AIBU - 'I'm having a fab time' photos.

[Tazmum01]

People that are desperate for you to think that they have such a great life. If they're out, we all know about it. Tagged in lots of fab places, selfies with lots of fun looking people, pictures of their cocktails with a beautiful sunset behind it.
We went out drinking this weekend with a bunch of couples and whilst it was nice to be out (child free) it wasn't the best day ever (early bar). We had some laughs, but when I looked at the pics that I was inundated with, I thought 'was I at the same place as these people?'
Am I getting old? Am I a complete mardy arse for thinking this way? Or was I so smashed that I didn't realise that I was having so much fun?
I hope I'm not past it???!!! Tell me I'm not alone.

I think this is the problem with social media. It’s only what you present to the world. Most people only show the positive stuff, so even if an afternoon drinking was mediocre, you present it as fantastic. Equally I had an old friend who did nothing but moan! I had to stop following her as the negativity dragged me down.

I’ve been off sick from work so I haven’t posted to Facebook at all for 2 months. Only one person noticed and has contacted me to ask if I’m okay. I feel that’s quite telling. I’d leave entirely but there’s a couple of groups I’m in that are helpful and supportive, I only stay for them.

I'm in a bookgroup with some lovely mums - really nice and intelligent, but, when we're out in a social situation that's all they do. Take photos, pore over them to see if they all look good, no, take another one, repeat endlessly, then fill up my fb feed with them. I don't go out with them much anymore, it's really boring.

I rarely post on fb about events, I like seeing a couple of photos of my friends out and about, but I don't need 96 duck pouts and gurning of one evening out. I had people round for dinner on Saturday and NOBODY took a photo. It still existed and we still had a fantastic time. (Although I was tempted to take a boasty photo of the lovely champers we were drinking, MN, you will be glad to hear that I refrained from doing so ;-) )

I was thinking about this yesterday. Yesterday my siblings and I went out with our parents for a significant anniversary celebration.
I meant to take photos - the grandchildren joined us - I meant to get some lovely photos - my mum even asked me if I was going to post on FB - I did take one during the meal but that was it in the end .
I had such a good day I just didnt get round to it. I have no FB memories but I am glad in a way, it was just lovely.
I know some people who live their life through FB photos but the reality is quite different - meh - whatever gets you through.

Now duck face trout pout pics - JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZ - I do not understand them at all - I am 38 and seeing people my age doing it makes me cringe so much. My sister is one of the prettiest people I know and I saw one of her recently - no need for it at all!!

I have a friend who is 63, every pic she posts are so filtered she looks 23. I don't how how she can accept all the compliments on how young she looks without making some kind of joke about filters, airbrushing etc. The people commenting know she looks nothing like that in real life but still the gushing "you look gorgeous" comments flow.

A group of friends and I recently had a holiday in a villa worth millions. There isn't a single photo of our time there on any social media. Just don't feel the need. I assume that is the root of it. Whether or not you feel the need to prove anything to anyone.

my sister is like this - however i know it just all for show and her real day-to-day life is far from what she portrays online - if you didnt know her though, you would think all she does is buy expenvise shoes/bags/makeup and go on holidays to beautiful islands and sip on cocktails watching the sun go down .

My insta is howlever full of cake pictures (i am a hobby baker) and funny kids pictures - pretty much how i live my life. Baking and laughing at my children (and husband). Oh, and on FB i have an unhealthy obsession with TWD

It still existed and we still had a fantastic time yy to this.

@Narnia72 tell more about the lovely champers I'm after a good recommendation

I do agree that some people post for the likes etc but I don’t think that everyone is necessarily taking photos for other people or to show off.

I quite often ‘check in’ or put photos on Facebook but I do it because I love looking at my memories on Facebook and remembering all of the things I’ve done or the lovely moments I’ve had with people.

Sometimes when life is getting you down, it’s good to recognise or remember the little moments that make or made you happy. It’s not always for show for everyone else, in my opinion

I agree OP. I'm not on any social media because I just can't be bothered with this sort of thing, it feels like a competition. I've been accused of 'never going out' because I don't post photos of anything I just don't feel the need to share moments of my life with, let's face it, probably just a bunch of people I went to school with 15 years ago who I don't even care about.
I've been out & about with people who are completely glued to their phones, so preoccupied with taking perfect photos of everything & then putting them on social media - they can't possibly have had the amazing time they are desperate to portray as they barely interacted with anyone! I think that's sad.

