To be disgusted about the treatment of elderly in hospital?

[happilyeverafta]

I’m currently in hospital and on a orthopedic ward where I’m the only patient under 70 (I believe, I’m 35)

The 5 elderly ladies here have varying degrees of ‘illness’ and as far as I can tell none are suffering from dementia just poorly ladies, bless them.

I arrived here last night and the welcome I received was as if David Beckham (insert other celeb crush if required) had walked into the ward swinging his todger around - they were all saying how great it was to have a ‘youngster’ for once. They also added I wasn’t likely to moan or ask for stuff....

The lady in the bed next to me has horrific facial injuries and covered in bruises. She’s 82. She started chatting to me and we had a lovely conversation (I will admit now I’m a sucker for a Nan type figure!). She’s clearly very sore and scared, nurses told me she’d been beaten up in her own home and thrown down the stairs and “to watch out as she screams out in the night due to be scared/nightmares” all days whilst rolling their eyes at me.

Last night she asked for some water and the nurse shouted at her that “you have half a cup we are busy so stop mythering” she explained Ste was very thirsty. In the end I gave her my hug as she was getting distressed.

This morning she was asleep as the nurses arrived on shift - they came in and shook her & shouted to wake her which frightened her she started crying, I then witnessed them rolling their eyes st her talking about her to each other in front of her abs laughing at her, the whole time she is looking at me saying “I think they think I can’t hear or understand them”

They then got her dressed and she was in pain and asking them to be a bit gentler they came from behind the curtain stating she’d made “another Oscar winning performance” and huffing and puffing. Insinuating she’s making it all up.

They then chat to each other in the middle of the ward about how she’s getting worse, clearly has woke up in a mood etc etc.

Aibu or is this how bad the NHS is now with the treatment of patients?! I’m sat here upset and shocked - I’ve not had any obs done or had anyone come to check on me. To be fair I’m ‘OK’ compared to these ladies but they seem so stretched for staff (1 nurse abs about 3 HCA) that the basic level of care and compassion has gone? Or is this how it is on an orthopedic ward?

YADNBU

My MIL was in hospital a couple of years ago. The doctors weren't interested in her at all as there was nothing more could be done for her (terminal cancer). The nurses/care staff left her alone in a side room and avoided doing anything for her. She could be difficult because she had dementia, and was very scared. Food trays were left piled up by her bed, most of it she couldn't eat anyway (oesophageal cancer). No one helped her. We had to battle to get her discharged to a suitable care home, where she died two weeks later.
I dread the thought of any other relative (or me) being in the same position. No dignity whatsoever.

Thanks for all the replies - I’m so sorry to read if all the similar stories.

Well after witnessing both ladies either side of me sat crying and with no water I got up and walked to the nurses station and asked to speak to Martron.

I said I wanted to make a complaint. She took me into her/an office and I explained what I’d seen this morning - she started to say they were short staffed/under pressure until I mentioned I’d got sound recordings (not video) as I’d been so disgusted. And the fact that as a spinal patient I was having to get up and help these ladies on her ward was a bit of a poor show really wasn’t it?

she was all of a sudden very interested and concerned in my complaint. Lodged it as official with her.

Then the consultant came to see me and I had to go for an MRI but when I came back there was a hive of activity on our ward & lots of senior looking people - could be doctors I’m not sure but it seemed there was a ‘buzz’ about the place.

Anyway my 2 neighbors both thanked me and said after you went the nurses started smiling and bought us water. They asked what I’d said. I just said I told them we weren’t happy.

The lovely lady next to me has just buzzed for the loo and a nurse and a HCA came too help within seconds. And matron is keeping an eye as I’m typing. There’s even a HCA sat on our ward now at a desk.

I’m still going to write a letter after I’ve been discharged but hopefully me saying something has done something.

Celebratory cups of tea all round now!

They had that poem in my Nan's care home. Makes me cry.

Well done happilyeverafta - so impressed.

Bloody well done, happilyeverafta.

Well done, Happily. See the matron was about to dismiss you until you told her you had the evidence. She soon moved, didn't she. I can't stand all that. Oh they're under pressure shit. That's not the patients problem. They've got enough of their own shit going on. Plus we're all under pressure. And the biggest kicker is, no one asks them to do the job.
Heat and kitchen and all that.

Complain to the staff nurse and tell them you’re taking it further.

Complain through the hospital channels. This is not acceptable behaviour. Can you record next time someone is in with this lady?

Yeah, she soon shifted her attitude when I mentioned the recording. I’m going to keep it Incase it is a temporary fix here on the ward.

I’ve just given everyone a packet of frazzles to eat - it’s like a party here! Ha ha.

Fingers crossed though that the night staff get a decent handover and are better than last nights team

Good for you OP! Am proud of you and I don't even know you! I want to give you a round of applause!

Hope everything with your spine is OK and don't have to stay in too long.

