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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I know IABU but...

97 replies

FuckMyUterus · 14/10/2017 09:31

So... I'm in a group (totally unrelated to TTC) and there happens to be a lady in there who does fertility readings. She and I got chatting, I explained I am TTC and she pointed me over to her tarot page. She has pages and pages of reviews from people whose pregnancies she has correctly predicted, both conception months and due date months etc. She ran a competition for a free 10 card reading and I won. I have received my reading and am devastated. She has told me that I have some medical issues relating to fertility, and that the liklihood is that I will need medical intervention to conceive and that even then, I am unlikely to have a baby with my partner.
This has really, really upset me. Things she mentioned in the reading are so accurate in other aspects that it's ridiculous, so I am convinced that she's right about the whole lot.
I don't even know why I'm posting but I guess I just need a few virtual slaps and to be told to get a grip of myself Sad

OP posts:
bedtimestories · 14/10/2017 10:56

Reading between the lines from your first post, you could use Donner sperm, I've heard this is more successful when trying to conceive artificially. I believe in tarot cards but wouldn't take what she said with a pinch of salt. Good luck

Original poster
FuckMyUterus · 14/10/2017 11:06

My card were:
Current position: Moon
Second card was: 5 of pentacles
Third was: 5 of cups
Fourth was: 9 of cups
Fifth was: 7 of pentacles
6th: 7 of wands
7th: ace of swords
8th: 4 of pentacles
9th: knave of pentacles
10th: the hermit

OP posts:
Original poster
FuckMyUterus · 14/10/2017 11:08

bedtime thanks for sharing that, but honestly even IF we couldn't conceive naturally, a donor is not something we would consider, I have a son already by someone else and have had some medical issues since which I won't go into, but my partner wouldn't consider a donor.

OP posts:
AndrewJames · 14/10/2017 11:09

She's a con artist, plain and simple. She can no more tell you the future than I can.

Mulberry72 · 14/10/2017 11:11

Tarot is a crock of shit!

nakedscientist · 14/10/2017 11:11

Bedtime
Doner sperm is only helpful if there is an issues with OP DH's sperm count
We don't know what the issue is or if there IS even any issue with their fertility.
OP GP and see your GP, good luck and don't panic!

buckeejit · 14/10/2017 11:11

Ok, it's weird but I'd also be upset & take a logical response. Did she give any indication what the medical issue might be? If you're under 35 I think it is then a trip to docs is advised by now. If you can afford it you could choose to have tests done privately-no idea how much this costs.

Are you using the clear blue fertility monitor? I've found it pretty good in the past to understand my unusually cycle and pinpoint ovulation times.

Good luck

upperlimit · 14/10/2017 11:13

You say what now? Shock

This woman is preying on your fear to legitimise her bullshit. Don't give her this power.

Papafran · 14/10/2017 11:13

What a bitch for conning and taking advantage of a vulnerable person. Expel all the thoughts of what she said from your mind. If you do need medical intervention, it won't be because her stupid randomly selected cards predicted it. Also, the stress from her reading could affect you TTC so please try to forget about it.

Some arsehole psychic told my friend that her baby would be born with severe disabilities and she was distraught. Surprise, surprise, it was a load of bollocks. Flowers

ShowMePotatoSalad · 14/10/2017 11:14

I had a (once very rational) friend who would never have believed in psychic readings until she went to one. She was fully prepared to think it was a load of rubbish. When I next saw her she was all pie eyed and telling me how AMAZING this woman was. She knew everything about her. She had apparently mentioned her friends (including me) and gave information about us. My friend was so concerned of this lady's "powers" that she now fully believed in the afterlife, in psychic ability, etc.

I asked her how she found out about this woman. She said "through Facebook". I calmly suggested that perhaps this woman saw her on Facebook and found out about her through there. It would tie in with all the information she had about us, as well. My friend absolutely refused to believe this was a possibility, and accused me of suggesting this psychic might lie. She thought it outside of the realms of possibility that this woman could be dishonest.

