To 'guide' teacher towards better internet safety?

[musicmaiden]

DS8 has a newly qualified teacher for his form this year. We have not met her properly yet – the parents' evening is this week. DS has been having ICT lessons, including a focus on internet safety, this half term. He came back from school recently and asked DH why he needed so many passwords for the internet, as 'X said she is a bit rubbish with passwords so has the same one for everything which is easier'.

Now, of course, this was a throwaway comment, probably meant to be a bit jokey and self-effacing, but clearly DS had picked up on it. DH works in the tech industry and is shit-hot at this stuff so wasn't too impressed. He is now planning to take a sheet of info on password protection into the parents' evening to give to her and explain why she needs to vary her passwords and why it's not great to say what she did.

DH is very lovely and kind, and won't be trying to make her feel bad or anything, but AIBU to be nervous that she'll probably still be embarrassed and it'll chalk us up as 'those parents'? Or am I being a wuss and it's actually just constructive feedback?

He'll look a twat.

Yeah he'll definitely be one of those parents sorry.

Oh God, please don't let your DH do this.

How sanctimonious and self righteous of him.

She won't be embarrassed. She will be bemused and think "who is this knob?!". You will definitely be those parents.

That seems really patronising

Why doesn't he volunteer to go into class and give a talk on internet safety instead?

Oh god don't do that

He's going to mansplain it all to her.

She knows. She most likely just said something like that as a throw away comment. Please don't send a man in to tell her how to run her life.

How does your son know how many passwords your Dh has? Is that a normal topic of discussion for 8 year olds?

No way should he take a sheet in but he could mention it if he feels so strongly

I think he could word it differently that he does not agree with the message that is being given to his child as through his work he knows only too well the dangers of internet fraud.

Giving a 'cheat sheet' is very OTT though.

Really unreasonable. Do you actually think she's change her behaviour because your oh-so-wise husband says so?

He's absolutely right, but yes that approach would be a bit patronising and likely not result in the desired change. If her internet skills really are that poor and she's getting away with it at work, take it up properly with the school - she won't be the only one.

Btw I see no reason to assume that she isn't simply telling the truth about using the same password for everything - loads of people do.

He is now planning to take a sheet of info on password protection into the parents' evening to give to her and explain why she needs to vary her passwords and why it's not great to say what she did.

I don't always agree with concept of 'mansplaining', but this is a case if I ever saw one. If your husband does this, that's what he'll forever be known as - 'Mr Mansplainer' in the staff room. As long as he's ok with that, he should go right ahead.

I'm sure she knows that she should have different passwords for different sites. Most people do. Most people also cannot be arsed so just have the same password because it's easier.

He shouldn't try to tell her this because she already knows. Also, taking a sheet with it all written down, mansplaining style, would result in the sheet being passed around the classroom.

Passed around the staffroom

I'm sure she'll be eternally grateful that a man has come along to put her right

Please talk your DH out of doing this. What an incredibly smug, self-righteous, patronising, misogynistic thing to even consider doing.

He's going to mansplain it all to her.

She knows. She most likely just said something like that as a throw away comment. Please don't send a man in to tell her how to run her life.

I'm not 'sending him' anywhere. This is entirely his decision.

I thought I explained in my OP that I was uncomfortable with the idea myself which was why I was eliciting opinions.

FWIW I debated whether to put the teacher as 'her' at all because he would be doing exactly the same thing if it was a man. Exactly. But I get that he could come across as a mansplainer.

He's really going to rock up to parents evening with an information sheet and lecture the teacher on her use of passwords?!

Hilarious!

He really really shouldn't do this.

I font see how it is mansplaining ? Its not like hes going to explain german politics to angela merkel. The teacher is wrong

Password use is vitally important as im sure many mumsnet members should be very aware of...

Also a complete waste of parents evening time!

Whilst he's using up your first minutes explaining something she probably already knows you're going to then expect your full 10/15 minutes or whatever you're allotted talking about your son so then make her and all the other parents run late as well.

Either that or you'll be back afterwards telling us how you felt 'hurried' through your appointment time.

I say to people I have the same password. I do and I don't.
For ones which really don't matter if they're secure-ie I only use it to access information and don't leave any personal information, I do use the same password.
Then I have the next stage passwords which are a combination of something like famous five books and (so Five on a Treasure Island=FoaTI1, because it's the first book in the series)
Then my really secure ones which are based on something totally different which would mean something to me, but not to anyone else.

So perhaps if pushed I would say I have 3 passwords.

But actually the one that irritates me is when you get those messages on fb saying "Please teach my class about Internet Safety by showing how far this can travel. Please comment by saying where you are"
I always put on the comments "Middle of the Amazon Rainforests. I hope the next lesson will be teaching them not to believe anything people write on the internet."