To 'guide' teacher towards better internet safety?

[musicmaiden]

DS8 has a newly qualified teacher for his form this year. We have not met her properly yet – the parents' evening is this week. DS has been having ICT lessons, including a focus on internet safety, this half term. He came back from school recently and asked DH why he needed so many passwords for the internet, as 'X said she is a bit rubbish with passwords so has the same one for everything which is easier'.

Now, of course, this was a throwaway comment, probably meant to be a bit jokey and self-effacing, but clearly DS had picked up on it. DH works in the tech industry and is shit-hot at this stuff so wasn't too impressed. He is now planning to take a sheet of info on password protection into the parents' evening to give to her and explain why she needs to vary her passwords and why it's not great to say what she did.

DH is very lovely and kind, and won't be trying to make her feel bad or anything, but AIBU to be nervous that she'll probably still be embarrassed and it'll chalk us up as 'those parents'? Or am I being a wuss and it's actually just constructive feedback?

Where in the OP does it say that she tells the children something wrong Ursula/Puntastic?

She tells them she uses the same password. I can't find where she tells them to do the same.

I would honestly rather the teacher was correctly pointing out the limits of passwords and the need to think before you post on social media than giving DC a false sense of security with a ten minute lecture of setting strong passwords, changing them regularly and using multiple ones which you never keep a note of (completely unrealistic for the average adult let alone teenager).

DH is an IT professional. He has never yet felt the need to mansplain me or our 3 DDs or any teacher on password security. He does however practise appropriate parental supervision of our DC's internet activities.

None of us can be sure what the teacher actually said. She might have said something like "I have one password for everything as it's much easier. ... well actually I don't because ..." and DS actually tuned out in middle. Or "of course it's much easier to have 1 password for everything but ..."

Please, please beg him not to do this!

I'm surprised so many of you are OK with teachers getting their subjects wrong!

Subjects? Nope - we have no idea of the context or fully what was said, hence the responses.

As someone who actually teaches E-Safety to Year 7s, I can imagine a wide variety of ways this conversation went and therefore, am only concentrating on the main point of the OP, rather than second guessing something where neither I nor the OP was present.

Just no. She won't be embarassed - more likely gobsmacked at how rude he is being. It'll give the staff room something to laugh about though.

Instead of him tackling the teacher about what she may or may not have said, why not encourage him to give an internet safety talk to parents and teachers instead. At my school we had a parent offer to do this about 5 years ago and it was undoubtedly one of the most useful/scariest talks I’ve listened to in recent years. It has completely changed my password habits.

Oh, how lovely-Mr 'very important because he works in IT' Dad came in to educate me on internet safely today-I am so grateful.... she will think.

If your dh is so shit hot maybe he could volunteer to share his knowledge with the school and give internet safety talks

Maybe he could volunteer in IT lessons. He can tell them about high security passwords and then help reset 17 passwords each lesson.

DS is eight, has no online banking etc. School will encourage them to have one password they can remember and then over the years will add higher level security as is age appropriate.

At eight his online safety needs have other priorities.

To give some context in an e-safety lesson I asked this question

What would you say if I had the same password for every log in?

What a nob

For me, it was mainly this bit:

"He came back from school recently and asked DH why he needed so many passwords for the internet, as 'X said she is a bit rubbish with passwords so has the same one for everything which is easier'."

Obviously kids are likely to take some notice of the things their teachers say, even if she didn't mean it as formal instruction. And especially if it's different from what the OP's son has been taught at home - thus catching his attention and encouraging him to raise it with his dad, as he did.

Sure, maybe it was all part of a very sensible and intelligent discussion about usable security, people's natural tendency to work around impossible password policies, and what we can do to help ourselves any each other to be more secure in everyday life, without spending hours every day maintaining large suites of long complex passwords. It just didn't sound like it from the OP...

Teacher here. I would be absolutely gobsmacked if a parent did this. It's completely inappropriate.

I can't believe you had to ask whether this is a good idea! You must really have him up on a pedestal where he can do no wrong.

Please, OP, encourage your DH to go in with his sheet! I'm sure the teachers could do with a laugh during their break, and your DH mansplaining passwords is going to provide them with some rather juicy material.

What an utter knob-head. Knows it all does he? How gracious of him to share his superior knowledge with this newly qualified teacher.

Up to him how he parents and how he interacts at parents evening, not your job to manage him or police him. He is a grown up, I would stay out of it.

I'm not sure about the direct to teacher approach. I do think that offering his experience to the whole school in the form of either a workshop or an information sheet would be fantastic however. A lot of people realise that internet safety is really important and so would be very pleased to see the school taking it seriously and to learn something themselves. If you can get the school interested then they should share the information with all the teachers.

My DC's school ran parent workshops done by a parent with expertise and he went into KS2 ict classes as well.

God don't let him!!
Not unless you want him and you by association to be the joke in the staff room.

How sanctimonious and self righteous of him

Too right! Tell him to mind his own business

Up to him how he parents and how he interacts at parents evening, not your job to manage him or police him.

No, but if he does turn up with his super special spreadsheet of manly knowledge, it's not just himself he's there for. He'll not only embarrass himself, he'll embarrass his family through association. His son with always be 'Mr Mansplain's kid'. Parenting is a team game, that includes parent's evening and speaking to teachers about how your child is learning.

I would be gobsmacked if a teacher really did dismiss internet safety and password security as casually as it seems.

I would want to ask about the incident at parents'evening, hopefully to find that it was all a misunderstanding and the teacher really does understand how important internet safety is.

If it turned out that the teacher was setting a bad example then a formal letter would follow.

Compare with "I am a bit rubbish looking both ways crossing the road, so I just march straight across."

I'm surprised so many of you are OK with teachers getting their subjects wrong!

I'm afraid to say that in the six schools in which I have for any time taught, I've never come across an ICT teacher with a qualification in the subject....
But obviously your husband shouldn't do this, just like I didn't correct the spelling of 'practice' on my DS's year 1 spelling test sheet (it wasn't one of the words to learn!).