Your tarot lady could have easily found out information about you, either through reading the look on your face, your body language, your age, the way you dress, anything. A woman in her twenties/thirties/forties, looks successful, looks put together...what could she be coming to me for? Ahh, a baby. It's that simple to work it out. BUT, you even say in your original post "she and I got chatting, and I explained I am TTC". You TOLD her. Now all she needed to do was tell you a load of crap about how you can't conceive. She has preyed on you in order to try to get repeat business. If you are worried you have more chance of going back to her to find out more. There are so many motives - a sense of self-importance, money, kudos. I can assure you this woman had a motive in upsetting you. Stay away from her in future and please do investigate your fertility through the proper route if you are worried. I'm sorry she has made you worry like this. Flowers

thegirlupnorth · 14/10/2017 11:15

Leave her a review based on what you've received and the block and move on, horrible woman.

Papafran · 14/10/2017 11:17

Oh and you are in a TTC group on facebook? I bet you any money she will have seen your posts where you have mentioned how long you have TTC or she will have worked it out from when you joined the group.

heateallthebuns · 14/10/2017 11:19

Well since she does this a lot, she'll have a fair idea how long people have been trying before they feel like going to her for advice. Not exactly rocket science.

C8H10N4O2 · 14/10/2017 11:20

You are not an idiot (well a little bit but you already know this Smile) but you are vulnerable and susceptible so squarely in the charlatan target area.

I used to do tarot readings. I started when I was at school - it was one of those games teenagers play and became a school fete/fund raisin g routine. I stopped doing it when I realised people were taking it seriously. Looking back I was good at it because I was good at what we now call cold reading - it certainly wasn't because I knew a damn thing about tarot cards, I was simply making stuff up and responding to cues.

The only time I ever do it now is to demonstrate how easy it is to be convincing even if you are a rank amateur who doesn't work at it.

sarahjconnor · 14/10/2017 11:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
FuckMyUterus · 14/10/2017 11:28

Thanks for all the replies, feeling much better about it now. Have gone online and booked myself a GP appointment for Tuesday, so hopefully will get some help there.

OP posts:
SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/10/2017 11:32

I used to do tarot readings. I started when I was at school - it was one of those games teenagers play and became a school fete/fund raisin g routine. I stopped doing it when I realised people were taking it seriously. Looking back I was good at it because I was good at what we now call cold reading - it certainly wasn't because I knew a damn thing about tarot cards, I was simply making stuff up and responding to cues.

This - what C8 says. Cold reading is an art (I'm pretty good at it ) but I would NEVER pretend to do it as anything more than a parlour trick. Derren Brown has written a lot about de-bunking it too.

mirime · 14/10/2017 11:40

Had a quick look at the cards you've listed, and I have no idea where she got that reading from. I'm horribly out of practice these days and don't use then for fortune telling anyway, but even from the point of view of 'predictions' based on card meanings I'm not getting it.

beluga425 · 14/10/2017 11:45

I wonder if everyone who contacts her wins this free 10-card reading.

Original poster
FuckMyUterus · 14/10/2017 11:47

cupofcake hmm there's an interesting thought. Possibly?

OP posts:
ShowMePotatoSalad · 14/10/2017 11:49

Anyone who seems slightly skeptical and unlikely to pay for a first reading will win this so-called "competition". The tarot lady will then give a reading based purely on what the person has already told them, along with using cold-reading techniques to flesh it out a bit. The traditional meanings of the cards drawn will be totally irrelevant - the tarot reader knows most people won't have a clue what the meanings are supposed to be anyway, so will disregard that and simply focus on the person's reasons for entering the tarot "competition" in the first place.

YouMeanNothing · 14/10/2017 11:51

You said it's her tarot page so presumably she has control of which reviews are visible on there. There will have been loads of bad ones for every good one just you can't see them, I wonder why

ShowMePotatoSalad · 14/10/2017 11:51

The tarot reading from Nighty Night:

Never fails to make me giggle

sarahjconnor · 14/10/2017 11:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ceto · 14/10/2017 11:58

You do know how easy it is to get fictitious reviews put on a website, don't you?

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