to think I will never lose weight?

[frankie80]

I'm hoping someone can reassure me that losing 4 to 5 stone is still do-able when I am such a picky eater and super busy with a full time job, university course and child?

I eat too much junk and I'm a really bad cook. Seriously, I don't even know what most labels mean and leave it to DH who works two jobs so it's mostly take outs or ready meals for us.

I hate all fish except haddock. I don't like pasta or pizza. I hate most veggies unless in soup and even then it's only some soups. (I bought two soup makers and neither of them worked even with instructions and asking on help on here so I can't even make fucking soup. I feel pretty useless)

I don't like much fruit, except apples, satsumas, strawberries and grapes.

I hate salads - there's no taste and I don't like seasonings/dressings.

No seeds or nuts (except peanuts). No cheese, quorn.

DH hates fish, eggs, nuts and anything with a visible bone.

I love chocolate, chips, chinese food, fast food basically

I can't get to a gym time wise so I keep saying I'll try the likes of the 30 day shred but then work, study, and entertaining DD just takes over.

My uni used my old student photo for my 'new' card. They said I didn't need to send a new photo because they already had one and I stupidly agreed only to get a card through with a young, skinny, pretty me. What will shops etc think when I'm requesting a discount? Who is this woman in this card? Has she stolen the card?

I have in the past, tried and failed at SW, nutricheck, cambridge, hypnotherapy, myfitnesspal also tried and failed at gyms, zumba, yoga, pilates, personal training, using fitbits.

I did lose 2 stone through WW about 3 years ago but then WW changed their diet and there was nothing I liked to eat.

Is there any way in which I can lose weight whilst not eating food I hate?

This is why the no carbs @gobster.

www.verywell.com/how-do-carbohydrates-affect-blood-sugar-1087511

Cutting carbs is very good for health as without them you cut your blood sugar and train your body to burn fat rather than glucose for fuel.

Is there a particular reason you find cooking so difficult? I ask that in total sympathy, as I can honestly get in a total flap over really simple stuff (I have autism and possibly dyspraxia) - the timing, organisation, coordination etc just stress me right out. It takes me several more attempts than most people to learn new things but that's OK.

I cannot contemplate going on a diet. Ever. I instantly want to rebel against the restrictions. The only thing that has ever worked - and is working still (despite being heavily pregnant I am still losing a little, this is fine as my BMI was 40 at the beginning of the year!) is cutting DOWN. Not out, never out. I just can't and I've accepted that.

My first stop was drinks - I was totally hooked on fizzy stuff and so I stopped buying it when out and about (in corner shops etc) and stopped ordering it in my Tesco delivery. But I still have it - just once a week or so if we had a meal out. Enjoyed it sooo much more too.

I do think though that while cutting back on how much junk food you eat would technically lead to weight loss (or at least reducing any gain), it won't be enough long term. That food will make you feel shit and by eating less you will just feel hungrier too. So you really do need to bite the bullet and work damn hard at including more nutrition. You may be really deficient in vitamins etc and increasing healthy fat and protein will really help your body feel better, which will inspire you to keep going rather than the fatigue etc from takeaways. It's important for your DD too. Do it for her.

www.healthline.com/nutrition/how-many-carbs-per-day-to-lose-weight#section1

I was being slightly sarcastic about the whys but thank you for the links 😃

I am fully aware for the benefits that are pushed for the ketogenic lifestyle

It’s still boils down to eating as a calorie deficit

You can’t eat protein and fat to your hearts content you still need to eat less

Vegetables are mostly carbohydrates and full of micronutrients

Rather that trying to set people unrealistic goals it’s all boils down to the scientific equation of eat less calories that you use and you will lose weight. If you want to ensure it’s fat you lose and not muscle it’s ideal to do something that preserves it like eat decent amount of protein and weight training

The whole muscle wasting is a myth by the way. That only occurs once you have no body fat left to burn.
Surely you've heard of that Scottish man who didn't eat for an entire year, and not only survived but had no muscle wastage

I am quite interested in low carb and have ended up having to do that anyway (due to gestational diabetes - worth thinking about OP if you plan any more children, anyone can get GD but it is far more likely with raised BMI). I am cutting down and it has been really surprisingly easy as it hasn't been a case of cutting out, just down. I am absolutely planning on continuing after the birth.

