Lyrics that piss me of

[Fishface77]

I've just heard a song and one of the lyrics goes along the lines of

"....and we make love right there on your best friends couch...."

This has pissed me right of!

1. Why on your best friends couch?
2. Stains? Do you think they put a towel down first?
3. Smell? We can all smell sex!
4. What if he walks in on you?

"You're so vain...you probably think this song is about you...."

BUT IT IS!!

cuntpuffin

My momma don't like you and she likes everyone

Bet this is one of those mummy's boys written about on mumsnet thats still breastfed at 28. Your mommas a narcissist.

Cuntpuffin! Genius.

"Flexing vocabulary runs right through me, the alphabet runs right from A to Z". Or anything by All Saints, come to think of it.

"Every move you make, every breath you take, I'll be watching you". Er, that's stalking, mate.
"Baby can't you see, you belong to me". No, I really don't.

“Do you ever feel like a plastic bag..”

Er.....no.never.

Anyone heard that song "I'm not just a pretty girl" on heavy rotation on capital fm? Sooo irritating..says something like "I drink and I smoke I keep up with the guys" grrr sounds like she's trying to be such a cool girl!

Black eyes peas -

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Friday, Saturday, Saturday to Sunday.

You can't add an extra Saturday to the week just to make the lyrics fit!

My inner grammar pedant hates the song Hungry Eyes.

"I feel the magic between you and I"

IT SHOULD BE YOU AND ME DAMN IT.

And breathe...

Working My Way Back To You by The Spinners.

"Oh, I used to love to make you cry
It made me feel like a man inside"

grrrr. You twat.

I also hate More Than Words by Extreme. Which basically says fuck me now or the relationship is over. Grrr again!

Thought of more with the help of DD.

Van Halen-
Only time will tell if we stand the test of time.

Erm well duh!

Dr Dre-
I kick plenty of ass so call me an astronaut.

Akon -
I'm trying to find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful. And then damn you're a sexy bitch.

Oh yeah not disrespectful AT ALL!

Eminem-

Now you gotta watch her leave out the window, guess that's why they call it window pane.

The killers -
I've got soul but I'm not a soilder

Clearly only soilders normally have souls!

Hillary Duff -
If the light is off then it isn't on.

Well thank you for pointing that out!

Bruce Springsteen - "hey little girl is your daddy home"

It just makes my skin crawl.

Honestly why I’m glad I never have the radio on in-the car. Switch to podcasts, much more civilized!

Who the fuck is Sally any way?

Tbh precious few oasis songs make any sense whatsoever.

Yes but sober then how else could we take the piss out of them??

Try this: The Crystals: He hit me, and it felt like a kiss.
I'm in my twilight years, started deconstructing lyrics many years ago - it's not easy to stop!

That rubbish about 'I'm in love with a sheepdog'.

Has anyone done 'you're my favourite waste of time'? Those lyrics have always annoyed me intensely, well don't hang out with me mate if i'm wasting your time!

Walk like an Egyptian

'Whatever I said, whatever I did I didn't mean it...'

Oh that's ok then

Police - I'll be watching you. I remain convinced that it's a song about stalking.

This is going back a few decades years and most of you won't remember but there's a great reggae song by a woman called Susan Cadogan called "Hurts So Good" which goes:

"cos Baby, I don't want you to ever quit
It ain't no good, 'til it hurts a little bit."

Great song but that lyric ruins it every time. It's a recurring trope as well, this idea that love has to hurt or it isn't real love.

Freudian YES a million times. I've always hated that song. The schmaltzy fake Irish music bit is just insult to injury.

I’m a happy person but I never felt I had to....
“Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof”

'Got me spread like a buffet' - Katy Perry Bon Appetit

< not envy