To be disgusted about the treatment of elderly in hospital?

[happilyeverafta]

I’m currently in hospital and on a orthopedic ward where I’m the only patient under 70 (I believe, I’m 35)

The 5 elderly ladies here have varying degrees of ‘illness’ and as far as I can tell none are suffering from dementia just poorly ladies, bless them.

I arrived here last night and the welcome I received was as if David Beckham (insert other celeb crush if required) had walked into the ward swinging his todger around - they were all saying how great it was to have a ‘youngster’ for once. They also added I wasn’t likely to moan or ask for stuff....

The lady in the bed next to me has horrific facial injuries and covered in bruises. She’s 82. She started chatting to me and we had a lovely conversation (I will admit now I’m a sucker for a Nan type figure!). She’s clearly very sore and scared, nurses told me she’d been beaten up in her own home and thrown down the stairs and “to watch out as she screams out in the night due to be scared/nightmares” all days whilst rolling their eyes at me.

Last night she asked for some water and the nurse shouted at her that “you have half a cup we are busy so stop mythering” she explained Ste was very thirsty. In the end I gave her my hug as she was getting distressed.

This morning she was asleep as the nurses arrived on shift - they came in and shook her & shouted to wake her which frightened her she started crying, I then witnessed them rolling their eyes st her talking about her to each other in front of her abs laughing at her, the whole time she is looking at me saying “I think they think I can’t hear or understand them”

They then got her dressed and she was in pain and asking them to be a bit gentler they came from behind the curtain stating she’d made “another Oscar winning performance” and huffing and puffing. Insinuating she’s making it all up.

They then chat to each other in the middle of the ward about how she’s getting worse, clearly has woke up in a mood etc etc.

Aibu or is this how bad the NHS is now with the treatment of patients?! I’m sat here upset and shocked - I’ve not had any obs done or had anyone come to check on me. To be fair I’m ‘OK’ compared to these ladies but they seem so stretched for staff (1 nurse abs about 3 HCA) that the basic level of care and compassion has gone? Or is this how it is on an orthopedic ward?

My DM has given up complaining because nothing is done.

She is also scared of retribution.

I've seen this too. They tend to go for the people with no family or visitors and then pretend to be saintly in front of the patients who have family sat round.

It's nothing to do with cuts or being busy. Everyone knows it goes on but looks the other way.

tomato, we noticed this too. Because we ignored the official visiting hours, because we were so worried about the lack of care for Dad, we noticed how everything was spruced up before the wards officially opened to visitors.

Horrible.

Do you have a phone with you? I wonder how they would react if you started to video them 'in the act'?

Agree that it is those without assertive visitors who are most at risk.

Actually good idea to video them discreetly and put it on internet.

I am a nurse and feel disgusted reading this. All patients deserve dignity and respect and they are giving this lady neither. It is in fact abuse.

Please ask to speak to the ward manager or Matron and report what has happened, totally unacceptable.

Reporting rarely changes anything, which is why local newspaper or video on internet is a better bet.

My mum also says that the same ward can be totally different with a shift change with different staff and crucially a different person in charge. It is things like this that make me really frightened of getting old.

You can't NOT report!

Just to add about the videoing I personally would say avoid that, in a hospital you are compromising the confidentiality and privacy of other patients on the ward and could end up in trouble yourself, especially if you upload it to the internet!

This terrible treatment needs to be addressed but unless you have permission from the other patients to film please consider how that also could contribute to the compromise of their rights and dignity.

I was in a+e recently and some poor care was being filmed on a mobile with threats to upload it to Facebook.I personally felt very unhappy that I could be caught on that film in such a vulnerable state and another lady got very upset and aggitated about being filmed. Poor care needs to be challenged but also care taken not to cause more harm or upset in the process x

I think if you have ever spent any time in a hospital you will know that not all nurses are “Angels”. If you complain very little changes. There is very little compassion for the elderly especially if they do not have a loving family to visit them. Bring back the Matron or someone else with enough experience not to have the wool pulled over their eyes.

That poem was actually written by a nurse.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crabbit_Old_Woman

YANBU OP

Care of the elderly in NHS is pretty bad. :(

It isn't even about the NHS, it is about ageism. Too many people have negative attitudes towards older people.

BTW the poem is called Crabbit Old Woman written by Phyllis Mccormick, a nurse in nursing home in the 1960s.

Demand to see the safeguarding nurse liaison. Make a formal complaint.

TBH your OP - sweepingly accusing all nurses and the NHS and an homogenous entity of malpractice just isnt very helpful is it?

Fortunately I've only ever seen excellent care when I've been in hospital, but it does tend to be the specialist wards.

Like you OP I am usually the youngest there and have helped where I can - ringing the bell the someone or cutting up food, filling water cups etc

They are so under staffed and don't have time to offer emotional care and support which I think many patients need.

However, I've also seen some demanding patients too.

I think you need to make a judgement call on how you see it.

Thats not normal, or at least not my experience. When i was in an orthopaedic ward one of the HCAs went to the shop and bought an elderly woman a big bag of chocolates from his own money as she wasn't eating and said all she fancied was some chocolate. All the staff were unfailingly patient. Absolutely report.

This is horrendous.

Are you also able to film or record their abuse and show it to the CEO?

Please do something about this and I hope you get better soon.

Matron is still on the wards, she's now a Band 8, she never went away. .

Dunk I think disregard for the dignity of elderly people, is pretty widespread.

Ouch Orthopedic wards are very different from geriatric wards. Very different.

I had the opposite recently. Was in a very busy lrish hospital so understaffed. But l was constantly amazed at the nurses treatment of the old people. So gentle and chatty annd generally just lovely. So it is possible to be kind in the midst of high stress.
I said to a nurse ..how can you be so patient in the middle of this mayhem.and she said its not the patients fault we are understaffed.