It is definitely made easier by liking wider range of food though - things like avocado and eggs have been my saving grace. It's really worth persisting with increasing your palate.

If it works for you great

But the science regardless is still u eat less for being satisfied by fat and therefore don’t eat over your deficit

I just get frustrated by someone just saying cut pasta and bread and you’ll be fine as if carbs are the enemy

Carbs are just a fuel source and obviously some are better than others and some have a greater affect on blood sugar than other, but they can quite happily be consumed and you can quite happy lose weight

The OP states she’s picky and likes carbs so only realistic way for her to lose weight to make changes to eat less of the food she likes and ensure she’s eating at a deficit, once that’s working then hopefully she’s see a way to improve her diet and include things that are better for her etc

Just a thought, but if your DH works 2 jobs and you work full time and at uni, presumably finances are tight. If you weren't buying take aways so often then could the hours you are both working be cut down a bit? Cooking at home may give you more free time in the long term.

Me and DH worked out how much we were spending on take out and restaurants each month and it was scary! We now keep ready meals in the freezer and use those on nights we would previously have got take out - not as nice, but can feed us both for a fiver instead of £20!

Try Slimming World. Lots of the people in my group couldn't cook when they started, but they can now.

It's not all about Muller Lights and Mug Shots btw, despite what some critics claim.

You have to want to do it. Be really motivated, otherwise you won’t be able to stick to it.

We went abroad this year in July (for the first in about a decade). I was just massively overheating, getting really sweaty, and although we had a lovely time it was def the impetuous I needed to do something about my weight (I used to weigh nearly 14 stone). I couldn’t bear to see me in photos, so there are none of me.

I’m planning it will be different next year.

Different things work for different people and it’s a matter of finding what works for you.

SW is fantastic for keeping people motivated, ime. That's the reason it actually works.

Yes I totally agree it has to be something doable for this specific person. While plenty of people could go the whole hog with low carb, I KNOW that I couldn't - and that's fine, I am still losing weight gradually without that. I can move my overall diet in the direction of lower carb higher fat/protein, but for me and possibly OP a huge, total change could just be too much at once and lead to the whole falling off the wagon = guilt = giving up = binge cycle.

It's only working for me (personally, with the issues I have) because it is a very small, sustainable and easy change for me, and I don't feel deprived or restricted at all so I have nothing to rebel against (well, at the moment I do feel too restricted but that is because I am allowed literally no cake etc due to the GD - it'll be more relaxed after baby arrives). I am still having what I want - and that includes regular takeaway FWIW, I am just being more careful about what I order and how much. So of course I am naturally consuming less calories as well.

But I also agree with everyone who has said it is the attitude that really counts. Defeatism will lead to failure and the OP just needs to find something that she feels like she can achieve. Hopefully among the suggestions there will be something!

I used to be 20 stone, I am now 11.8 stone. PP's are right you need to retrain your palate. I was like you I couldn't cook for shit and ate junk food all the time. Then one day it clicked, I had a Nintendo Wii and did Just Dance workouts and forced myself to eat healthy food, I would eat as much lean meat as possible and peas,sweetcorn and fruit and go to bed early (crazy as it sounds but if it's possible go to sleep 2 hours early) It took me two years and a couple of cheat days but now I cook all the time, when before I would eat takeaway all the time. I make curry,spag bol,roast dinners and make my own cakes now. Until my recent clot I was running on average 30k a week. YOU CAN DO IT :D

Also I hope you are ok OP. It was very brave posting and wanting to confront this issue and I know it isn't easy reading all the replies on this sort of topic.

I don't have kids but I do work full time in a demanding job and do my degree part time. I'm a lazy cook and would rather graze on rubbish.

However, I'm doing SW (no Muller Lights, sugary cereal bars or weetabix 'cake' in sight, I promise!) and I've lost 50lbs. It takes willpower and a bit of planning but it can be done.

