What is a fair amount of house work if you work from home ?

[36plusandtrying]

Keen to get an idea really - DH works from home, I work full time at least an hour commute each way traffic dependant. DH in bed/still asleep when I leave always bring him coffee. Even if he is awake he never offers to get up, make me a tea, pack my lunch - even if I'm rushing. I often stick a washing or dishwasher on before leaving. (Will let DH know if I have done and ask him to hang out) I've lost count on the amount of times I come home to rewash a stale washing, take one in from outside, unload dishwasher, put away dishes etc. He will help cook at night, because he enjoys this leaving me to tidy round/unload the dishwasher. I never come home to dinner on the table. I understand that he is working, but aibu to expect him to do a bit more ? Or do I just need to be appreciative of what little he does?

I work from home a lot, I don’t do any housework as I’m working. When I finish is when I do the washing up and the hoovering etc, but even that isn’t straightaway as I like to relax for a bit first.

Oh it's too subjective, so many variables. If I'm working at home I find it impossible to not clear up a bit, put a wash on etc.
DH not so much
The issue, as pp have said, is not so much whether it's reasonable to do housework when one is working from home, but whether you're bearing the majority of the load. (I'm assuming you're a woman btw)
Given the oft discussed issue of the sexual division of labour this is likely.
I have no advice. I failed in this matter in my own life.

The WFH is a red herring. Your DH just doesn’t want to tidy the kitchen or do laundry. Get a cleaner, stop bringing him his morning coffee and don’t cook for him

Working from home isn't the issue. I hate seeing threads all 'DP works from home but I'm pissed off thry haven't done all this housework'.

They WORK from home. So they are working & are entitled to have breaks to have a coffee/read the news/browse internet etc just like coffee breaks at work. They are not housekeepers.

Equally, why should he get up hours earlier because OP is uo early. I leave earlier than DH in a morning so I get up earlier. I wouldn't make him get up early brcause I have a longer commute.

The housework, all other things being roughly equal should be 50/50 regardless of who works from home.

I work from home and do pretty much zero housework during the working day because I am working. The hours I am not working DH is home too and he probably does a bit more housework than me as his standards and level of conscientiousness are higher than mine - but I do more diy, garden and car maintenance so it's probably about even.

You should both have equal leisure time so if you are spending your weekends on housework and he is too then that's fine but if he doesn't pull his weight then that's an issue.

The slight complication as a pp has said is that your love for your house means that clearly sometimes you are choosing to spend what could be leisure time on additional household tasks that are over and above basic maintenance of hygiene and tidiness. That does blur the boundaries as obviously while that's your choice, that extra stuff is not a burden that your DH should have to share. You need to be honest with yourself about what proportion of your housework time is normal and what is extra because of your unusual levels of houseproudness - the latter gets added to the reckoning of your leisure time when ensuring that these are equal.

Very interesting final points about maybe i go above and beyond what is a usual amount of tidying ! Might re visit the cleaner idea ....

Many people who claim they work from home and don'''t get a minute to themselves in their working day, manage to post on MN at various times and more than once a day too. Bet they're not doing all that in their lunch break

Why do people lie that they work from home, no boss no work colleagues there, and that they don't take more breaks than they would if they were visible, and in an office. I work from home, have done for years and I do take breaks of course.. No way am I doing 1 hour for lunch and thats it

All the crap about men working from home so can't do housework - when clearly the woman is working outside the home AND doing bigger share of the housework. Equal leisure time equal housework time and thats it.

Working from home doesn't make you any more special than someone working outside the home - who is normally up washed dressed and on way to commute whilst the self-employed work from homers are still lying in bed, sleeping through the commute time

I am as productive in the same way that I am when working outside the home. But I stagger my hours better at home and will do a shitload of work so I can faff about next day if I want. I do my housework on those days I don''t sit waiting for others in my household to come in and do it - why should everything get done in the evening and why would I wait on them? Its so entitled

Or are you meant to be of the mind that you clock off at 5 and if your other half doesn't get in till 7 you've grafted so hard you can't put a meal on, stick a wash in etc you have to prove a point? No thank you to that type

OP you may like everything nice and tidy but I bet your OH enjoys the spick and span home he's in

I can't stand sexism enablers Im sure most do it as they don't want a woman to feel good.

I can't stand sexism enablers Im sure most do it as they don't want a woman to feel good
Eh?
Most people havs pointed out the following (not sexist) points:

• Whoever works from home WORKS from home
• Just because they are at home doesn't mean they should use theit lunch break doing house duties
• Expecting someone who works from homr to do more house stuff is silly
• Allocation of house duties (all other things being equal) should be 50/50.

Nothing in that refers to men vs women.

It's when people start saying 'but if I was working at homr e then I would do x y z but when DH is at home he doesn't. Why should it always be women doing everything?' Some people at woto choose to go to the gym at lunch, others grab a coffee. It's preference.
If someone chooses to use their lunch break to do house stuff then fine, it's stuff taken off their 50%.

The real issue is allocation of house duties where 2 people working full time don't split 50/50. Working from hone doesn't come into that.

I am still of the opinion that if 2 people work full time, but one has a 2-hour commute on top, 50-50 is not fair. Commute is not exactly leisure and hobby.

I am still of the opinion that if 2 people work full time, but one has a 2-hour commute on top, 50-50 is not fair. Commute is not exactly leisure and hobby.

OH gets up earlier than I do as he has a long commute. I don't feel that I should get up at the same time (even though I'm woken by his alarm and generally don't get back to sleep before I need to get up) because it takes me longer to get to sleep on a night due to his snoring, and this also wakes me up a number of times through the night. So it's not always clear cut that commuting time should be used by the other person as 'work time'!

Hmm, I think he sounds rather a lazy oik.
I wfh 3 days a week. Today my hours are 9-6.
I've been up since 6am and DP left for work 15 mins ago and will get home at 10.30pm.
My house will be clean and tidy by 8.30am and a wash will be outside. I've taken a batch of chilli out of the freezer too.
I'll take a lunch hour 1.30 until 2.30 and will have a sandwich (made last night by DP who did all three lunches for today), a brew and watch Doctors. I'll also get the washing in and put away.
The way I look at it, rightly or wrongly, is that wfh can be viewed as a 'luxury' (not quite the right word I know) that many, many people would love. No commute etc. I use the time I'd commute to do other stuff.
My DP does less than me around the house (we're probably 65/35%) but does work very long shifts. Plus, I haven't washed up after dinner since about 2010. Literally as soon as dinner/tea/supper is finished then it's my downtime and he washes up, does lunches, litter tray, bins etc.

I am as productive in the same way that I am when working outside the home. But I stagger my hours better at home and will do a shitload of work so I can faff about next day if I want. I do my housework on those days I don''t sit waiting for others in my household to come in and do it - why should everything get done in the evening and why would I wait on them? Its so entitled

You might choose to stagger things because you are at home but that doesn't mean other homeworkers should do the same thing. Why shouldn't everything be done in the evening? What is "entitled" about choosing to do the tasks that need to be done when you want to do them? I prefer to do housework in the evening and at weekends. While I do unload the dishwasher and often do a load of washing, if DH told me he "expected" me to do that during my working day as if he was my boss I'd tell him where to go