A PP said it is callous treatment and they are right. My DM was in hospital last year for two weeks and two nurses were speaking in their own language over her whilst carrying out a procedure. She asked them what they were doing and they completely ignored her. The best nurses were two young girls in training. The rest couldn't give a toss!

Lets stop the degree for everything and get nursing seen as a good career.

Good for you OP. This is not normal on a ward - I used to work on elderly rehab wards and it could not have been more different to what you describe - and sadly the attitude displayed by staff always comes from the top, i.e. the matron trying to minimise. The senior staff where I worked were incredibly strict re patient care - we had a new HCA make a slightly tutting comment to a patient and I have never seen someone move as fast as the sister who overheard her and pulled her into the office. She was told to completely overhaul her attitude or start looking for a new job.

This makes me so sad! I'm due to qualify as a nurse in a few months, like you op, I love the nanna type patients! I always try to treat my patients as I would my own family. So sad that this isn't happening, I'm glad they've got you looking after them!

Fingers crossed for a good night! I'm certain that the staff will have had thorough handover.

Get well soon

My mother was in hospital for 10days a few years ago. I made sure I was with all day every day. Mostly the nurses were fine but they were understaffed. I did a lot of the daily care for my mum, (feeding, getting water, taking her to the loo etc), but there were elderly patients who didn't have that help and it was hard.

At one point my mother was desperate for the loo but needed a wheelchair. I asked several nurses and was always told to wait. In the end I went and found a porter and begged for a chair.

Later the nurse came and shouted at me for "hounding" her when she was busy with more important thing. She said "If your mother wets herself that's just tough - I have other patients to deal with and it would be a real pity if I messed up another patient's test results because of you". I was so embarrassed.

I can see how much pressure the nurses are under but it is truly dreadful.

Its awful when you have to produce evidence rather than 'he said/she said. They know what is happening. I also am fed up of them saying we are short staffed - its the way of the world now, its not just nursing.

I think for me its their attitude. Most looked like they would rather be doing anything but this role. Well - as luck would have it there are other jobs around. Most as stressful as nursing

You can call the Patients' Association and advise them.

It is not about shortages of staff - it is about an attitude of mind. You can be busy, but polite and caring.

Good for you OP - all power to your elbow!

A couple of posts have said this is what happens when you make nursing degeee only.

Most other countries have degrees for nurses, all other healthcare professionals such as radiographers, physios, occupational therapists, speech therapists, dietitians etc have been degeee educated for many years - and nobody ever says their degrees or Masters make them uncaring!

Many of the uncaring nurses will be ones who trained 30 years ago under the hospital school of nursing pathways. Plus, poor nursing care care and abuse was prevalent in the old mental health hospitals and learning disibility colonies and none of those registered nurses would have had a degree either as it was pre university education for nurses.

It’s shocking the amount of people with bad experiences

The nurses before now didn’t speak, come check obs or anything really - I dunno whether I’m ‘expecting’ too much but in the other ward I was on it was regular stuff and they would introduce themselves to us st each shift change.

Thanks for the well wishes, I’ve got damage after my epidural. Awaiting meeting with spinal surgeon so will see but hopefully they can do something for the pain

Unfortunately this is what happens when you turn nursing and care work froma vocation to a career pathway with a degree course which eliminates many good care assistants from becoming nurses.

Absolute nonsense

Modern nursing requires university education [and ongoing professional training and CPD] and yes not every health care assistant wants to take that path or is capable of it.

Poor care has absolutely nothing to do with nurses having a university education.

My father was treated really badly as he lay dying in a hospital ward by the callous staff until my brother complained vocally. He couldn't feed himself and food was laid out for him and then taken away untouched for days before we realised what was going on.

When my elderly mother was hospitalised I vowed to keep more of an eye on her. A nurse yelled at me when I asked could I have one of those cardboard bowls so that I could brush my mum's teeth. The nurse was vile to me - I shan't forget that.

Don't get old.

Oh, and good for you, OP xx

HCAs though can be pretty untrained. Each health authority deals with their training differently. And it is HCAs giving the care now that used to be called nursing.

I don't think it's anything to do with whether nurses have degrees or not. Unfortunately I suspect it's more to do with power imbalances, and what happens when certain personality types end up in a position of power over others, at least the bullying-type incidents like mocking or shouting at vulnerable patients, deliberately moving water out of reach etc.

I can understand some less-than-ideal situations arise from nurses being overworked and having to prioritise competing demands (e.g. one patient being left waiting for help with toileting because the nurse has to deal with an emergency involving another patient), but then there are the ones where someone seems to have gone out of their way to be deliberately cruel; those people have no business being in a caring role.

Good work op.

Hope you feel better soon.

Enjoy the frazzles!

The HCAs were doing all the leg work up till now.

All the obs, washing, bed making etc.

Nurses administer medication.

I think there are wonderful nurses out there, I think we have had a bad run on this ward with the 2 nurses on today.

Fingers crossed anyway.

Got our tea first though