Jamie Olivers Ministry of food is good for learning how to cook basic things with easy to follow recipes. Your DD isn't going to be eating veggies when shes older if all she sees her parents eating are takeaways and chocolate. Why should she? Im not really one to talk as I have 2 stone to lose and am doing slimming world. But you really need to start liking vegetables. Apparently if you try something 21 times, you get used to the taste. Start tiny like you would with a child and build up.

If you insist on eating only the things you like then just create a large calorie deficit by only eating very small amounts of them. Cutting out as many carbs as possible would also help.

Op you might want to try posting in weight loss chat. Lots of friendly advice over there if you're serious about losing weight.

There isn't one way that works for everyone. My tastes changed when I started forcing myself to eat more veg. There are lots of really nice things you can do to make them taste good if you're not keen plain. It doesn't have to be boiled carrots and broccoli every day.

4-5 stones is a lot of weight.

You will only lose weight if you are able to eat less. There is no magic secret. If you already use ready meals then why don't you continue to do that for a while but buy healthy low calorie ones 🤷🏻‍♀️ It's not the 'perfect' way to lose weight but if it works then why not.

I have cracked dieting for me. If I need to lose some weight I don't fanny around pretending I'm cutting back whilst still having treats etc. what I find works is if i calorie count and stick to three meals a day plus, if I'm hungry, a snack of low calorie soup or something similar. I roughly do 250 calories for breakfast and 400 or 500 for lunch and snack combined and 400-500 for my evening meal and that's it apart from milk in coffees and tea. You just have to get on and do it and stop making excuses.

My top tip is that it doesn't actually do you any harm if you feel hungry before your meals. It means I look forward to my meals and that I enjoy them.

If you low carb, you can put butter on vegetables and oil dressings, which make them taste much better. But you cant have any potatoes, rice, bread or anything. I liked low carb, I just couldnt stick to it or really afford it. Its quite expensive.

You sound very passive , as if this weight gain has just happened to you and is outwith your control. You don't know what labels mean = well educate yourself. Your husband does all the cooking = well learn, watch youtube videos to teach yourself

As others have all said already, losing weight is about having a calorie deficit.
People are going to swear by all the different methods and diets that have worked for them but all diets use calorie deficit for weight loss however the methods are all different (see picture) and you have to find one that works for you. IE the person who loses weight on a slimming world diet may find it difficult on a weightwatchers diet. I appreciate you have a restricted diet and thats alright you can still lose weight. Dont use it as an excuse. You want to lose weight healthily however as crash dieting can actually make things worse in that you pile the weight back on.

I obviously don't know what your financial situation is but did you know there are weight loss coaches who can help you for example sustainnutrition.co.uk/new-index give you daily feedback from weight loss nutrition coaches who can tailor a sustainable plan around you and your capabilities and restrictions. They also have great youtube videos that explain things and 5 minute cooking videos

The Daniel Wheeler 80/20 plan actually teaches you all about nutrition and exactly what your body needs on a daily basis to prevent you dieting unhealthily and has a psychotherapist who helps with the emotional side of things (and the excuses we all use.)
danielwheeler.lpages.co/the-80-20-lifestyle-plan-group-7-online-through-fb-only/

So there are lots of different ways to lose weight and you have to find a way that works for you but you dont have to do it alone. There is a even weight loss section on mumsnet with lots of sub forums where you can also read up and educate yourself on calories etc and get support.

You can lose weight by having a decent breakfast (eggs or something low sugar like porridge or weetabix). Have a piece of fruit.
Soup and a sandwich for lunch.
Homemade Chinese food or ‘junk’ food (potato wedges instead of chips, baked chicken instead of fried chicken, burgers without the bun with wedges etc) for dinner.
Snack on the fruit you like.
Go for walks.

It’s not easy and you need to get into the right frame of mind first. Perhaps try Paul McKenna audio? Also - low carb, high fat is the easiest way to get quick results which might give you the short term boost to stick with it. For goodness sake, avoid bread, pasta and jacket potatoes like the plague. Spike your blood sugar quickly, leave you hungry. The dieters worst nightmare.

I bloody love chocolate, chips and takeaway but just accept i can't eat it every night and be a healthy weight. Defo do a cooking evening class or something like that, it will help you feel in control of your destiny and i bet you will try things you haven't tried before. Good luck OP