I’m not on Facebook, but I am a regular poster on Instagram. I struggle mental health-wise and made a commitment to myself about a year ago that I would document a “nice thing” every day to remind me things aren’t all bad. Sometimes that might be my dinner or my outfit, other times it might be something I see when I’m out, or my cat. Everything is, to some extent, “curated” online.

I've been bewildered by this too - I had a nice enough, pretty quiet few drinks with a couple of friends recently and the next day saw on FB "Amazing night out with Hassled and Sue - have never laughed so much" with a photo of a G&T. It's just baffling. What did I miss?

I hate it too.

So many people I know will tag them self at a restaurant and their OH will take a picture of them holding up their drink with their food infront of them - and then they do the same thing for the OH.
I always wonder how strange that must look to other people!
When my food arrives, I’m eagerly cutting it up so it can cool down quickly! No time for pictures!

If I go out with my friends then we take pictures. But we don’t upload them until we’re at home or the next day.
I don’t actually post much on Facebook though, I prefer instagram as I take a lot of pictures of my children.

I use fb & insta to help journal the good & nice things in my life. There are plenty, plenty of downs, shit times and messes that I deal with in life, like most adults. I choose to deal with them away from social media. I suspect lots of others use it to diarise too. Its an instant way to capture memories with some context- ie who you were with, why you were out / away etc and I love to look back and relive parts.

I personally don’t get all of the negativity- yes some people use it for attention seeking, exploiting others, etc etc, but you can unfollow or block... social media also helps raise awareness of local and broader issues, connects family & friends when they live in separate parts of the world etc and does not have to be viewed as a representation of a ‘perfect life’.

I didn't used to put much on Fbook but I've realised its a lovely way of preserving memories and having a little smile a year or 2 down the line eg today I have 23/10/16 I was drinking sickly shakes with my daughters. Just nice memories. For me not anyone else. My FB friends are not numerousd anyway

Maybe this is just the mood of the moment, but I am totally with you OP. Everyone's lives are so damn fabulous and I feel a bit blah. But we all know the reality. Day to day life is a gift, albeit a mundane one, we hope. It's not all bells and whistles, even if FB and instagram insist that it must be so! I see my brother struggling through chemo, radiation, and surgery which STILL gives him only a 20 % 5 year survival rate. That's BIG shit. That's the shit you don't really see on FB. I find myself unusually wound up by the Look At Fabulous Us pics. I'm normally the last person to give a damn but right now, I seem to get really wound up by it all. I unfollow a lot of people lately.

That being said, I really like seeing family and pet pics! I love a good dog photo, every time.

I was out one night at a restaurant and there was a hen party at the next table. None of them spoke to each other. They took selfies, photographed their food (didn't touch it), asked the guy who was cooking for them to repeat everything so they could photograph it (he got annoyed) and sat in almost silence all night. I can only imagine the messages they were putting on FB about the fab time they were having.

i'm with trills :)

its fun its social - i don't have any agenda

I think most of the posts I see on FB of people having 'fun' are really people who are disappointed and trying to make a bad situation look good. I do have one person on my Fb who posts real photos of her kids screaming in a restaurant (how things really are). If your having such a good time why would you pause to take photos and put them on social media?

I am quite lonely, day to day, so when people post pictures of their fun lives (whether that's actually representative or not) I feel closer to them and can sort of enjoy it vicariously.

I don't think I've ever experienced an event where the posting to social media came ahead of enjoying it in the moment, though. Perhaps I'd be more jaded about it if that had been the case.

My in-laws do this! Every day out is the best day ever; every Christmas is "the best family Christmas, love them so much #lovemyfam #bestfriends".

And I'm sitting thinking "I was there. You all sat on your phones and occasionally argued about who's turn it was to do dishes".

I always assume people are bored if they're on social media when out with friends. I wouldn't even have my phone on the table and none of my friends do either. Might be a generation thing though.

YANBU OP, it’s a presentation of a life they most likely don’t really live. It’s basically saying “I’m having a much better time than the next person”. It only serves to fuel jealousy and resentment, not much good comes from it. I prefer honest people and honest portrayals. But I’m afraid it’s a sign of the times! I worry for my kids, social media is very influential and I hope people don’t take it as gospel that this is what life really looks like.

You should join me and my friends when we go out OP. We can barely use the functions on our mobile phones and when the food comes out it's snouts in trough time.