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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Husband's painting

106 replies

restofthetimes · 26/10/2017 12:30

DH has been saying we can't afford to re-do our front garden for 9 years now. It has been tricky to get quotes in from reliable people, and its a massive space - about 1/2 acre. Its quite a wilderness and I want to basically pull it all up and grass it, and also re-cover the drive, which is quite long.
Well, he has quite a lot of assets eg wine, and today I found out that a small nude oil painting we have in our bedroom is by a rather famous artist (Bernard Dunstan) and worth around £10k.
This would probably pay for the front garden.
AIBU to get him to sell it? He's saying no way, as he is in love with the painting and he looks at it every day. I like it, but thinking about that money........ we could easily put up with a print or unknown artist instead.

OP posts:

KarateKitten · 26/10/2017 13:04

Wine can be an asset. We've quite a few cases of Bordeaux sitting in a merchants that is definitely an asset. It was a very good investment in fact.

Uptheduffy · 26/10/2017 13:04

he is in love with the painting and he looks at it every day
Tell him you'll let him look at you in the nude everyday if he sells it, a fair swap.
Ask him which he wants to sell, wine or painting. I can't imagine chosing to have a large house with a well stocked wine cellar and original art work, but living with a wilderness for a front garden.

MeT00 · 26/10/2017 13:06

Wine can be a very good asset (although not in our situation as we drink them all)

KarateKitten · 26/10/2017 13:07

In relation to the painting then it is simply a question of priorities and pleasure. That's an individual thing. I personally would get greater pleasure out of a beautiful and under control garden than a painting. Though would weigh up the possibility that the painting may well appreciate.

We have to live for now though, so it's a balance.

thecatsthecats · 26/10/2017 13:08

I wouldn't even sell my fiances cheapy cheap bass guitar that he never plays , let alone something he really liked, for something I wanted. but I am relegating it to the loft and seeing if he notices

Original poster

restofthetimes · 26/10/2017 13:08

Yes, all wine investments and art bought before we met.
I've had a go at the garden, but we don't know what we're doing. We have a gardener 2 hours per week, but he just keeps it from becoming day of the trifids.
Also, the garden could be an investment as it could up the value of the house - according to Sarah Beeney etc....

OP posts:

sirfredfredgeorge · 26/10/2017 13:10

I'm wondering how you suddenly discover a painting in your bedroom is by a famous artist and worth money, about the only scenario that made sense was that you've started shagging Lovejoy and after an afternoon in your bedroom he noticed...

Anyway, as above, YABU to sell something someone loves simply to spend it on a garden for you to be less annoyed with (spending that on the garden would be very unlikely to make it back in increased house value, particularly if you're not going to sell immediately as it will require continued maintenance)

MrsBirdseye · 26/10/2017 13:11

YABU. Gardeners don't cost a cow.
Or try doing it yourself.

KarateKitten · 26/10/2017 13:12

Some real martyrs on this thread. Or maybe just a lot of garden hating Art connoisseurs.....

Or maybe people are a little bit wanting to slap down this OP with the potentially lovely garden, valuable art and wine investments...

Bellabelinda · 26/10/2017 13:13

Sell some of the wine and save to sort out the drive and work on the garden yourself. Yes it sounds like it would be hard work but if you want it done that badly the two of you could do it next spring/summer. I agree the painting will be worth more in 20 years so worth holding onto.

krustykittens · 26/10/2017 13:14

We collect art. Every piece we bought, we bought because we LOVED it. I wouldn't part with a single painting unless it was a serious emergency (kids or OH needing private medical treatment, house about to be re-possessed, etc). Asking me to part with a single painting to do up a garden that you CAN do yourself, would be seriously provoking. Watch some youtube videos, plan how to keep it maintenance simple and get stuck in!

RhiWrites · 26/10/2017 13:17

Well if it were me I'd scan the painting, put the print up and sell the original. (Not secretly, I don't mean that.)

How would a print be functionally any different?

teaandtoast · 26/10/2017 13:17

Buy a goat.

KarateKitten · 26/10/2017 13:18

Krusty is it so incrediblely difficult to believe that some people might like gardens more than art? Her DP has every right to like his art more than the garden but she's not unreasonable for exploring the possibility of bettering their property by selling an asset.

LondonHuffyPuffy · 26/10/2017 13:18

YABU. Bernard Dunstan's work is beautiful, is highly likely to increase in value (as he died this year and the time was the oldest Royal Academician) and is therefore a great asset as well as a thing of beauty.

Anyway, how do you know it's worth £10k? Have you had it valued?

Sell the wine.

Original poster

restofthetimes · 26/10/2017 13:18

It needs diggers and skips and lots of work I just don't have a the strength for. A million rhodedendrons to come out, bamboo, holly trees..... And we do need to widen the driveway, so I honestly can't do it myself.
I could save up, but sahm, its going to take me years!

OP posts:

sharklovers · 26/10/2017 13:20

YABU. Gardeners don't cost a cow.
Or try doing it yourself.

How much do you think a drive costs? OP’s could easily cost £10k+. The gardening is the cheap part.

Wanderlust1984 · 26/10/2017 13:20

I wouldn't make him sell a painting he loves.

But massive lol at all the folk saying wine isn't an asset 😂😂😂 I hardly doubt it's bottles of Tesco chardonnay!!

WhooooAmI24601 · 26/10/2017 13:20

Don't sell the art. Sell your DH. You don't sound overly keen on him and then you'd have nobody to argue with (or share your wine with).

Santawontbelong · 26/10/2017 13:21

Op you need some chickens. .
Believe me in 6 months you will have nothing growing in the garden. .
Then fence off VERY WELL the parts they are allowed in. And you get on with doing the rest how you want it!!

TinklyLittleLaugh · 26/10/2017 13:21

I would prefer to have a lovely garden than a lovely painting.

MyOtherNameIsAFordFiesta · 26/10/2017 13:22

@Whatthefoxgoingon errrr wine can absolutely be bought as an investment provided you don’t drink it.

I love the idea of someone buying a load of wine, drinking it, and then sitting around pissed wondering where their profits are!

LondonHuffyPuffy · 26/10/2017 13:22

Well if it were me I'd scan the painting, put the print up and sell the original. (Not secretly, I don't mean that.) How would a print be functionally any different?

Because a print, no matter how meticulously well done will never be as good or beautiful as the original painting (and you certainly wouldn't get a good image from a scan... and might even damage the painting whilst scanning it).

Plus it would be in breach of the artist's copyright, which now belongs to his estate. No potential purchaser is going to want you to retain a scanned copy of the work.

NinonDeLenclos · 26/10/2017 13:22

Nope I'd never sell a painting I loved.

Original poster

restofthetimes · 26/10/2017 13:22

Chicken aren't going to eat through trees and rhodedendrons, however you spell it.
I love him! Quite like the idea of offering him to see me nude every day - but I will age unlike the beauty in the painting!

OP posts:

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