dog and telling you its only being friendly - I don't care, its the 4th or 5th dog today who has tried to eat my lunch/drooled on my knee/intimidated my child/delayed my walk because it won't come back to you - just apologise and keep it on a lead more often or train properly. And I do like dogs.

LoniceraJaponica · 03/11/2017 08:27

YANBU to challenge the dog owner.

However, YABVVU to mention how old she was. What on earth has that got to do with it? It comes across as ageist.

disahsterdahling · 03/11/2017 08:28

I agree that dogs should be on leads at all times in public places.

People always think that you're being unreasonable to be scared or wary of dogs, but quite honestly it's not all about being bitten. I don't want them jumping up at me or licking me or anything else.

Someone said that it's stupid to require dogs to be on leads because they need the exercise. f you have a dog that needs to walk miles every day, then you need to be fit enough to walk those miles too. If you are not, then don't get a dog that needs that level of exercise. Or lend your dog to a canicross runner who will have the dog on a lead around their waist.

Most dog owners are really good at holding onto their dog if eg I am out running but one did run right at me and lick my ankle the other week. At least it was only my ankle and the owner apologised for his/her high spirits.

misshannah · 03/11/2017 08:31

As a dog owner i would have apologised. I have two dog and both are rescues, i keep them on the lead when walking and do my very best with training which can be hard with a naughty JRT. I do not allow them to lick my face or arms/legs/etc (eww) and i try my very best to ensure my dogs are as well behaved as possible around people and most importantly Children. I try to show children the positive side of animals rather than scare them. I'm quite obsessive over it, as i remember being scared of cats as a child and would hate to think my dogs had given a negative impression of dogs.

greendale17 · 03/11/2017 08:31

Why didn’t you intervene when you saw a large dog approach your child?

^_This. You say your child doesn’t like dogs so why no intervention?

mustbemad17 · 03/11/2017 08:40

I am a big dog person, but even I think that the woman was out of order. I spent ages teaching my daughter not to approach strange dogs without asking the owner/me first...I damn well expect dog owners to keep their dogs away from my child. I have a massive issue with dog owners who let their dogs loose & then do not monitor what they are doing. There are so many issues besides the behaviour of a dog that could cause problems; fear of dogs, allergies etc. And there is nothing to say that your child could have reacted hysterically through fear & startled the dog - a startled dog can react out of character.

The woman was being a prick imo, & people like her give responsible owners a bad name. A lot of people also do not realise just how tenuous the updates to the DDA are; a dog does not have to act aggressive for it to be deemed dangerous. If someone believes it to be out of control or it causes fear, then it is in breach. Irresponsible dog owners put the life of their pet at risk as much as anything.

cambodianfoxhound · 03/11/2017 08:41

Its not ideal obviously but a lot of these responses are hysterical. Stuff happens in life, you can't control everything all the time. Ultimately no harm was done. The risk is minuscule. The dog was obviously off lead as it was friendly and non-threatening. This idea of any dog who is not under absolute and complete control having to be on the lead all the time is ridiculous. Are your children under complete and absolute control all the time? Live and let live and chill out a bit.

Greyponcho · 03/11/2017 08:46

Her attitude stank!
If someone had put a post on here about how a toddler had tried to pet a dog with sticky hands and terrified the dog, there would be swathes of people saying the toddler should be under better control by the parents. It goes both ways.

I used to lose my mind over exDPs laissez faire attitude towards teaching his dog not to jump up at people, he reckoned “no one would mind” Angry as “everyone loves dogs” Confused and “no one would sue him as it’s not America” Hmm no you worthless gobshite, you’d expect me to bail you out

PurplePillowCase · 03/11/2017 08:49

Ultimately no harm was done.
the child was very frightened.

The dog was obviously off lead as it was friendly and non-threatening. This idea of any dog who is not under absolute and complete control having to be on the lead all the time is ridiculous. Are your children under complete and absolute control all the time?

the law is not of this opinion.
only an irresponsible doghandler can sprout this bullshit.

hmcAsWas · 03/11/2017 08:52

I am a dog owner. No it isn’t okay for dogs to lick strangers - child or adult - in the face. We wouldn’t accept an uninvited show of affection from a person unknown to us, so why should we accept if from an animal. I think you were right to point this out to the woman

cambodianfoxhound · 03/11/2017 08:53

Its easier to put on slippers than to carpet the entire world.

Ttbb · 03/11/2017 08:55

YANBU. It's disgusting.

Booboostwo · 03/11/2017 08:55

dishasterdahling that is a silly suggestion and none of this I should helped by silly suggestions. Animals need appropriated exercise, even if the owner were a marathon runner it would not be appropriate exercise for a dog. Just observe dogs running loose and playing and you will see why walking next to the owner on a lead is not sufficient.

MrsJayy · 03/11/2017 08:55

That is gross I hate dogs licking faces they lick their backside fgs. Yanbu and the woman should have apologised.

mustbemad17 · 03/11/2017 09:00

cambodianfoxhound your attitude is astounding. The idea that the dog was obviously friendly if it was off lead is hysterical. So the off lead labrador that attacked my on lead, muzzled bull terrier was friendly yes? How about the numerous stories of off lead dogs chasing frightened children?

The sad reality is there are a large number of irresponsible, idiotic dog owners around. And all it takes is for one incident with a child who feels scared & you then have the potential for that child to be terrified of dogs. Dog owners need to get a grip. And there needs to be more provision for off lead exercise but that will still only work if owners are responsible & truthful about their dog's behaviour!

MrsJayy · 03/11/2017 09:07

My on lead dog was attacked by an off lead dog the other week my(adult) Dd was terrified because the owner was shouting at her for having an aggressive dog, but yeah all dogs have a right to be off lead and bound about